Should I tell my girlfriend's husband she's having an affair?

[Anonymous]

So my girlfriend is cheating on her husband. Things have been bad between them for a few years now and yes, I know both parties share some blame in affairs.

I know my girlfriend's husband hasn't been there for her emotionally or sexually for awhile. He pulls away from her and they have sex every few months and she says it's usually after begging and then it's really fast. She has tried to talk to him and get him to come with her to couples counseling for years. They've been married for 6 years this summer.

So she randomly started flirting with this random guy a few months ago and they fooled around and ended up having sex. She told me the minute she got home and saw her husband she knew she wanted to try to work things out with him. She says she loves her husband, believes they are soul mates, but just needed to have sex. So I thought, well ok then, I don't need to step in.

Now she tells me she has met this OTHER man who is married with kids who tells her he and his wife have an open relationship (ha, yeah RIGHT! Don't believe that for 1 sec. unless you talk to the wife 1st!) So the other day he was at HER HOUSE and they fooled around on her couch...then they met in a hotel room another night and had sex. Now her husband is out of town for the day and he's coming to THEIR HOUSE again to have sex!

It's eating me up inside because I also love her husband. He is a good friend of mine and my husband's too. I told my friend I wouldn't say anything NOT because I am protecting her, but because I believe it would be WAY worse for her husband to find out via me and puts me in a bad position too!

So guys, what do you think is the right thing to do here? I'm literally nauseous over it!

[jacquesvol]

They are adults and should know what they are doing: if they ask you an advice, give it but don't volunteer anything, don't take initiatives. We are not here to judge her (or him) No-one will thank you if you comment or squeal.

[AJtogo]

Tough situation...and it would be best to stay out of it. What are you hoping to achieve by telling her husband?

[Asker]

Well not really hoping to need to tell him. I guess it's more selfish reasons on my part as it's making ME feel sad for him and it's weighing ME down. But I don't want to make the situation any worse and I don't want him to be hurt. So I'm hoping he will never find out and just live in bliss.

[AJtogo]

I think you already know that you need to stay out of this.....especially when knowing that it's for selfish reasons that you would tell. You also know that it will make a bad situation worse and, in my opinion, worse for you if you get dragged into it, which you would be because you're bringing it out into the open.

Sometimes we just have to do nothing when a situation really doesn't involve us.

[xxangel1990xx]

Keep out of it-if I were you I would not get involved. It's their lives and their business.

[ivarei]

that could become a HUGE mess. I'd stay out of it.

[The-Dude-Next-Door]

Tell your girlfriend to tell her husband herself or stop.

[crash0veride98]

It'll all come out sooner or later. just stay out of it. tell your friend that you don't wanna know what she's doing and just forget about it.

[Anonymous]

You know she having affair want to know if you should tell him
be honest you feel if you tell him you can fuck him
Been there done that