Death Of A Loved One: Questions, Regret...Hope

[K-Cool-Dude]

“It wasn't fair”
“It shouldn't have happened”
“She should have survived”

Thoughts flow around my mind the moment I hear the news. Why death? She could have just made it to us. I feel so bad for her. I have witnessed many deaths before: the death of my grandfather, my good friend’s father and many relatives; but none was like this one – so simple, but still so harsh. Attempts to investigate and express my thoughts on it make my mind suddenly full of blackouts and I am left with nothing but a stock full of questions that traverses my mind again and again – a stock of uncertain ideas that can’t be explained by words.

“Was it the only way things could have happened?”

No, there were many ways, but fate seemed to take her this way due to the sensing of a mysterious notion that no one seem to explain. I have not cried, I have not expressed my sadness or anger to any of the people I live among but have been really depressed since.

“In November last year, she was so happy, so cheerful...” – and so unmindful of the things that were going to happen to her. Who knew that a pain in her thigh bone would be a fracture, and that would be a bone cancer. But the most sorrowful thing is that she didn't die because of the cancer, but of the overdose of certain medicines or radiations that were passed onto her and crept until resulted in a memory loss able to utter the name of her best friend only, everything else was forgotten. It’s this accident that made me feel so bad for her.

This time we dream of things we’d accomplish in the future, set out our goals and objectives for the coming years, but she struggled only for life and a sight not of what was coming but what she had then – her family, her friends and a special person. This tells us of an idea of regret that we are just so lucky to be alive. We complain of things, we accuse everyone for our failures, we complain of the environment to be responsible for what had happened to us, but we never see the positive side of life, just the feeling of it. The cold air, the pleasant sunny day, our family, friends, and people who care about us – we never thank them for being with us.

Life is a pretty mysterious thing. No one knows what could happen to us – the next day, the next hour or the next second. And this is what makes life so interesting. But we must learn to stay positive because it doesn't matter how long we live, but what we did in the time we had lived.

Rest in Peace. You taught us a lot about how lucky we are. May the sun rise for you again and you at least get the peace you deserved - wherever you are.

[bryon]

Life is indeed full of mystery. And regardless of the outcome it's always filled with wonder , when shared with a friend. So very sorry for your loss dude.

[K-Cool-Dude]

I wonder how her parents felt since her father also died when she was five years old, he was a soldier and was shot in the battlefield.

[bryon]

I am sure there is a vast void in their lives dude. Having lost my son 5 1/2 half years ago I know their pain. Despite the time that has passed I still find things that break me. He and I shared so many things , more things in common than most parent / kids do. So sometimes it's a bit of a struggle to maintain my composure when I go to do something that we used to do together.

[K-Cool-Dude]

Sorry for your loss.

[bryon]

Thank you dude

[K-Cool-Dude]

Mention not..