Why is it difficult to make friends in the modern era?

Question

It seems as though a lot of people are glued to technology and don't wanna go out and see other people? Am I the only one concerned about this? Or is it a misunderstanding?

Greedier · Accepted Answer

Probably cos of technology. As we spend so much time just on our phones and to ourselves, looking directly at other people's face gets already harder. Let alone socialise lol.

But I'm really grateful to technology.
I think technology is crucial, without it we wouldn't even be able to be using GAG right now.

Browsers have turned into an essential tool nowadays, without it we'd need to spend ages in libraries turning pages just to find one answer.

Nowadays, depending on the company you work for and in what's your field, you can even work from home! That's amazing.

Technology has brought (and is bringing) innovation, flexibility and making everything easier for us in a nutshell.

Oh, ofc. And nothing of this would be possible without network/internet.

So, nowadays we're dependent on technology. There's no point in running away from it, this is the present and future.

What's probably making people stop socialising, is the lack of time management and self control. (which is also my case by the way)

Technology's an indispensable tool, but it has its drawbacks as well ofc.

The thing is that nowadays we can almost do anything online (we can make friends online, we can buy online, we can play online, we can read online, find our answers, study, watch international videos, put on a headset and get emersed in another world, etc) , so we become accommodated cos of all these privileges.

We start to underestimate the importance of socialising face to face. We start getting more and more kept to ourselves...
And eventually, this disrupts a lot of things in our life.

I, for example, have problems with presenting a presentation in front of class now.

And that's probably cos I spend more time on my phone than talking to other people.

So, what can we take away from it?

"It's all about knowing how to manage your time properly and setting limits of screen time."

That's something that I need to apply in my life as well.

Bellona · Accepted Answer

It is difficult to make friends today because of our lifestyles. For many generations in the western world, it was common for adults to meet at balls, perfect for meeting many people, friends and partners. Up until the late 1960s balls were events everyone wanted to go to. With the rise of education, people developed their own passions and interests, finding clubs and associations relating to their interests. The birth of teenagers in the 1960s made these young groups of people not have 'traditional balls,' and rebellion was on a rise. Education and teenagers prevented people from the 60s from meeting more people and different types of people which means the chance to find friends decreases, especially for those who are not socially involved. Today I don't know how many people are in clubs that are of their interest but they are a great place to find friends as adults, churches, ethnic clubs, chess and so on.

zeitgeist057 · Accepted Answer

You're right, they are glued to their tech. Phones, laptops, tvs. Reddit, instagram, TikTok, Facebook, YouTube, Netflix, &c.

Socializing is a skill. I used to socialize all the time with friends, never watched tv, it was before the internet and we would hang out and talk, have a drink, bbq, go for a walk, play games, just live life. People interacted and I would see some cute girl who thought I was cute too and we would start flirting and see each other here and there and maybe build a relationship or not. Just circles of social interaction, I remember going to parties hoping the girl I was crushing on would be there, and then turns out I find out from her later after we start dating she was thinking and hoping the same thing.

Why is it difficult to make friends in the modern era?

But these days, people just opt to stay in, on their screen, don't interact, and if you see them in public and try to interact with them they freak out and get scared because they never talk to anyone other than maybe some family and friends, they don't let new people into their circle. Also a lot of fear mongering from posts where you see people fighting, hurting each other, posts about murder, rape, violence, then people start to believe this is around every corner and every stranger is trying to hurt them.

I also remember when computers and internet first came out and I experienced being on a computer for hours at a time, how weird it was to talk to someone after. I had to get my fuzzy brain wrapped around human interaction. But now that's a constant state for most people, they spend more time interacting with their screens than with humans.

RealMarek · Accepted Answer

Western elites want people to be mobile, spend their prime years getting credentials, working long hours in marginally paying jobs to keep up with debt, addicted to entertainment and porn, and hooked on social media. What they do not want are stable, healthy communities with easily maintained real relationships. Strong communities are difficult to exploit and control. Our elites are rotten. Clear them out!

Anonymous · Answer

I think that’s only in the US
Because life here is slave mentality.
We are victims of debt and hard work to work for someone else and make the richer while you can’t even pay your rent properly. So that puts Americans into a slave mode and unhappiness starting at +18. So obviously this will make life hard and your happiness is dead and your focus now is to survive. So survival mode.
In Europe for example people work hard , very hard. But they know how to treat themselves well and communicate. Also schools lifestyle there is cheaper. And someone who’s 18+ Can still stay at home with parents too if they like ! Nothing wrong with this at all. So this is a + because they can now save money.
I find it very strange ofc with American parents in saying oh my kid is 23 and lives at home “rolling their eyes”. I’m like.. oh so when you grow old you want your kid to drive your at nursing home then. Create gentle generations peeps. Let that soul leave the house when he or she is truly ready.
I can give an example ,
Why do you think I’m general Jewish family are rich , well educated , happy , family oriented ? Jewish Families stay connected and together. That way also their Communities grow healthy and connected too. And so EASY to make friends.
That’s the same for my country too. I don’t want to
Mention what country I’m from
~ but quite similar to Jewish dynamics when it comes to family , etc.

