Yes it’s fine if she accepts it , I just lost
My job not to long ago and currently seeking new employment , but girls’ are still hitting me up and showing interest in me , even though I am jobless and I told them I am , and not making the money I was making before. . So if a girl is only interested in you for the money you make or have , you should really reconsider dating her , because she is clearly a good digger and only with you for your money , a girl that doesn’t care about your wallet , is in it for you , not for what’s inside your wallet , that’s a girl you should consider dating because she likes you for you. One thing I learned in life is money comes and goes so I am not going to stop liking someone because they lost their job or not making a ton of money , if they are working towards something better then that’s all that matters , if they are just sitting around doing nothing and expecting you to support them then you are best to kick them to the curb where they belong. i only date girls’ that want to be my partner , that want to work together so we both can have nice things together , and spoil each other , a girl that has work ethic in her blood that knows she can support herself if need be , that’s a girl i will be interested in , but if she is just holding her hand out to me expecting me to support her financially in everything, she is in for a rude awakening when my ass disappears from her gold digging ass
Well men lead. I've seen this plenty of times... when the girl has all the money in the relationship and y'all arnt rich she starts belittling the guy... being mean to him... her having the upper hand. Everything works better when the guy has more money or can contribute more financially in a relationship
He will even feel like a man having the money. Broke men date who they can. But once they get money... they date who they want
Long story short he will start resenting the girl too
Fair point, but that's about the people, not the money. If she belittles him for earning less, she's not a good partner. If he feels less like a man because she makes more, that's his insecurity talking. Real confidence isn't in a paycheck. Mature adults communicate, support each other, and don't keep score. Money comes and goes, character stays.
But people change like money changes... im telling you what I've seen happen. Go date a girl with money if you want lol
I'm not even looking at it like that. Money isn't a factor for me ، whether she has more or less, it doesn't change how I see her. What matters is who she is, not what she makes. And yeah, people change, but money just brings out what's already there. If a relationship falls apart over a paycheck, it was never built on anything solid to begin with.
I dont think thats necessarily true. A woman can love a man when he's broke... already on unshakable grounds. I think when women go for broke men they might be settling. And will resent that man if he doesn't change in a few years. Every woman wants stability. Women go for men for security and men go for women for sex. Its how its always been its how its always worked
I don't know im kind of busy and trying to talk to you at the same time. Im not good at giving my thoughts without missing my point sorry I couldn't get exactly what I wanted to say out but its close to what im thinking.
It is fine for a girl to date a broke guy. Women do it all the time but they shouldn't
I respect that you're being honest even if you're busy and feel like you didn't fully get your point across. I think I understand what you're saying though. But if a woman dates a broke man and resents him for not changing, that's on her, she signed up for who he was, not who he might become. And yeah, stability matters, but reducing it to (women want security, men want sex) is way too simple. People are deeper than that. So is it fine to date a broke guy? Sure if she actually loves him, not his potential. But settling and waiting for change? That's a gamble, not love.
Seeing someones potential shouldn't be the reason a woman settles. Most women arnt going to settle for a broke man. Thats like the woman wearing the pants in a relationship. Most women dont want that
As simple as I can put it.
If a woman dates a broke guy and feels like she's settling, that's on her she made that call. And look, I do believe a man should lead in a relationship. That's just how I see it working best. But leading isn't about who makes more money. It's about having a backbone, having a plan, and knowing where you're going. A broke guy with direction can still lead. A rich guy with no clue? Not so much. So if she doesn't want a broke dude, that's totally fair ،don't date one. But if she does and it doesn't work out, she can't turn around and act like it's his fault. She chose that path too.
Either way, I respect your opinion and your time for trying to explain your side
I agree with you its more about character. I didn't see it that way. Sorry I sound like a gold digger but I've dated broke men. Maybe ones where they were more dreamers then doers🤷🏾♀️
I didn't even see it that way until you broke it down so thank you for that. You don't sound like a gold digger at all. You sound like somebody who gave chances, believed in people, and got tired of being the only one holding it down. That's not greedy , that's drained. Dreamers are beautiful, but love without action gets exhausting. I genuinely respect you for being this honest, it takes guts.
