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My best friend's birthday is coming and I didn't get her anything. She got married this summer and I spoiled her with products she's been wanting for years, I know she hasn't gotten through all of them yet at this point.
Considering this and the fact we're going a little trip soon and I need to save up, I didn’t get her anything. She lives in a far city so we didn't get to see each other either. Do you think she could be hurt by this?
Updates
21 h
Forgot to add she's also tight on money, has been for a while. She didn't get me any gifts for my birthday either these last few years.
But she's used to receiving some from me so... I don't want her to think things changed now that she's married but she does live hours away so I can't even like offer to have lunch together on me
But she's used to receiving some from me so... I don't want her to think things changed now that she's married but she does live hours away so I can't even like offer to have lunch together on me
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
2Opinion
You could always do something simple, like a thoughtful card and some flowers, there’s stores where you can get a decent bouquet for around $11-$15. However I completely get where you’re coming from; personally I don’t have any expectations of anyone on my birthday and I certainly wouldn’t have one from a friend who’d just recently spent so much on me, like that’s more than enough. I guess I’m just throwing out a suggestion for if you do for whatever reason feel guilty for not getting her anything.
Per your update — WHAT? I wish you’d included that before because I would’ve said screw getting her any other gifts when she couldn’t even be bothered to get you anything for years now. You spoiled her recently, have a trip coming up, she absolutely better understand. I’d have zero guilt if I were you, a simple Happy Birthday MUST suffice.
You're easing my heart with your words thank you ❤️
No worries! One last thing — if she gives you a hard time whatsoever, then I genuinely hope it makes you reconsider your connection with her, because that is not a good friend. She may be “used to” you getting her a gift every year, but it would almost add insult to injury that you’ve historically always thought of her, yet she’s never considered you but has the audacity to be upset. It would have nothing to do with being newly married and everything to do with being a selfish, inconsiderate excuse of a “friend”.
You could tell her you want to gift her with time instead of money. Make her a list of favour coupons like, clean your house when you are busy, drop your kids off at school when your are on vacation, take care of their dog during their vacation, wash your car when you are on a budget etc…
Some will feel hurt. Most sane people wouldn't care.
If I were her I would understand. I suggest warning her that you need to save for the trip and aren't doing gifts for anyone this year.
If she's tight on money too, now is the perfect time to suggest the two of you permanently stop exchanging gifts.
Just send a nice card and explain that money is tight.
Just tell her now ahead of time and explain why, so she doesn’t have any expectations.
Yes she would... bad mistake!