This mytake will discuss how college affected my beauty standards within myself. I'm not trying to say that I do not care about my looks however when students at a college level start ridiculing you about your looks that is problem cause its very immature and stupid. I'm there to get an education not to empress other students just to keep up with the status quo.
From middle school to college (yes college) I have always been teased for my looks. In middle school I was getting taunted and bullied from kids that are from my own race because of how I look. It took a toll in my life because it led to me wearing light make up in the 8th grade such as eye shadow and lipstick. Even though a lot of people always told me that I was pretty and the people who were calling me ugly were jealous, their comments still affected me because as a black girl I always wondered what if my skin was lighter? Would I be considered pretty by them. This resulted in me not feeling comfortable with my skin tone for a long time.
Years later I started college at the age of 18. My freshman through junior year of college was complete hell for me. I would have girls from my own race telling me how ugly my features were and how I need to shop at Fashion Nova etc. No matter how many times I would try to fix my looks they would still try to find something that wrong with me. The teasing got so bad it resulted in me trying to commit suicide but I couldn't do it. As a result I stopped hanging around the group of girls who were taunting me which took a lot of weight off my shoulders. Even though I'm just going to class I tend to fully dress up for class. Such as wearing dresses or nice jumpsuits, full fledged make up, high heels, and wearing nice hairstyles. It got to a point wear a lot of students were confused whether going to class or going on a nice date or a business meeting. However it eventually led to where I will never go to class looking casual because I'm afraid I would get pointed out for it. One day I got really upset cause a random girl at the college walked up to me telling me how a group of Caribbean students were talking about how bad my eye shadow looked even though other people were telling me how good it looked she told me those people were lying. I actually went off on the girl cause one its rude as fuck to walk up to somebody and tell them how bad they look. Two I really don't know you like that and you're trying to give me a makeup lesson when you don't wear make up yourself? Another similar incident took place where my friend called me in the middle of the night around 12 due to an emergency. I went to her room but I wasn't expecting her friend to be there. Her friend kept bashing me and told me my legs were hairy and she assumes that just because they were hairy she assumes that my vagina was not shaved neither. This also got me upset to cause its sad how people from my own race like to tear me down while to other ethnicity and races they see me as beautiful.
By these negative experiences it lead to a shopping addiction. Shopping for the latest clothes and makeup so I could empress people which is starting to become tiring. By my shopping addiction I realized how ridiculous it was and just started loving myself for who I am no matter what anybody says. I started breaking away from negative people and just started being my own friend. To conclude this myTake I want to tell all girls and guys DON'T let anybody put you down for your looks! Love yourself no matter what! Focus on your goals such as graduating, getting a job etc. Let me know in the comments below about your experience or what you think of this myTake. Please do not leave any rude comments towards me or anyone else if they talk about their experience cause you will get your commented deleted and your will be blocked or reported. Take care and see you for my next myTake.