Education & Career

What Are Your Expectations?

I was thinking about a conversation I had with a friend, James, over the weekend about his expectations for himself, i.e., relationships, career etc. He said he had high expectations and realized they were not being met by the people in his life. I asked him why they were so high and he said he always believed high expectations lead to great gains/results. Dating the right woman, having the right career, driving the right car, having the right hairstyle, dressing the right way, etc etc.

What Are Your Expectations?

I told him I don't have high expectations. Living life, thus far, has made me reticent about expecting anything from others. I create my own reality and set the bar for myself differently than what I expect from others. I want to do a great job at work with zero drama. I'm not politically savvy and I find I'm content when I simply do my job. James works in a sales environment which he says is very cutthroat. He's trying to climb the managerial ladder which involves schmoozing. He takes the 'right' woman with him to these events, because appearance is everything.

What Are Your Expectations?

He's not found a consistent good relationship because his expectations aren't realistic. The perfect woman for him is politically connected, drop dead gorgeous, a Harvard graduate, wealthy and willing to be an accessory in his life. James comes first. He also admonishes me about my lack of ambition and the fact I should set my expectations high. I don't agree. People are different and those differences should be accepted, or, at the very least, tolerated. I don't settle in relationships for the sake of one. I will never be wealthy. I have enough to pay my bills and treat myself, family or friends out for happy hour, bowling, movies etc. I can buy a book every week and I still save money every week. James believes my expectations should be higher and I feel always on the verge of calling me a loser. He hasn't yet, but if he does, I would have to rethink our friendship.

What Are Your Expectations?

So, I would ask you, (yes you, the person reading this My Take), what are your expectations? Are they realistic? Do you settle when things don't work out? Do you try again? Is your life enough for you? Do you also have a friend like James who insists you should be more ambitious and driven to the point where you don't know yourself anymore? He insists he's happy, but I don't see it. Thank you for reading and I would love to hear from you.

What Are Your Expectations?
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