Are you the type of person that looks at all the cheerful ads of families gathered around a 20lb turkey, all smiling with a rosy glow to their cheeks, and think to yourself, that is bullsh-- because your family, or at least, certain members of them, are the absolute worst. They come in like corralled bulls, destroy your nice things, ask you for the billionth time why you divorced that "good" wife or husband of yours 5 years ago or why you still feel like you don't need to have kids, criticize your choices in life, belittle you, dig up old wounds, fight over everything, overstay their welcome, and then, if you're lucky, you don't have to see them until Christmas. And here you are again, it's that time again, and your family is rolling in. How can you possibly survive a few hours, let alone an entire week plus with them in town?
1. Exercise
Exercise is a great stress reliever and can be a good excuse to literally get up and leave. Suddenly the dog needs constant attention and walking, the baby won't go down for a nap and a long stroller walk is the only way she'll fall asleep, you're trying to lower your blood sugar levels, so exercise is mandatory and needs to be done as often as possible. Whatever your reasoning, real or fake, just getting out, seeing the trees, feeling the breeze on your face, can help calm your nerves and relieve some stress.
2. Don't serve alcohol
If you know, every year, as soon as the drinks come out, things get ugly, cut out the accelerant to all your bad Holiday memories. Wait until it's too late in the game to send someone out for spirits and let the first person who asks, know you forgot the wine, beer, or cocktails. This will make for a short night for those that can't stand a festivity without a drink or truly have a drinking problem. It will also help make sure no one passes out drunk on your couch in a pile of their own vomit.
3. Boss Up
If you are a fully formed adult, maybe it IS time to actually confront some issues that have been festering for years. Yeah, the holidays are not exactly an ideal time to put it all on the table, and truly if you're not hosting and someone asks to you to respect sacred family time and not fight, then do so, but if this is your only chance, you can talk to family members that are bothering you outside of the day, or before it about some issues. You may be able to actually resolve them, or at least put them on notice that you aren't going to be a punching bag anymore or accept them bullying you or poor treatment from them.
4. Be A Busy Bee
Give all the parents a break and offer a night where they can go out, and you babysit, or become super involved in cooking all the meals, or suddenly the wiring needs fixing so you need to concentrate on that. Being super involved in other activities can give you something to do, and excuse to say you're busy or need to concentrate and don't have time to talk to certain people, and actually help you accomplish some tasks that you may have been dodging otherwise.
5. Book Them a Room
Three days and nights at your house, no thank you. It may literally be important to your sanity to book relatives a room somewhere else, or barring that, draw straws with siblings on who gets "those relatives." If you've been unlucky and they've stayed with you for the past 4 years, now it's a siblings turn or a cousins turn, and simply ensure that you have no room for those relatives this year by inviting other friends or family to fill up your house if other family are resistant on taking them in.
6. Make it a short visit
If you are going to another family/friends house for Thanksgiving and you just can't take long hours of dealing with your relatives, forget having to deal with the stress and make it a short visit. Tell your immediate family, your significant other, or your spouse your plans to keep it short and tight and stick to it. You don't need to apologize or make excuses as to why you need to leave early, just come in and let the host know, it's going to be a short night and leave when the going gets tough.
7. Take some me time
This is one of the few opportunities you may have to be off from work, to maybe send the kids away for a vacation, to relax, and you should take advantage. Why be stressed out the entire time, when you can instead opt for some me time. Don't answer your phone, don't answer any emails, just relax and have a good time doing what you want to do, avoiding your family woes altogether.
8. Suck it up for a few hours
Let's be real, if you're lucky, those horrible relatives are only going to be in your face and at your place for a short time. Tell yourself repeatedly, it's just for a few hours/days and then keep telling yourself that when you get stressed. Hopefully, you don't have to see them but one or two times a year, and then you have all the rest to not have to think about them.
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