My man tries and im still tired. Im sure he's tired of my nagging ass too. I bet we both won't settle next time if we can't make our relationship work. And 💯 thank you for seeing my side and not being too hard on me. Appreciate you.
Nobody's perfect, and relationships take work. If it works out, good. If not, at least you'll know better next time. Respect for keeping it real.
I have really bad adhd of course I know character is more important than money and looks its just how your words made more sense smh im sorry
No need to apologize. ADHD or not, coming back to say this says everything about your character. We're good
Thank you sir 🫡
At ease, Lieutenant 🫡
Opinion
23Opinion
MOST women want equality without the responsibilities. They want leadership without having to follow. MOST men don't care about materialistic crap like money. All they want to know is that the girl is with them through thick and thin and that they're kind, have good chemistry with them, and give them peace rather than nagging them every second to do something. It's sad that women see it as having "standards." They are just not romantic in the slightest.
https://www.youtube.com/embed/suCm5oW0bv0Yes and no, it is about where you are in life and where you hope to go in life, for example is he broke bc he’s in grad school? That is one thing but broke, just getting by, no plan is something else. JMO!
Most Women are basically parasites. They use their looks to manipulate men into buying things for them and paying their bills. They're taught as young girls the rich man myth. The rich man myth is that if they hold out long enough and put out enough and get in the right social circles one day a rich man will notice them and marry them and they will never have to work. The reality is most rich guy don't give a f about the girls they date and toss them away when they're done with them. Most rich guys are nice or good people at all. You don't get rich by being nice and playing fair. You have to be a cutthroat godless mf er to be rich. And usually you have to be born into it. I know a girl who believed in the rich man myth and she paid for it. He got high on meth got pissed off at her and beat the s#it out her so bad she have permanent brain damage. His father used his influence to get him off the hook. So he walks free and she's so messed up she can't remember the day before because of the brain damage.
To be fair, it is up to the individual. There are so many mixed messages coming at each sex! If I want a man that makes a good living and can take care of a family, then I'm a gold digger. If I want a career so I can survive on my own, while giving up my best reproductive years as a woman, I'm a radical feminist.
We all have the right to choose what works for us. A man providing for his family? That's a good thing and nothing wrong with that. But outside of starting a family, expecting a woman to handle everything on her own while also judging her for wanting financial security? That's not fair at all. People love putting labels on both men and women no matter what they choose, men are either (traditional or backwards), women are either (gold diggers or fighters) But at the end of the day, your choices are yours.
I know what you mean. In my teens and early 20s I used to do yard work& pool cleaning for a lot of wealthy families. None of their daughters would date me as I was a brokie at the time but I was 6ft7 lean and muscular with a 6 pack and played sports. I had plenty of confidence and didn't give a f*ck. Like I say they wouldn't date me but I f*cked a lot of those daughters. One family I f*cked 4 out of 5 daughters, the mother, the step mother, the maid, the babysitter. Also a lot of the wives, now in my 40s married with kids id never hire a gardener, pool boy, fitness instructor any young boy or man because of all the wivrs that cheated on their husbands with me
Well here , it would be needle in a haystack stuff not to date a broke girl , but I still prefer the wealthiest ones.. Why? Better education , better environment, speak English well , good family , good job / career , complete finishing school ( as I have ) ..
If I was a babe in my 20/ 30s , NO WAY I'd bother with a broke man , a broke clever start up type guy maybe , an investor with potential.
Particularly in USA ( moreso ) money is vital , Status is important , and nice to be understated and wealthy, if you don't have 5 mill plus by 50 years ( excluding PPR ) you are just not in the game.