Yes I know IT plays a role too iPhones etc but I think this is why… it’s difficult to make friends.

BlueScorpio · Answer

Social media, people rather talk online than in person cause it's easier to flake or walk out conversation at any time. Also people have their own thing going on, so it's harder to meet up and talk when you have a full schedule. If you work everyday, most the week, sometimes your just to drain to talk or hang out with anyone.

Charlesbrandonf · Answer

Life is just going fast. People are always in perceive of something in a rush. If everyone is willing to be social it’s a different story. Everyone is independent, organised, designing their day to day life to to their liking. If we want friends we must put ourself outside. A lot of people are like doing their own life and expect people to walk over to us and becomes friends.

Pinay_ako · Answer

I am old fashioned. I still prefer to meet up in person and hang out. Even for coffee or lunch. Even just chilling at home, cooking and watch movies 😂 or just catch up. But life gets busy and people move. But I still keep in touch with my friends overseas regardless. When we do meet up, we make it worth the while. Lots of laughs and pictures!

art84 · Answer

I never had friends just acquaintances in the 1990's through 2008. As I gotten older in my late 20's and 30's, the so call friends I knew had gotten married and had children. Though when I was younger it was easier to make friends in school even church when you had the time to meet people and send 2 hours or more with them. I can look up people online and chat with them cause I don't have their numbers and it's easier than face to face meeting.

Raphaëlle · Answer

You can get friends online but a lot of people aren't who they really are online. Like someone else said I prefer to meet up with people face to face and do things together. You can keep in contact online but spend a lot more quality time together if you meet up.

SunsetBeautyxxxx · Answer

It's not that I can't make friends, its that I'm comfortable just going up to people and talking to them if they talk to me first and decide they want to be my friend, than I put in all efforts to make a great relationship with them

TallAnon · Answer

If there's 5 people your age, you gonna have to like em and you're gonna have to marry one. If there's 100.000 people, you can punch 10, fuck and ghost 20 and there's 99.970 left. People disregard others a lot now because there's so many others. For example, in 3 years living in this city I have seen one of my neighbours, once. In historic eras, you'll be farming with them, hunting with them or dying with them.

RonStone45 · Answer

Because politics play a bigger factor today than it used to. Lost friends over my opinion on covid.

misfittoy · Answer

because a lot of people are fake, jealous and only out to get what they can but there are some good people out there, hard to find but we are there

Haha456 · Answer

it is difficult to make friends because adults typically don't care enough to make friends and also due to the fact people tend to get pickier with who they want to befriend as they get older.

HorrorFan · Answer

Social media leading to lack of social skills. Ease of access to internet-based entertainment making staying home easy enough of an option. Also no one can afford anything.

Steamnir · Answer

Because people are staying at their homes and have self enjoyable activities so the need for others are less and less everyday

exitseven · Answer

Nope, Maggie Jackson writes in her book "Distracted" that people have thousands of Facebook friends and not on single friend they can talk to about important life issues.

MCheetah · Answer

People have always been flaky. Social media has just made them ten times more flaky.

dustybiker · Answer

Just treat people decently. Remember what they like, you’re halfway there.

faithgrace4u · Answer

A lot of people are stuck up these days just make sure you seem nice ans maybe they will

Bethany22 · Answer

Maybe their parents are lest strict about them making friends than they used to be.

Nsync · Answer

People these days are struggling to cope with anxiety and depression, it seems to be on an increase. It is so difficult to guage people and the intentions. It's like nobody wants to give but want to take

DancingQueen16 · Answer

I guess it's because making friends was a lot easier when we were younger

AsaKyo · Answer

No one really cares about having meaningful relationships anymore

TheSpaceGnome · Answer

The type of people I want to make friends with are the ones who are glued to technology.

Anonymous · Answer

Because people like @prettypriya act like Nazi’s online 🤷🏻‍♂️

ZenJen444 · Answer

Because people have become crazier. So now people are more cautious as to who they allow in their space.

Iron_Man · Answer

It’s much easier to stay at home then go on and actually do something very disappointing

LimitedBenefits101 · Answer

Don't you already have friends? you're 25...

OnlinePeanut22 · Answer

Too many sheep following each other. I also has be very difficult to make friends.

Anonymous · Answer

Most people don't want friends. They want fans.

Jennz6 · Answer

Social media is why

LavLavLuv · Answer

some are just stuck up and lame

18Uma21 · Answer

I was thinking the same recently

BlurryHaze · Answer

It's definitely noticeable in this era.

fonduegirl · Answer

Fake people

Anony3942 · Answer

YES YES AND HELL YES

Joker_ · Answer

technology

Why is it difficult to make friends in the modern era?

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