So girls don't care about looks?

Question

Sounds too good to be true...

zombiefood · Accepted Answer

I hate having to argue this so many times.

Just because you have standards of what you like and don't like DOESN'T MAKE YOU SHALLOW. I mean good God. We all have things we like and don't like, and so long as you don't make fun of the people you don't like, and care at least some about the personality then it's not shallow. If you want I'll be the first one to admit it, and look I'll even leave my screen name to it so that way-

I don't like fat guys, I don't like overly skinny guys, I don't too hairy guys, I don't like guys with no hair, I want a guy who can pick me up, I want a guy who's got a bit of lean muscle, I want a guy who has facial hair he can pull off, I want a guy with curly hair (don't ask I've always loved curly hair) and I want a guy who cares about how he looks and tries to maintain it.

Now, just because I have expectations doesn't mean I'm shallow. I care more about his personality than his looks but his looks still matter. Because, I'm not going to lie, I want to have sex with my boyfriend because, if I fall in love with him, it's just one more way to show it. And if there's no physical attraction that won't happen. Not to mention I'll be embarrassed by him in public because I'll feel like I want some one I could be proud of how he looks, I will feel uncomfortable with him alone.

I'll repeat this once more THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH CARING ABOUT THE WAY PEOPLE LOOKS. I HATE this stupid standard we have that if we aren't willing to date fat or ugly people we're shallow. That's not true! It's just not! And f*** any one who says it because EVERYONE has standards and EVERYONE has people they're not attracted to and people they wouldn't date.

People shouldn't need to settle because every one else is so insecure about their looks or don' care that they call names and point fingers when some one says "I don't like you because you're fat". I won't settle, never will. We all deserve to be perfectly happy in our relationships and we all deserve to be with some one we're physically attracted to because, at some point, that becomes important.

Now, just because some girl you like didn't think you looked good doesn't meant that all girls don't. All girls are different and care about different things so you'll find the girl that like you and finds you attractive. Just like you wouldn't date a girl you didn't find attractive don't expect all women to like the same thing in guys or give up standards to date some one they didn't like the looks of.

It's healthy, normal and even biologically encrypted that we like certain traits and seek out certain things in our partners. So yes it is too good to be true. But it's also a stupid ass stigma that people shouldn't care about looks. ANd no, girls don't care any more than guys do. It all depends on the person. And the average of each gender is just about exactly the same.

You'll find some one who thinks your hot, till then, no girl, or boy, is any worse for having standards so get over it.

kimu11 · Accepted Answer

I don't really make a big deal out of it. My family knew my perfect type with guys when it comes to looks. Imagine Son Dong Woon from the band B2st or Beast - my type of guy. But when I showed my family the guy (who is a close friend of mine whom I've developed feelings for) I am currently in love with, they got scared. The first thing they asked me was:

"Are you sure? From the way he looks, I don't think I could trust him."

It offended me like hell. I love my guy. They have no idea how he behaves, they just judged him based on his looks... He is very caring, a gentleman, he respects my body, he respects my beliefs as well as other peoples' and he loves his parents and friends. I fell in love with him because of who he is and not how he looks.

... Now if I could just convince him to spend time with my family (apparently, their reactions hurt him a little D': ), and make my family give him a chance... Then there's a chance for him to prove to them that he is not as bad as he looks... Then hopefully, they'd approve of our relationship ^_^

When I see a handsome guy, I just think to myself that he's handsome. I find it hard to imagine myself spending my life with him in a relationship right away. So for me, I don't care if he's the hottest man in town. If he's a jerky douchebag (sorry for the term), then he's out. I'd rather date the "loser in class" who has morals.

FallenRose · Accepted Answer

Well looks to me means very little. The major part I care about is the personality. I believe beauty lies within the heart.

Yeahhbro · Accepted Answer

Girls in clubs are incredibly shallow, so if you are not the prototype do not go to clubs to pick up chicks, it won't work for you. The younger girls are the more shallow they are, as they get older looks aren't that important anymore. Women are also concerned with looks though, for instance would any body of the girls here date somebody shorter than them? I don't think so. Some might go as far as wanting a guy to be at least 4 inches taller than them, just because they want to wear heels and still be shorter than them. There aren't others that based their selection on what society or their friends think, if the guy is not considered attractive they won't date them. There are others that won't even date guys who don't feet this mold with them.

