It seems like many people on GAG are very insecure and hopeless, so hopefully this will help you guys realize that you should be more confident in yourselves. I know I’m on the younger side of the age spectrum here, compared to most of GAG members, but I have had my fair share of insecurities and bad days, and have learned a lot about self esteem from my own experience.
I truly believe there is someone for everyone, and here’s why: After reading so many different people’s opinions on here about the male and female body, I have come to the conclusion that every person is going to be attractive to somebody. Even if there is an overwhelming majority for a certain attribute, there is still someone who prefers the other attribute(s). This can be regarding race, hair color, height, weight, body shape etc. etc. Additionally, there are some people who seem to have no preferences about certain physical characteristics, or they have a broad range of preferences. And although it seems like people on here rate models critically, they still seem to rate “normal” people highly. There have been many “How Do I Look?” posts where in my opinion, the person was <5/10, and yet they were rated >7/10. Beauty is so subjective, and it’s not worth your time to try to appear beautiful to everyone on the face of the earth, because that is physically impossible.
Here is a real-life example of what I am trying to get at: My two best friends and I cannot agree on which guys are hot, and which are not. Despite being best friends and having so much in common, we still have very, very different preferences for when it comes to guys. Whenever one of us sees an attractive guy or has a crush on one, the other two of us think he is absolutely ugly. So don’t get hung up if you’re not somebody’s “type”, because you for sure are someone else’s.
Also, I am sure each one of you can think of your own real-life example of this. Where someone who you think is ugly, is considered differently by their partner or even other people. Or maybe even the opposite, others think what you find attractive is ugly. It just all goes to show that someone finds you attractive.
Now I’m not saying you should give up taking care of your body, and become lazy, and wait for love to find you. I think it is important to stay healthy and take care of yourself and be at your set body weight. What that means is, some people are just simply meant to be a little skinnier, and others are meant to be a little fatter. I am supposed to be a little fatter, and that’s fine. I have tried for a few years now to slim down, with constant exercise and dieting, and sure, I have made a little progress, but I cannot get a flat stomach. Other people have the opposite problem, they are very skinny, and no matter how much they eat and work out, they cannot seem to bulk up. Now I am sure some of you are thinking, “well why can’t you just invest yourself more into the diet and workout?”. Well that’s because unless you get paid for being a fitness instructor or influencer, it doesn’t make sense for you to spend every waking moment at the gym. People have other priorities; jobs, school, kids, chores, friends, family etc. etc. And investing so much of yourself into reaching a certain number on the scale is unhealthy. It’s going to lead to either eating disorders, depression, losing friends (from only being at the gym and never wanting to go out to dinner and have fun), anxiety, stress, posting pictures for validation etc. etc. And also, why should you try so hard to look a certain way and to the extent where you are missing out on life and fun, when we have just discussed that everybody is good looking in their own way!
Also, regarding boobs and penis sizes….be confident with what you have! Girls, it seems like there is a 50/50 split between big and small boobs, and some guys like both. So again, there is no need to wish to be a certain size, because to at least half the guys think your boobs are perfect (and if you change the size, the percentage won’t change by much). Similarly, guys, stop worrying so much about penis length or girth size. I don’t know about other females, but personally, penises aren’t that visually attractive. They’re kind of ugly, regardless of size. Now don’t get me wrong, I am straight and into men, but for me, it’s the male body in its entirety that I care about. So if a girl wants to have sex with you (before she sees your penis), she already thinks you’re attractive or doesn’t care, and probably won’t be too focused on your penis. Sex is about experiencing pleasure, but also pleasing you’re partner. Using your dick to penetrate her vagina or ass isn’t the only way to please a girl. Some girls may have kinks or fetishes that you can use to your advantage or you can use your tongue, or toys. And honestly, it’s the same thing as with boobs. Some girls prefer bigger cocks, and some prefer smaller ones. Its all up to preference, and I promise, there is somebody out there who prefers your type of genitals.
So now that you know you have nothing to worry about physically, how can you get rid of insecurities? First, realize that everyone is self conscious. I do not believe there are people who would change nothing about their body if given the opportunity. So if you feel like people are judging you, take a moment and realize, that people are probably judging themselves more than you. Out in public, to strangers, you really aren’t that important. If you feel like everybody is noticing every single one of your flaws, you’re probably wrong, they probably don’t even notice you. Now this isn’t to say that you’re invisible or not special, but that people have their own insecurities that they are probably worrying about more. So try to keep that in the back of your head. Now I think the biggest thing is to fight all bad thoughts. It’s a mental battle, and honestly, a bit tough. Every time you think a bad thought, counterattack it with something positive. For example “Man, my face is so ugly-I have beautiful eyes”. It is going to help in the long run. I did this when I was at my lowest point, and it really helped a lot. Granted, it took a few years of training my mind to think differently, and I still have insecurities and times when I feel ugly, but I am doing better than I was 5 years ago. Even the most beautiful people do not realize their beauty, and are consequently, not confident. It’s all mental at this point, you have to tell yourself you’re beautiful to believe it. Fake it till you make it, right? Some of you think the way to achieve this confidence is by posting a “How Do I Look?” posts daily, and sorry to break it to you, but that won’t work. No matter how many people compliment you and say you are a 10/10, the only way you will truly believe it is if you train yourself to think that way.
So what if apparently you’re attractive…and yet seem to be unlikable. Well now here comes the difference between your physical characteristics (which you cannot change) and personality and hygiene (which can be changed). First of all, if you are immensely insecure, that may be what is scaring people off. It is very unattractive and very obvious. So take time to love yourself, before you expect anyone else to do it too. And here comes, what should be a no brainer. Be kind, honest, loyal, respectful etc. and that will make you likable. Also, shower, wear clean clothes, brush your teeth, wear deodorant. Take care of your hygiene. Not only is that easy and attractive, but it will also make you feel confident.
Lastly, I hope everyone realizes how much worth they have, and that there is really no reason to feel so hopeless and self-conscious. You are beautiful, you just need to see it and believe it!