A guy being vague after first date!!!?? am I right to stay quiet!!

[roxiehart]

I have been chatting to a guy online for 3 weeks and he traveled an hour to see, we met for a date and had a great time! It was too late for him to catch train home, so he asked to stay at mine and I said in the spare room!...he fell asleep on my couch anyhow and as I reach over to turn light out he pulled me near and one thing led to another and we had a fumble...we did not have sex...anyway this carried on and off all night and morning! Since he left he has called me and was chatty and friendly...dropped huge hints he likes me and he had a great time...but still hasn't asked to see me again...my common sense tells me either he has had his fumble and wants some more...or he just hasn't got the guts to ask me out again...its all too vague...help!

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+1 y

well since then he has phoned me twice and we have had a great laugh...but still not sign of him asking!?!

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+1 y

well I did it...mid convo L.nite I asked him out in a jokey way...the response? he laughed! bear in mind he doesn't take compliments easy...still no excuse..am I rite to feel little insulted!? a bit rude really!

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+1 y

and STILL NO REPLY! he virtually ignored me after that!

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+1 y

i have deleted him off everything..phone, facebook...im not putting up with that crap! onwards and upwards...!

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+1 y

hahahaha he called and I said couldn't keep my mouth shut...is not in my nature to do that...told him how I thought it was rude that he didn't answer me...and he apologized and I said its cool...just one of my pet hates, and now he still ignoring me..lmao!

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+1 y

and he is gone...i told him he gotta learn to open his mouth and talk if he is really interested...no skin off my nose got anutha date next wknd! heeeeeee heeeeee next!

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+1 y

that's anutha date with a diff guy just to clarify! I am taking myself out of that guys 'GAME' as you put it!

[chettah-two]

He seems like he is playing games...

Or he may not be into you, of which I highly doubt (because he is initiating most contact).

Either ask him outright for another date and be really cool about it too (as if you asking to meet up with your gf).

But I recommend just play it cool by not asking for another date or talking about that night.

It sort of like who will back down first...

Also try to date other people and let him no in an indirect way...

If he likes you it just increases his attraction to you if he doesn't then he will feasil away.

I know its weird advice but this guy sounds like he is playing mind games...

[roxiehart]

Well I agree that he does like me...coz I every time I leave a comment on my facebook status when we do chat he talks about it...which shows he has been looking at my facebook! Also when I do not speak to him for a day or 2 he txts me asking how I'm doin...i have given him enough hugh hints that I like him....so yes I think best left alone again that way I will know his interested....or lack of for that matter!!!

[chettah-two]

We guys are not really good at picking up hints..lol

[roxiehart]

Im getting that.....lol....still leaving him alone thou!!! god I feel evil espec if he is not taking the hint!!!

[chettah-two]

I have to respect the guy's GAME,, he has got you BEGGING for another date.

Probably you will put out aswell. Or you will probably BEG to have sex.

Didnt mean to sound rude...

But DONT put out please, make him think he is gonna get it and then DONT.. because he is doing the same thing to you.

[Shlei3]

Why not ask him if he'd like to do something. It's not a bad thing to take initiative sometimes. Perhaps he thinks you are'nt into him.

[sweetnsassy23]

I think you should take it slow & hang out some more before things go further.Make sure you're really into this guy and if he's worth it.even though you've been chatting with him online for three weeks you still take it slow.Also,letting him spend the night on the first date isn't good.You should just have told him I'm sorry but I hardly know you.Seems to me like he's trying to push his boundaries.Online dating is very tricky.Next time you should just meet up for lunch or coffee.Keep it simple.

[Shlei3]

Again, why not ask him to do something sometimes?

[roxiehart]

I guess I'm prob bit wary I mite be rejected or get the 'i just wanna be friends' speech....but hey I guess I know where I will stand right?

[Shlei3]

Exactly. It's just a guy so don't let the fear of rejection get in your way.

[roxiehart]

To be honest I think we led each other on a bit in terms of teasing each other physically....and that may of confused things on both sides!!!

[Shlei3]

The only way to clear it up is to talk about it. Communication is key.

[roxiehart]

Yr def right on that one....a friend told me guys are straight talkers not mind readers...!

[Shlei3]

Well you asked, although it would have been better to do it straight out instead of joking around because he may have thought you were kidding. Next time just ask straight out if he'd like to go see a movie, eat dinner, go bowling or whatever else you had in mind and don't joke around about it.

[Shlei3]

That's good that you are straight to the point. Can I ask you a question? What are you looking for in a guy?

[roxiehart]

Im looking for someone who has a strong personality much like myself, who isn't afriad to say what he thinks or feels and doesn't run off when I do!!!! emotionally mature I guess...but also knows how to have a fantastic time...great laugh....and slightly mad in the fun sense...an equal to me!!!!