And guys would you watch your baby being born?
Is birth gross?
And guys would you watch your baby being born?
Not at all. I was there for the birth of all three of my children and I would not have missed it for the world. I write as part of my living and I don't even now think I can find the words to describe it.
There was the heroism - and it is nothing less - of seeing my girlfriend in labor. It was pain and struggle and in the midst of all of that, as I watched and briefly held her hand and never felt more helpless and useless in all my life, she looked at me and smiled and said just three words - "I love you."
The whole world brightened. This beautiful woman had given her body to me and was giving me this beautiful gift. My part had been small and nothing but pleasure and yet my girlfriend loves me! I was over the moon!! I have never felt more loved and wanted - an unconditional love that so few will ever be lucky enough to know.
Then there was that moment when you hear your baby cry for the first time. Ten thousand thoughts run through your head all at once. I wanted to kiss my girlfriend to thank her and tell her I love her and how wonderful she had been. She gave me this beautiful gift and I can never love her enough to even begin to repay her how she has made me feel. I wanted to protect her and make sure she was safe and comfortable.
At the same time I found myself cutting the cord. My little teeny-tiny bit in something so huge. My little contribution to the future and I felt so proud.
Then, seeing my girlfriend and my baby together and, the tears running down my cheeks, all I could think was, "I would do anything for you. I would throw myself in front of a train for you. I need you both so much and I will always be there for you and never leave you!!"
My girlfriend and I have had three children together - and sadly one miscarriage - and each time I felt the same. It never changed. It all runs together in my brain and yet it never changes. I feel love, I feel proud, I feel like a man and at the same time a helpless boy filled with excitement and - not to be too cliche - wonder.
Ya know what? Truly, if you look at it, yes, it is a mess. Not pretty - and you'll never notice it. You won't care and it won't matter. I can only speak to it from a father's side. The pride and the unconditional happiness and love. I never felt more like a man, more like my life mattered and that I would protect and love my girlfriend and my baby and that I would do anything and give my life for them, then when I saw my children born.
Gross? Nope, it really is a miracle.
Wow. Well-said!
You are very fortunate!
It's good to hear that there are some things that make this a better place. We are surrounded by so much darkness and so many idiots. It can be hard to forget that, but this experience is definitely something that can put this world in balance again.
@Guardian45 You know, I know it must sound so cliche, but so long as my girlfriend and my three little munchkins are in my life, it all seems bearable. The world is bright because they are in it.
Alistair Cooke put it perfectly and I never forget it, “In the best of times, our days are numbered anyway. So it would be a crime against nature for any generation to take the world crisis so solemnly that it put off enjoying those things for which we were designed in the first place: the opportunity to do good work, to enjoy friends, to fall in love, to hit a ball, and to bounce a baby on our knee."
Better words have not been said!
This is so beautiful! Best wishes to you and your family!
@SpiderLady Thank you so much. As I say, I am the luckiest guy on the planet and I have been given more than I ever deserved.
I was there for all 4 of my beautiful babies being born, everything leading up to the birth is (often) slow and it can be quite tedious in the wait. Yeah the birth is messy and gross but guess what? That beautiful sound of hearing your child cry for the first time is an amazing feeling, even the mother who has been through all the pain just forgets it all in that moment because it's so joyful! I remember after an awful birth of my oldest son that lasted days (I'm not exaggerating) when he started crying I remember thinking wow! That's our baby and he's alive and well! 😍😍
I don't think it's gross. Shocking maybe, scary even, but not gross. It's a beautiful process that I've yet to witness and experience myself.
If I ever have children I want to have a water birth, which is said to be much more relaxing for both baby and mother. I would love for my SO (if I care about him) to be right there beside me, offering his support and comfort. He doesn't have to get in the water with me (even though I would love that), but I'd like for him to be close. I'd like for him to experience the joy of seeing his child enter the world.
There was a video of a water birth on IG (I posted a screenie) and this would be my ideal scene if I could ask for one. You should look for the video, it's so beautiful 😭.
You had a water birth?
I definitely don't think it's for everyone. However, personally, being in water is already therapeutic for me. Whether it's in the shower or in the pool, I find being submerged in water instantly gratifying. Which is why I'd like to try the water birth.
Hmm, I see.
There have been some cases of bacterial contamination from the birthing pools. I do wish I had a shower or something in my room so I could put warm water on my body to relax and I would have changed the position I was trying to give birth in. I think they have better birthing beds now where gravity helps the process.
Gross is a luxury. If you’re being chased by a lion, you don’t care if you step in scat as you run away. If someone is bleeding out in front of you, you put pressure on the wound, even if you get blood on your hands. Gross is a luxury of time and a lack of urgency, so labor is only as gross as it is easy. But if you’re wife is screaming bloody murder or the baby is coming bass ackwards or your running to get to the hospital on time, gross is not a luxury you have. You’re brain is not gonna give a crap.
True. Agreed. Interesting take!👍
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I find it both beautiful and gross.
"Gross" because I'm grossed out by any blood that is released painfully. Unlike many people (mainly men), I'm not hypocritically grossed out by birth whilst being fine with people getting their heads chopped off in movies. Any blood from something painful will disturb me.
However it's beautiful because of what is happening at the core of the event, beneath all that grossness. And I respect the women who go through it.
Regardless I would rather not see it, similar to how I would rather not see a heart surgery, even if it's wonderful because it saves a person's life.
