In a stable upbringing, should both parents have authority?

[Anonymous]

There was a case of a rebellious teenaged 15 year-old son. The lady's husband unfortunately passed away in an accident and after several months, the child became out of control. He would tell his mother ''dad's not here anymore so therefore you can't do anything''.

When the father was alive, he wouldn't dare disrespect others nor his mother. However, the mother had no style at all and was super passive. So when the father died, he rebelled.

I find it wrong when only one parent has authority and the other is a pushover, all passive and does nothing. In a normal upbringing, shouldn't that kid's mother also have authority?

Updates

+1 y

Unfortunately there isn't any other male figures in the family to correct him. The deceased husband was an only child and the mother only has 2 sisters, brothers.

[SarahS98]

It was the opposite with me and my twin sisters. My mother was the strict one in the household meanwhile our father was the funny, softer parent. However, on the rare times he actually did the job he was effective at it too. He just didn't feel like dealing with it and prefer mom to do it.

[LazerBean]

Certainly.

[Asker]

Yeah. I hate when some women apply the ''wait till your father gets home'' approach and delegate all the role of discipline towards the father. Why wait till the father gets home when the mother can be the authority right there, immediately. Then what ends up happening, the child has 0 respect for the other parent when there should be equal respect.

[LazerBean]

I don't think it's bad as long as you do it right. In the worst of cases, or just whenever she didn't feel like dealing with it herself, my mother would pull out the "wait till your father gets home" thing. But she knew how to make a child behave all by herself if she wanted to, and she was actually quite well known for it.

[abc3643]

Yes, of course!