I'm terrified my little sister is going to have her first kiss before me!

[Anonymous]

I'm 19 and I've always been really shy. I was asked out a few times, but I didn't like any of the guys back, so I turned them down. I met a guy at college this year and flirted a lot and sometimes treated each other like we were a couple(minus kissing), but it didn't go anywhere because he wasn't over his ex. Rather than just tell me that, he led me on while thinking about it for a while, therefore, screwing me over.

My sister is 15 and she's finishing her freshman year in high school. She's also shy, but not near as shy as me. She has made a lot of friends and I'm scared she's going to get a boyfriend and have her first kiss before me.

This is all hitting me now that I wasted about 2 months hanging out with this guy I thought was going to end up being my boyfriend. As dumb as it sounds, I've been waiting to meet a really good guy to be my first kiss because I know I'll regret it if I kiss some jerk. And he did end up being a jerk. I could've been talking to other guys, but I just focused on him. I've learned my lesson there, but I'm still afraid my little sister is going to have her first kiss before me. I'm so worried about this.

My sister's guy friends hit on me and my 17 year old brother's friends tell him I'm pretty and my friends say I'm pretty, but it's gotten me nowhere (not that I'd go out with a 17 year old lol). I don't know what to do. I really want my first kiss to be special, but at the same time I just want to kiss someone so I will have done it before my sister. Someone please tell me something to make me feel better. I don't really know what I'm asking.

[SlipKid75]

Well, first off, that guy didn't try to kiss you/get physical so he wasn't really leading you in a romantic direction. College age guys will make a move after a week at most, often on the first date. I think what happened is that you put expectations on him that you didn't actually verbalize to him and so you expected something that was not connected to reality. People do that all the time. It's why so many older people say communication is the basis of a good relationship, so you don't saddle each other with false expectations.

Secondly, it's not a race. It doesn't matter when you have your first kiss versus when she does. If she met the man of her dreams tomorrow, she should kiss him right? She has a totally separate life, personality, body, etc... than you. I was a "late bloomer" and didn't have my first kiss until I was 17. But after that I was going way beyond kissing in a matter of months. It makes you realize that a kiss is not such a big deal. Yes, you will remember who that first kiss was, but it will seem like a sweet, nice thing that happened in the past, nothing more. I remember my first kiss as a sweet memory, even though that girl ended up being a bitch to me later on. Doesn't change the memory.

Don't waste your time and energy competing with your sis over things like that. Just be positive and support each other and in the long run you'll be happier and both of you will attract more guys, and better ones too.

[Asker]

Actually, he tried to kiss me a few times, but he also wanted to make out and I thought it was too soon. We'd only been on one date.

[SlipKid75]

Uh, when you rejected his advances you kind of killed his interest in you. That hurts a lot of guys' pride. Girls do not get just how much rejection the average guy has to take in his lifetime. It's constantly there. So, it's still on you.

[Asker]

He tried to kiss me AFTER he got back in contact with his ex. That's how he led me on. He mentioned they hung out and they were still friends. That very day, after he told me that, he brought me to his house and tried to kiss me on his bed. When I got home that day I looked at his FB and the day before, his friend had written "so glad to see you and (her name) together again" and he said "me too <3 <3 <3" I'm pretty sure I was just backup in case it didn't work out.

[SlipKid75]

Then why did you keep seeing him if you knew he was getting back with his ex?

[TheBlaxican]

It doesn't matter. I haven't done anything with a girl and I'm 19. Some people just put that stuff off. It shouldn't be a race to see who gets kissed first

[livi23]

My little sister had her first kiss way before me. She makes me feel like the better daughter. My sister is quite slutty compared to me. Don't worry about it.

[Anonymous]

Let me get this straight , your concerned that your younger sister is going to have her first kiss before you..seriously maybe she's just a little more mature then you.