I am concerned that if I don't respond to their non-work related conversations, I'll be harassed or not be seen as team player. I care about them as colleagues and will go out of my way to help them with work. How do I politely stop them from engaging me in non-work related way? I have in the past engaged with them when I was lonely and unaware how toxic the workplace was. Now that I have been here for awhile, I have been victim of bullying/gaslighting from several coworkers and manager here. One coworker says that we are work place brothers and seems to get a bit annoyed if I don't agree. Help.
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To give you an idea of the toxicity:
-Group of coworkers has joked about another coworker behind his back about being an animal that pees everywhere.
-Group of coworkers has joked about another coworker behind his back about being an animal that pees everywhere.
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Here are some suggestions for setting clear boundaries with coworkers:
- Be polite but brief when they try engaging you in personal talks. Example: "Sorry, I need to focus on work right now."
- Direct conversations back to work-related topics. Example: "How's that project coming along?"
- Avoid one-on-one interactions where possible, and stay in open areas.
- Set an out-of-office auto-reply on email/chat for non-work hours to avoid late night contact.
- Document specific incidents of bullying/toxic behavior and report to HR if it continues. That kind of disrespect shouldn't be tolerated.
- Make it clear you're there to do your job well and get along professionally with everyone. Your personal life is separate.
- Joining in on putting others down will only encourage more negativity. Kill that behavior with kindness toward all instead.
Stay confident communicating your boundaries in a calm, mature manner. In time they'll adjust - and if not, at least you protected your well-being. You got this! Let me know if other strategies would be helpful.
Be upfront and honest.