Which parents do you think tend to be more controlling/domineering? Moms or dads?

[ManOnFire]

Or what has been the case in your own life right now or your upbringing? Who do you think tends to be controlling, moms or dads? Or did you experience it from both?

[Lesbologist]

Alright... so I've been bounced around from my Great Grandparents, to my Mom and step dad, and then to my aunt and uncle. When it came to controlling... I got to hand that to the women. Parental men tended to just try and help me, but become too forceful and guess why... that's right, she's in his ear and making him do it.

I think that sort of makes the case for the "controlling" factor... she even controls him.

Now when that wasn't in play... males were like my friend and just tried to help me. Not always, but I'm saying without that "influence" involved *the woman, they didn't have any ill will towards me.

So from my experience... the women were very manipulative, emotionally demanding and draining, and usually the start and stop of all the real problems. That's my experience from 3 different households.

I could add others like when I went into the foster care system... it's the same story. Usually always just a dude trying to keep a bitch happy. No direct ill will or manipulation tactics from the males... it was always the women.

[ManOnFire]

Yeah this definitely makes a lot of sense. Most dads that I see are also controlled by the wife like you noted, yeah.

[Anonymous]

My mom was by far way more controlling growing up. She claimed it was for my own good but in reality she was more worried about her own image. She would always be saying “people are going to think”. It about her. My well being came second.

This persisted into my adult hood which led to me not speaking to her for almost a decade. This really was my dad’s fault. Old school “the woman is never wrong” crap.

I finally confronted her one and one about this last year. She surprisingly acknowledged the criticism. Shocked me she finally admitted that she was wrong. We have a much better relationship now.

But female ego is insane. Many of them believe that admitting fault = admitting defeat. It can take them decades to finally take accountability (some never do).

[ManOnFire]

"She would always be saying “people are going to think”. It about her. My well being came second."
- Women have more social paranoia and fear what people think about them or their image much more than men do. I say this a lot. It's part of how they're visual about not just physical appearance but social appearance as well.

Great that she could finally admit it. A lot of people are still waiting.

[Opinion Owner]

You change the past but you can reconcile it. I am grateful to God I was able to have that conversation. She is my mother and I will always love and respect her.

But about the social paranoia that’s extremely true. Even the most “rebellious” women against social norms is still trying to please someone’s opinions (their toxic friends).

But there was a time in history that a woman’s reputation could have a drastic impact on her life. If she was rumored to be promiscuous she risked the opportunity to marry a wealthy / high value man. It’s one of the reasons criticism of promiscuity (back when shame existed) really cuts deep into a woman’s psyche. They get REALLY mad if they are called a slut.

But nowadays a lot of the paranoia of social reputation damage are unfounded. But women haven’t evolved out of it.

[Opinion Owner]

*can’t change the past

[Chazmatazz269]

100% women, being a parent is irrelevant.
Domestic abuse and intimate partner violence rates are highest in lesbian relationships, second highest in heterosexual relationships and lowest among homosexual men.
Furthermore, the majority of abusive relationships are mutually abusive. When the abuse is entirely one-sided, the abuser is female more often than male.
Controlling and domineering behavior is pervasive in abusive relationships. It’s one of the first signs of an abusive partner and it is often argued that controlling and domineering behavior is in fact abuse all on its own. They need never escalate to be considered abusive.
This is where pervasive double standards appear. If a woman is “only” controlling and domineering, then she’s just a “strong woman”. However, when a man is controlling and domineering, he’s abusive. This is the argument people use to suggest men are more abusive. They redefine abuse, depending upon the sex of the abuser and the sex of the victim.

[ManOnFire]

Wow good points.

[Princesscloud]

I think it really depends on the person rather than whether they’re a mom or dad. Moms can sometimes be more emotionally controlling because they worry about every little thing, while dads may be more strict about rules, independence, and making decisions. But honestly, both can be equally controlling in different ways. I think it comes down to their personality, upbringing, and how they were raised themselves. A good parent should guide you without making you feel like you have no freedom to live your own life.

[Nik1hil]

Moms.

You could have made a Poll.

[ManOnFire]

I avoid polls because most people will just vote instead of give thoughtful answers. Half of the voters are trolls and fakes anyway.

[Anonymous]

I think both can be controlling, but in different ways. Mothers sometimes tend to be more emotionally controlling because they're more involved in their children's everyday lives. They may use guilt, worry or emotional pressure to influence decisions. Fathers can sometimes be more authoritative and controlling through rules, discipline and expectations.

[Shiprex]

For me it was neither though my dad was much more severe if he had to deal with us behaving badly though that was seldom. Mum would tell us off but it would be done and dusted quickly

[ManOnFire]

Lucky guy. You had the right balance with your parents.

[Shiprex]

Thanks. They weren't heavy handed as they didn't need to be. We were brought up literally by the whole street and relatives beyond the immediate family

[NathanDavis]

other than the obvious parenting, none of them were controlling... I always had my space and choice for most things

[Anonymous]

My mom was much more controlling with me. I don't know about in general.

[ManOnFire]

I think many of us have that experience to some degree.

[queenofcardio]

My dad still tends to be

[molonski2]

Mother's without doubt , over the top helicopter..

[ChallahJewess]

fathers