Child birth is the most beautiful experience I have ever had, I was there when my son was born. I helped deliver him and cut the cord. The doctor was running late, and my son was not waiting any longer, the nurse there and I delivered him and at exactly 11:10 am, he flew out like a cannon! It looks quite painful for the mother but I was so amazed that all I could do is try to hold back the tears.
Impressive.
Whaaaaaat?
The word "bad ass" could be defined as: "Any woman who has the strength" to deliver her own baby". Dang girl, you are tough!!
No matter what anyone says, I think it looks gross and probably smells bad as well. Now, despite this, I think if you look or think beyond this as just a purely sensory experience in the moment, you might find that birth is very beautiful. If you think outside of the medical personnel scrambling everywhere and talking/yelling, your wife yelling, the blood everywhere and other fluids, your son/daughter crying, the smell, etc. then you can appreciate the moment for being a valuable point in you and your spouse’s life. I would want be there and witness my child being born as I think there is some biological inclination for me wanting this and because I want to support my wife by being there in-person with her. As a father, I just feel that it is required of you, morally, to be present while you and your wife’s child is being born. I don’t think I’d feel particularly good or right about not experiencing this moment, again, probably biological imperative/inclination.
Being a firefighter paramedic, I've assisted in 14 births. It's beautiful seeing a human life enter the world.
My wife has had two daughters, and I've seen it all. There's a lot of liquids, and when the baby comes out, it's not that cute bundle of joy that you see a month later, but a wrinkled slime covered old man. They weigh and measure the baby, and clean it all up before giving it back to you. That's when the bonding starts. You forget about all the slime, and you're holding a small helpless person who looks up at you. That melts your heart.
I view it as gross but (before anyone gets triggered) that doesn't mean I think it doesn't have its place in the world. From the erspective of a human, it clearly plays an important role in our survival.
I think the reason some people don't view it as gross is that they're mainly thinking about the process behind it all. The concepts that give it meaning. But I'll tell you one thing! If people didn't know how babies were born and were showed a close-up video of a woman giving birth, there wouldn't be smiles on their faces. 😂
As a future obstetrician I have attended several births, both caesarean and vaginal. I can say that some things about birth might be gross, but not the delivery itself.
Birth involves 3 stages. The delivery of the baby is the most amazing one.
However it is not something all men can watch. There were several times were the fathers to be were more anxious than the women in labour and we also had a couple of them fainting from emotional stress, even without being in the delivery room. I am not criticising here. Just pointing out that while some men can be there and be supportive and all, some other can't. So you shouldn't be resentful to your guy if he says that he doesn't want to be there.
It’s pretty gross... I mean having your baby thrown onto your chest afterwards is nothing short of euphoric but it’s not an experience I found “beautiful”... just the outcome of it is 😊
I was happy for my hubby to stay away from the business end, and he likened seeing the baby come out to watching his favourite pub burn down so we were pretty much on the same page 😜
Could be worse ^^
Its natural and beautiful. And yes, I'd be involved in the birth of my child
Having your vagina open up to the size of a bowling ball does sound extremely painful and gross tbh. But after all that pain, being able to hold your baby that YOU created for the first time makes it the most beautiful and mesmerizing thing anyone can experience.
No, it is not gross, it's part of the human nature and it have been happening since the beginning of the human history, so it's a normal thing. And i like to know everything about the human body in physiology, anatomy and even how people think, so it's beautiful to watch the first seconds in the human life and remember that we were just like this baby when we first got to this world. It's like watching our memories back.
I would watch my baby being born if i got married. It would be the most heart-touching moments in my life to see the first moments of my son's/daughter's life, a part of my DNA, a part of me, getting alive for its first time. Those feeling would make me cry happily. It's just the feelings of the fatherhood, you can't describe those feeling by words.
It really depends on how you look at the situation. like physically birth can be a bit gross because it’s just a lot of pain and body fluids and weird stuff, but birth is still so amazing and should be talked about/shown more because it’s really an amazing thing. if someone is so immature that they
I disagree
I think the process of giving life is scary. Therefore, I give praise to all mothers that were women enough to go through it. Is it gross? Maybe maybe not... I do know I'll never be the one to do it ever. Goodluck to other women who do
Mi never want to have a baby. Giving birth looks painful and I would probably pass out. Lol
The nurses put a full length mirror in front of me so I could see my daughter's head. I could see the top of her hair come out then go back in and then out again. It was a bit frustrating. I don't remember seeing anything gooky maybe her head was wet but I didn't see the entire birth process. Maybe I blocked the blood part from my brain.
Its messed up- it's not pretty.
it's a miracle of life but its not neat. So is it gross as in the physical context yes a bit- there a fluid coming out of everywhere and a lot of pain everywhere.
But you mean gross as in pregnancy? No pregnancy and birth are natural phenomena and are the most amazing things in the world.
I feel like it'll be a revelation more than anything else of how we're all just part of a cycle. It's definitely gonna be surreal, and i will see vaginas very differently😂
It's messy, but it's a beautiful experience. I would fear for the sanity of somebody who finds surgery "beautiful". Birth is natural. It can be a blessed time or a tragic time of something goes wrong for mother and child.
I'm so damn fascinated by the world that I probably wouldn't even notice the blood and gore. I'd be too busy measuring with a ruler or testing whether I can stick a hose up my wife's booty and shoot the baby out with compressed air or something.
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