Overprotective Brother?

[amazingperson1]

I have some issues with my older brother.
He's very protective of me. Let me introduce my self first :D.
My name is Kayla and I'm 14 years old. I go to a normal Junior High School in an unusual city. I have two brothers. My 12-year-old younger brother David. And my 19-year-old older brother James how is protective. My brother David isn't protective at all he just likes to joke aroundallot. The overprotectiveness started when I was 12 years old. When I go to party's for examples he tells me not to wear dresses etc. But I just snuck some out hehe XD. He tells me only wear covered things etc which is weird. He calls me before and after school 7 times a day. It's stressful. If I don't pick up the phone he will tell mom on me. One time I had a boy over. ( For a science project".) We were working on the science project in my room. But my brothers ( Both of them ). Watched us like a spy lmao. His mom called him because she was waiting for him outside. Kian ( My classmate hugged me ). IN FRONT OF MY BROTHERS... Then all of the sudden we had a talk. He said, " I don't think this is good alright". " I hate this". "Stop talking to you're male classmates"."Stop being an idiot. "I will beat him up. My best friend had a HUGE party last year. And my brothers decided to come. To pick me up.( Even my crush was there ). I didn't know. My brother just slapped me and pulls me to the door. People just stared at me i was totally embarrassed.( I was wearing a tight dress. ) I got grounded by my OWN BROTHER. For going to a party and wearing a tight dress. Notice: I told my mum lmao that I was going to a party. Everyone at school know's to not mess with me otherwise my brother will come for them. It's suck. People don't even joke with me. People have dissed me because of my brotherly rumor. I get judged and hate. It's suck. I just want my brother to tone it down. Is that too much to ask for. What should I do? Help me please...

[the1andonlyvan]

Ok i get what you want to do. But im not sure you get what your brother is trying to do even if he is going a bit outside the norm. Im 36 so I've seen a lot more and have a diffrent prospective. He doesn't want you to get hurt or taken advantage of. There are people out there young and old that will see you as a sex object which is also his objection to the tight clothing and dresses. With that with the partys etc he is probably worried that you will get drunk or high (im not judging here) but in that state in skimpy or revealing cloths, he is worried someone will force themselves on you or worse take what they want by force. He may also be worried about your future and your reputation doesn't want you to get pregnant and be the "school slut". I do agree that he should tone it down a little maybe sit down with him and talk to him. He cares about you and is trying to look out for you. Maybe you can convince him that you understand why he is worried and reach an understanding. Maybe agree to have a sort of a 911 code if you dont feel right about a situation you will texted him lets say surprise in a sentance. That would tell him to call or come get you. Also remember he was a guy your age not long ago and knows how and what they think.

[amazingperson1]

:) Yeah i will try to understand him more.

[OlderAndWiser]

Why do your parents allow your brother to serve as a substitute parent for you?

[BeautifullyCurious]

Its also maybe because you are 14! I'm not trying to be rude or judge or anything.. but if my sister was going to parties wearing tight dresses at 14.. My parents would flip. Maybe just ask him to tone it down, but you also have to do the same in order to earn some trust from your brother.. That way he won't be as controlling or over protective..

[amazingperson1]

I know i normally don't wear tight clothing at all. It was jsut beacuse of my bestfriends party.

[Anonymous]

This is too much you might not want to see it but your brother is abusing you. you have to talk to your mum and get him out of your life this is abuse it's not ok. he extreme measure would be to get a restraining order and it may have to go there but first talk to your mum and sit hi down in front of your mum or parents let him know what he is doing is not ok.

[raton21]

Talk to him nicely about it. Ask him if he can give more free space. But first he has to trust you first.