I would rather date a barista than a doctor because the barista doesn't take her work home and is generally more fun than some stressed out career woman. I make enough that my wife feels financially secure and doesn't stress out about work or money. The financial imbalance works for us just fine. I've dated rich women and find them boring. My wife had a corporate career, got burned out and now is happy to look after the household.
Because men’s standards start and end with a pretty face, while women want a grown man with a career and a working brain.
Pretty face gets you in the door, it doesn't keep you there. Men have standards too, we just don't advertise them like a shopping list. We want peace, loyalty, femininity, and a woman who adds to our lives, not just drains our wallet while flexing a degree she got from daddy's checkbook. You want a (grown man with a career)? Cool but grown men with options aren't lining up for a woman who brings nothing to the table except expectations and a pretty face. We're filtering for substance too, we just don't need to announce it.
I guess that is your choice. Then don't date broke girls? I guess some guys are just more desperate to date and more girls will wait until a decent guy comes along.
A decent guy to me isn't about money. He should just be stable. He doesn't have to be rich. I don't date anyways. So this is not an issue for me.
That's cute, but totally backwards. You're literally proving my point women wait for a decent guy, men are desperate? Nah. Guys aren't desperate anymore. We're just not as easy to get as y'all think. The tables turned, sweetheart. We're the ones being picky now.
Because women expect men to pay for them, and if a man is broke, the woman will have nothing to do with him, or if she does and finds out, she will discard him, and she will find a man who is able and willing to pay for her. Women find the expectation that they should care for and pay for themselves to be insulting.
true many gals put money as a condition, but i am not rich not even "median" and i have been a chick magnet. even age 50. many here would not approve of my age gaps [despite over 18] so i will hide that. but i agree with update.
There is no law that says either.
It is a CHOICE to date anyone regardless of if they are poor, disabled or American.
You should ways endeavour to do better than you have. That is just common sense.
Yup that's the reality we live in.
There is nothing new in this,
Looks + money = attractive
Looks - money= average
Money - looks= avg
-money - look = unattractive
Also the confidence, way of speaking, accent.
Men are also like that but it works in a different way.
Age and looks only.
Because a man isn’t birthing a baby and staying home recuperating with the baby, Dumas. If you’re a broke bum then she’s not going to see that future with you, therefore you are not suitable for a serious long term relationship or marriage. If she’s not looking to have a have a family or a future with a guy or just wants to fuck around, s girl will date a bum. Wishful thinking isn’t going to change the way women have been thinking for a million years, whether you like it or not.
Fair point on the biology part (congrats), you passed basic common sense. But here's where your logic falls flat,, not every woman's a walking calculator, and not every broke guy's a bum. some of us actually have ambition, which is something money can't buy but divorce lawyers sure love billing for. Money ain't the glue that keeps a marriage solid ask any rich guy paying alimony to his ex who couldn't stand him. And trust me, guys with options are filtering too. We're not all out here thirsty for daddy's money and a finishing school certificate. You keep measuring worth in zeros, I'll keep measuring it in substance. Call it wishful thinking if it helps you sleep at night, I call it not being shallow enough to confuse a bank balance with a personality.
because when women get pregnant, they can't work... that is why it's so important to marry a man who has enough money to support her. Once the baby comes out, someone needs to take care of the baby. Usually it's the woman... now if the mother also works, and she has to breastfeed all night long without sleeping, it is going to make her life tremendously harder.
a man who cannot support his children is the same as an anonymous sperm donor. No different from going to sperm bank
What if the man's salary isn't enough and he's already stressed at work and home? What's the right move as a good wife? Patience, or running away? I'd say patience, but not blind patience. If he's lazy, that's different. But if he's working hard and still showing up? That man deserves grace.
life isn't always fair. Just because his salary is good today doesn't mean it'll be the same tomorrow. Jobs get lost, businesses fail, health changes. Nothing is guaranteed. So if you're only there for the paycheck, what happens when it shrinks or disappears?
Money comes and goes, but a man who grinds and still comes home to his family? That's rare. So if his heart's in the right place, you stay. You build. You figure it out together. That's what a real partnership looks like.
