To start, my life hasn't really been the same these past 2-3 years. The same can be said for my sister. Long story short, my mom died, my dad remarried, and we now have a stepfamily. However, we don't really like our new stepfamily. Along with this, my dads personality has negatively changed ever since all this. There's just times where I don't even feel like he's the same person anymore.
The environment just isn't ideal to us. So because of this, my sister plans on moving out in two days. And by moving out, I mean she's literally going to "run away" from home....
She has been planning this out for a while now. It all started when she met her current boyfriend online. Apparently, her boyfriend isn't happy with the current state of his family either. He basically offered for the two of them to "run away" together. My sister caught on to the idea. While I'm sure my sister has thought of moving out for a while now, nothing was ever really as serious as it is now.
However, something about her boyfriend just seems sort of fishy to me. To start, he's significantly older than her (around 17ish years I think). Also, they have indeed gotten in arguments already a few times. Another strange factor is the fact that they met online. I know he's a real person (they've seen each other in real life a few times) but still, something about him seems kinda unsettling to me.
So anyways, my sister got a job a few months ago. And she did so in order to make sure she would have enough money for everything when she leaves. Plus, she kinda just needed a job anyways considering her age. Along with this, everything else has already been established, such as where she's gonna live, her car, her job, etc.
Nobody in the family knows about her leaving except me. The only other person who knows is a close family friend of ours, and the three of us have made it clear that its a secret between us. In fact, my family doesn't even know that she has a boyfriend who she met online, let alone the fact that he's a lot older than her...
While my dad and stepmom have been starting to improve their personalities recently, it was already too late. My sister is still pretty keen on her leaving in two days. I suppose it would just be foolish of her to call everything off when it was only two days away, and I can only imagine how upset her boyfriend would be.
The idea of her moving out isn't really what bothers me. Instead, its the way that its being done. Running away from home is a lot different than lets say, leaving for college or university. I honestly just don't know why she would have chosen this route. I just feel like there were better ways to move out than just run away.
She told me that she would leave a few notes behind for our family to see, one for my dad and one for my stepmom, basically just thanking them for everything. She told me that despite all turmoil that ever happened, that she would still be ok with having a relationship with them as long as they felt the same. My sister also said that she would call my dad a few days afterwards, and basically just tell him everything. She even pointed out to me that if things don't work out within the first 11 months (that's how long she's renting her future house for) that she would be ok with potentially moving back to our home and starting life here all over again. Although, it would have to depend on our parents and if they would be ok with still having a relationship with her
My sister told me that she might buy a little trinket or something for our young stepsister since her birthday is relatively soon, just as a goodbye note. She said that despite both of us not liking our two younger stepsiblings (a boy and a girl), that there shouldn't be any bad blood between us and them in the future, and that we honestly have no clue what they're gonna think of us when they grow up.
Of course, once my family comes home from where they're currently staying, they will obviously start asking me a bunch of questions regarding her absence. My sister told me to tell them that everything will be on the note, but that still doesn't seem right to me for some reason. I feel like my dad will do everything he can to try to get her to move back. Can you yourself imagine coming home one day to find out one of your kids ran away from home?
Like I've said before, this whole thing does not seem right to me. However, there is literally nothing I can do about it. Every single thing has already been planned. Legally, she can do whatever she wants since she is over the age of 18, but just because you CAN do something does not mean you SHOULD do something.
So yeah, I'm at a loss of words right now. I can only imagine the amount of pain I'll get tomorrow when I see a U-Haul pulling in to our driveway tomorrow....
I really just don't know what to do. There's probably nothing I even can do. What are your thoughts on all this? What would you do if you were me?
Emotionally, it deeply hurt me to write all this...
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1Opinion
Does she know where she's headed?
Yes, she does
So, has this phase passed or she still feels this way? I don't know a thing about your (step) folks, but telling them can't hurt. I mean, these things should be discussed thoroughly, it's not a movie where everything goes according to script, but she's probably too young to live on her own (or with as equally young boyfriend).
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