No idea how to move past this argument. Ant suggestions?

[Anonymous]

Me and my boyfriend had a fight this weekend. I got angry about something and he did not feel like I should have been angry.

We have a baby. Another kid we are related to wanted to hold our baby as usual. Normally I say ok. But the things is, our baby is getting older now and is at a very active stage and is heavier. I no longer feel very comfortable with this kid holding the baby. We had both agreed on this previously. Well, this weekend when the kid asked, I said no. My boyfriend turned around and said yes. That made me really mad. I left the room. When he came later to talk to me, he was so mad at me. I told him why it made me angry. He denied us agreeing that. He said if we were there the kid could hold the baby and I was ridiculous for getting angry at a child. This kid is not 2 or 3. They are old enough to understand.

He will not let it rest. I have tried to talk about it but every time I do, he gets mad at me again. He told me last night he didn't care about how I felt or what I thought. This morning I tried again. I apologized again and tried to explain things. He just said things keep happening so why let it go?

We do not fight often. Our last argument was a month ago and it was over within a night. He acts like we fight daily or something.

I am very hurt by some of the comments he made to me and I am extremely offended he keeps telling me how bad I am for getting angry at a child.

Even more frustrating? HE yells at OUR BABY. When the baby cries a lot, he gets downright ticked. He raises his voice. He scolds the baby. He tells the baby they are fake crying. He leaves the baby lay and scream and says they can just throw a fit then. Yet I'M wrong for being mad that he let a kid hold our baby when I said no?

I'm really sad and can't believe he won't let this go and just move on. He said yesterday he was over it but clearly he isn't.

I feel awful and I just want this to be over.

[Valdemort]

The suggestion is: get away from this guy.
You two sound toxic as fuck and a baby really shouldn't be in such an environment.

[Asker]

How am I toxic? He yells at our baby but I can't be unhappy that an entitled kid got their way? I say no, he says yes. That kind of made me feel like he was saying my opinion didn't matter and he made the rules.

[Valdemort]

I'm saying you two together in a relationship sound toxic. It's not a healthy environment for a child to grow up in.

[Asker]

I understand that. It really hurts me when he does this. And telling at our baby is so wrong. But he wants to make me out to be a bad guy for getting mad at this kid?

[Valdemort]

As I can only base my answer on your perspective, I agree with you. But there's not a lot you can do if he doesn't wanna communicate about it, which, in itself, should tell you a lot.

[Asker]

It makes me really sad. I have tried. I have apologized. I have made compromise attempts. It's sad he just stews and lets stuff like this hang on. There's no need for it. Usually we resolve a disagreement easily.