My Male friend is distancing himself because of a difference in opinion, but I think it's because his girlfriend is intimidated by our friendship?

[Anonymous]

Quick summary: I became very close friends with a work colleague, at the start I told him I am nervous to be friends with someone I work with because if something happens at work, it could get very awkward, especially in my case because his boss is my brother and this is a family business. We got so close that I thought there is feelings but we worked through it and the basis is that we work together so we can only be friends.

Fast forward 5 months, he has a girlfriend now and I met her, he told her I am an important friend and I do respect there privacy and don't over message or bother him when he is at home, however, we chatted every day, weather at work or on message. Now suddenly since she is in his life, he is complaining that work hours are too hectic and he does not have time for his personal life and since this he has stopped talking to me because he says it is my family and I won't understand.

I am upset because the thing I was scared of happened now, but cannot help think its because he has more pressure to be at home because he has a girlfriend. I tried talking to him but he just wants to carry on as normal, but things are anything but normal.

[ManOnFire]

It's very possible that his girlfriend is having some influence on that, yes. Lots of people let their partners control them out of jealousy and possessiveness, and men are worse about this than women if she is friends with a guy, telling her not to be talking to him anymore. But any time a person will let their partner dictate them and who they can or can't talk to, then they are just as bad in my opinion.

But it could also be that he genuinely has grown closer to her than the job, and he feels a conflict with having to manage his commitment to the job. Or maybe he actually likes you more than her and he's frustrated because of that, but he wants to honor the relationship he has. Hard to say.

[Asker]

Thank you for your insightful reply, maybe it is as you said, he is drawing closer to her and now there is conflict to manage his commitment to work, which includes me.

[ManOnFire]

Best thing you can do is just kind of go No Contact. You can keep things polite at work, but don't try to put in much effort at talking or being friends like before. Eventually he may or may not wonder why, and if he cares enough he'll reach out or try to have a friendship with you.

[In_Trance]

So what's your question

[Asker]

I wanted feedback on if you thinks his sudden shift in communication is because of his partner because other than that I don't understand why , our friendship communication has been consistent for 8 months.

[In_Trance]

of course it is. Time for you to move on