Nothing Is Built To Last Forever
I start with a heading that literally quotes a line from the song "21 Guns" by Green Day because it's one of the lines that have always stuck with me. Even if it's not necessarily very profound, and nothing from out of this world, it does say a lot about what life is all about.
Change is within us and around us everywhere. Expressions of the what we really are constantly transform and turn into something new.
The attachment to people, thoughts, and things, hinder you from evolving. That's one of the reasons why addictions (both to substance and behavior) are seen as so unhealthy. Homeostasis is a line that is drawn from your habits and routines, among which, are addictions.
This is closely connected to the illusion of controling everything. This does not mean that there aren't instances where decisions can be made on rational grounds. This does, however, mean that control of variables that you can't possibly perceive, is futile, to say the least. This is very important to note. The problem with control, is when we try to control other people, things, and other forms of exterior variables. This becomes blinding because of what it is covering up. It's covering up the only thing we can control: our own thoughts and reactions to what the exterior world deals us.
Development has been given many different definitions and conotations throughout history. In this specific case, I am referring to cognitive, emotional, moral and social development. This is the development that developmental psychology is concerned about. Development, as a concept, is defined in this text as:
"The deconstruction of a structure defined by a specific level of consciousness and the reconstruction of a new one, at a new level of consciousness."
The key point to focus on here is that it requires to deconstruct the prior structure, before constructing the next. This is important but why? Because of the next point I have to make:
You Are A Combination of the Five People you Spend Most Time With
The heading above is taken from a quote I heard somewhere. Wether it's true to the letter, is of course questionable. If it's five or ten people, no one can really tell and what "spending time with" entails, is also an incertainty that we will just have to take into consideration.
For the sake of simplicity and keeping this least academic as possible and more relatable to the reader, I will define "spending time with", as "interacting with". Of course, this includes verbal and non-verbal communication.
In connection to the previous heading, when concerning moving forward in one's development, it is crucial that we learn how to let go. Letting go of people, things, feelings and thoughts. Why? Because of many reasons, but the ones I think are most significant:
1. Holding on takes up energy that you could perhaps invest in a more constructive manner.
2. Life is change, and change implies that you change what you are holding on to.
3. The people you hold on to, shape your habits.
Letting go of people in your life is something that is part of growing up. If you never lost a single friend since childhood, do you you think you'd ever make new friends? Growing a part is something that is a sign of change in values, interests, orientations, tendencies, tastes. This does not mean that commitment is something that is absurd. Commitment is also a part of life. Integrity is also. But, interestingly enough, commitment can be linked closely to the concept of connection, rather than addiction, if we look back at the start of this MyTake.
I hope this reaches who needs to hear this. We are all transforming constantly. And perhaps, if I may say, you could consider yourself somehow different after reading this.