Should I tell my sister to being them food/snacks?

[Anonymous]

My sister has been bringing my two nieces over to my place since my mom takes care of them while they are on break from school. My mom rarely cooks unless they come over. I have a small pile of organic meat that I like to keep in my freezer but every time they come over she uses my food to cook for them. Should I ask my sister to bring them snacks and food? Does this sound mean to ask her to do so? She doesn’t buy organic meat and my mom uses my food to cook for them every time they come over and my nieces eat a lot. They go through the sour cream container so fast. Anyone been in this situation

Updates

1 y

To bring**

[HollyK21]

Sounds more like you should be talking to your mom about not giving the kids your food.

[Asker]

She feels hurt when I say that but my mom lives with me and doesn’t work, I pay all the bills. I think my sister needs to start bringing then food

[HollyK21]

Speaking with your sister is just avoiding the main issue and also placing her in the middle of something when she didn’t ask for that.

To elaborate on both points, the fact that you asked her to bring food would definitely come up in conversation, because your mom would obviously be curious why she’s suddenly packing their lunches, and you plop your sister right in the middle because she will have to explain. On top of that, your mom may not understand that you have a “problem” and still offer your organic food. There’s nothing to stop your sister from packing some enchilada that need sour cream or forgetting something that your mom would fill in. Our mom may even insist on making them food, like you just don’t know what scenarios would pop up that could’ve been avoided with a simple conversation.

And before you ask, yes I am telling you all this from experience! I’d never suggest anything I wouldn’t do or haven’t done myself. Respect your mom enough to have a conversation rather than worrying about hurting her feelings, because your efforts to avoid that conversation may inadvertently hurt her feelings anyway.