@Asker
Intelligent, ambitious, Hard working men don't tend to be poor. So if you are poor at 40, there is usually a reason for it.
To say that women will see a financially well off man the same as a completely broke man is like saying there is no difference between dating a 39 yr old woman compared to a 22 yr old woman.
but it's wrong to have kids you cannot adequately provide for. your job as a parent is to make sure those kids are well fed, well clothed, well educated and ensured a good childhood. There is NO EXCUSE for a parent to fail on his responsibilities.
When money goes, your kid's starve... can't go to college... can't get a decent education... no future.
I agree with some of what you're saying especially about not having kids you can't provide for. That's just irresponsible, plain and simple. No argument there. But lets push back a little. Saying intelligent, ambitious, hardworking men don't end up poor? That's not always true. Sometimes we don't choose what happens to us. life hits people differently. Medical issues, family emergencies, industries collapsing plenty of smart, driven men have hit hard times through no fault of their own. So judging a man's worth solely by his bank account at 40? That's surface level thinking.
And comparing a broke man to an older woman? That analogy doesn't really hold up. Age and financial status aren't the same thing. A man can be broke today and rich tomorrow. A 39-year-old woman can't become 22 again.
So yeah, I'm with you on the responsibility part don't have kids if you can't take care of them. That's non negotiable. But let's not act like a man's current bank account defines his entire future or his character. Life is more complicated than that.
@Asker
smart people have enough money saved up for family emergencies. I grew up in a poor family, we never failed to pay for a funeral or wedding. My parents were good at saving. Smart people go for jobs that provide medical insurance so they don't end up with medical debt. Smart people don't live in places they can't afford. Smart people make smart life choices.
[And comparing a broke man to an older woman? That analogy doesn't really hold up. Age and financial status aren't the same thing. A man can be broke today and rich tomorrow. A 39-year-old woman can't become 22 again.]
Looks come and goes just the same way as money.
Just the same way a 22 yr old can be young and pretty one day then unattractive at 39.
but if you had a choice to pick which one you would marry, you likely wouldn't pick the ugly one.
I respect that your parents raised you well and taught you how to save that's a blessing, not everyone gets that. But calling it (smart) like it's just a choice? That's oversimplifying it. Not everyone starts from the same place. Some people grow up with zero financial literacy, no safety net, no one to teach them. And even the smartest people can get hit with something life throws at them, health issues, accidents, economic crashes. It's not always about being (smart or dumb) Sometimes it's just about luck and circumstances. And about your analogy you're right, looks fade. But here's the difference (a woman isn't defined by her looks at 22 or 39. Just like a man isn't defined by his bank account at 30 or 50. We're all more than that).
So yeah, if I had to choose between two people one with money, one without, I'd look at character, not the wallet. Because money can disappear overnight, but who you are? That stays.
@Asker
smart people don't need to be taught. Any person with a decent brain will understand the importance of a savings... its common sense. If someone needs to TEACH you on why it's important to have savings... then you are probably stupid. Doesn't take a genius to understand this.
Intelligent people tend to be financially stable because jobs that require high levels of intelligence tend to pay better. You're not gonna say that a doctor will be paid the same as a cashier.
From my experience, unambitious people tend to suffer the most later in life. The things that you do in your youth will affect your financial situation once you get older.
[Just like a man isn't defined by his bank account at 30 or 50. We're all more than that).]
without money, there is no life. you won't be able to sustain your children's lives either. So don't go around acting like money doesn't matter.
LOL. Having savings doesn't make you a genius it means you had a head start. I never said money doesn't matter. It does. But money comes and goes, and sometimes that's out of your control even with savings. So calling people 'stupid' for not having savings? That's not intelligence, that's ignorance. Keep flexing your bank account if you want, but honestly? You're not as bright as you clearly think you are.
@Asker
When you are financially stable, your wife won't have to work while heavily pregnant. It is better , healthier for her and the baby.
