Guys: Does it really matter who texts first?

I've been talking to this guy that I went out with. He had to leave for work so we're keeping in touch through texting/messaging. He texted first the last ten times we talked and I've texted him the last two times. He always carries on conversation with questions and long answers. He's shy and not a very good texter. Does it matter if I text him first or he texts me first so long as we both carry on the conversation? I have a feeling he's waiting for me to text first again, should I since he's shy? Would it be rude to end the next conversation with something like "I've got to go, but you should text me sometime. :)" do you think he'll get the hint that I want him to text me first?


Most Helpful Guy

  • You know what? It doesn't really matter.

    I sometimes want to text this girl that I like and haven't heard from in a while and think..."What the heck!" and send her a text. I receive a reply several minutes later. But when you text...say something witty...not just "Hi." Ask him a question or send him a little joke...that's what I do with a girl I like. :-)

    The only time you don't want to text a guy is if you already sent him like 5-10 texts and he still hasn't replied! Haha. Then you'll seem a bit OCD.

    Another good idea...send him a pic :-)

    • I was thinking about texting first and saying "so I'm looking for some new music, any suggestions? :)" cause while we were out he told me that he likes music with a good beat so I figured that may be a good way. What do you think?

    • Yeah... give it a shot :)

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What Guys Said 3

  • It does matter in the sense that if I'm doing all the initiating and the girl almost never starts a text conversation with me, I will assume that she is just responding to be polite and that she really isn't interested in going out with me. A lot of time, she just isn't interested, but also, a lot of the time, she is and just coy.

    Still, in your position, you should still text him regularly, even if it's not as much as he texts you.

    And it's not wrong to hint at him texting you more. And the way you said it is perfect. If the guy is interested and sees your message, he will text you more.

  • It doesn't really matter who texts first since if both people want to make it work, then it shouldn't matter at all.

  • Girls seem to think it really matters.


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