The reality of marrying a poor man:
going back to work while pain from incision after a C section?
standing 8-12 hours a day while heavily pregnant
increase chance of suffering from swollen feet, gestational diabetes, hypertension. back hurting from the sheer weight of carrying the baby?
increased risk of bad outcomes for the baby...
The number in the bank is not just a mere number. It dictates the mother's life and the baby's life.
a mother staying up all night long breastfeeding her crying baby without sleep, then FORCING her to return back to the next morning at 8am.
Money will not matter to you UNTIL you can no longer afford rent because your landlord is demanding 1000 dollars more a month, UNTIL inflation hits again and now the cost of groceries is an additional 400 a month
Cost of living will only continue to rise as time goes on. Things only get more expensive as time goes on.. never cheaper.
In 10 years, once things become unaffordable, you may very well regret posting this dumb post.
Oh wow, thank you for that economics lesson really mind blowing stuff. Did you stay up all night thinking of that? Nobody knew rent and groceries go up until you blessed us with your wisdom. You're not dropping knowledge, you're just stating the obvious like it's some kind of revelation.
And you called my post 'dumb'? That's actually hilarious, especially since you clearly didn't even understand it. I never said money doesn't matter, but reading isn't your strong suit, is it? You're out here stressing about rent in 10 years like it's your full time job. Must be exhausting living with that much fear in your head. But hey, keep worrying it seems to be working out great for you, saving girl.
@angrycarl3
ok so if it was so obvious why women are better off marrying and bearing children with financially stable men then why go around acting like money doesn't matter?
The respectable thing to do is just put your ego away and admit that you were wrong... but obviously immaturity is preventing you from doing that. This is what differentiates a boy from the grown man.
@msc545
A man has to do NOTHING for his kids to be born. It's the woman doing all the suffering...
He has done nothing for the kids
And now you are telling me that he doesn't need to support his kids?
Why not all moms just become single moms then?
@msc545
just because you are married, it does not mean you can't be a single mom.
way too many women who are married to husbands who don't do anything at all.
Just don't spend any money on them or ever marry them if they act like that. A prostitute is a prostitute. You're not going to change a ho.
It's only OK if the guy finds a broke girl acceptable. And a girl has every right to make that same judgement of a broke guy. You seem pissed that women are making better life decisions than men. Good luck with that.
Not pissed, just fair. Same rules. You good?
Yup.
Yes, but I'll get him to start up a business or something
Ugh, you are that troll just looking for dummies to agree with your delusional theories on women.
Don't take the bait, people.
OnlyFans got you thinking you're a philosopher now? Relax, your best content is still behind a paywall
Cause guys look for character and girls look for other things - mostly money
Guys are judged by how much money they have., Girls are judged on looks.
Supply and demand. An average girl, even a broke one, gets far more suitors than a guy who is broke.
I would as long as he was trying to better his circumstances
Nobody expects a woman to do anything. Men are needed to do everything
I don't know where you ever came up with the idea that it's okay to date broke girls. That's a horrible idea. Whoever told you that should get a punch in the face
Wait !! so you're telling me dating broke girls is a horrible idea, but dating broke guys is just 'preference'? That's crazy. You can't call it a bad move one way and call it freedom the other. Either standards apply both ways, or they don't apply at all. Pick one
It's fine for anyone to date anyone. Your question is incorrect.
(It's fine for anyone to date anyone) okay, cool, tell that to the gold diggers and the broke boys getting ghosted. The question ain't wrong, you just don't like the answe.
Get a job working 30 hours a week outside the house. Work out in some way three times a week. Do some volunteer work or contribute to a benevolent cause in your neighbourhood. You'll already be in the top 20% of guys.
This is how we're taught from a young age. Before we even know what is right and wrong.
Simple. It's called "hypocrisy"!!!
Because of internalised misandry.
Simples...
I don’t judge people for their money
Traditional gender roles.
Men are still viewed as breadwinners
That's cause of the patriarchal society.
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