The only reason why it is though that women are less shallow than men is because they don't approach, if they approached it would have being different.

pandaninja · Accepted Answer

here is a statistic for you, under 1% of women marry men shorter than them, girls are just as superficial but they don't put their importance in the same things guys do, looks help but their superficiality comes from other factors like hight, manlyness, sucess in life, how good they are with kids etc...   now women don't lash out at me I'm not calling you all gold diggers these are just things that girls look for subconsiensly its what makes girls find guys attractive like guys have certain details that turn them on a guy isn't an ass just cus he like the girl with the nice body he is just, well, attracted to it

mormollio · Answer

That is a lie. You're always going to pay attention to someones looks. That doesn't mean you can't look past that later, but I believe who people who say they don't care at all about looks are liars.

Ex. If you see a guy with a chainsaw covered in blood and it's not halloween, do you really think you tried to strike up a conversation? People make assumptions based on appearances all the time, even if your not doing it on purpose. The eyes are closest to the brain, It's natural to make associations between things you see. :l

Quadrophonic84 · Answer

Hardly. What I have found to be generally true is that once attraction has been established, women seem to be more likely to overlook physically unattractive features if they are compensated for by other traits like personality, skills, talents, etc...

But many girls, especially younger ones, are just as superficial as we are.

laura_torres2375 · Answer

i am going to be completely honest... okay look ima tell you a litte story.. here it goes... I met a guy  in a night club .. when I saw him I was like no no no don't talk to me right, becaausse well he was not goodlooking at all but then his conversation was so interesting and the way he treated me was so diffrent to the other guys... guess what I gave him my number,., and I considered him ugly... bt now I see him as beautiful he treats me like a queen and omg he puts so much effort to see me and that replaces what I didn't see when I first saw him.. so to your question looks do matter but if you have a good sense of humor.. a good personalitie or a good character it will automatically replace your weakness areas ;) get it..

kereru · Answer

Of course looks matter to girls, although apparently not as much as they matter to guys.

Put it this way, I've never met a guy so hot that I'm still attracted to him after finding out he has no brains, personality or humour.

on the other hand I've fallen for plenty of guys who I didn't think were very good looking at all when I first met them, because of their wit, personality, confidence or whatever.

This is not to say I date guys who I find unattractive.

What I'm trying to say is a guy can be attractive and alluring even when he doesn't photograph well. Confidence, power, humour, personality and integrity are also sexy.

Anonymous · Answer

It isn't true. But girls all have different opinions on what makes a man attractive. I personally just like tall guys who have a decent build (don't look weak or really fat). Other than that the personality is what attracts me.

Girls have all sorts of different views on what attractive is, so every single man in this world could be found attractive. Some girls find ugly what other girls adore, and vice versa.

So you will most likely find someone who finds you attractive and likes you for your personality.

Anonymous · Answer

Both genders are influenced by looks at some level. Typically though, men are visually stimulated to a much higher degree than women.  Case in point::  how many p*rn magazines are published for the viewing pleasure of women?  Of course a woman is going to be attracted by a good-looking man, but personality is also a big factor.  I can only speak for  myself, but a lot of times, beauty is only skin deep if you know what I mean, and some of the more plain guys have developed personal character qualities that make them a lot more attractive to me.

Anonymous · Answer

that is completely false. we do care about looks. most girls who say looks don't matter are usually the unattractive girls who know they can't be too picky anyway. I'm not saying you have to look like a model, but the physically more appealing you are the better. personality matters also but an ugly guy with a good personality will still have a hard time finding a girlfriend. the better looking the girl is the more we care about looks. you will rarely see a 9 dating a 3, its just not going to happen.

its funny how some guys get all emo about women being "shallow" when its just human nature, and they know damn well they would not want to date an ugly woman either, but they expect us to overlook ugliness in a guy? I don't think so. if I'm going to be dating you I have to at least like what I see.

kayharr · Answer

When you truly fall in love with someone looks don't matter. There is this guy who looks like price charming (I'm not kidding he really does!) and this other guy who is just average but I fell in love with him because of his personality and how kind and sweet and caring he was. Initially looks do matter but once you truly get to know someone the importance of looks fades and their personality becomes what you fall in love with.

CuddlyCarla · Answer

I don't get what's up with these lame generalization guys and girls are responsible for on this site. Why is it so hard to understand that every man and woman on this planet is an individual and thus has very different tastes? What one isn't into another is, and vice versa? It's not rocket science, people. Like snowflakes, none of us are the same, which makes generalizations a moot point.

silverflower09 · Answer

This is both true and not true all at the same time. There are many guys I didn't think were cute, but I grew physically attracted to them as I got to know them.

There are also many guys who I've never grown attracted to.

Personality can lead to physical attraction and it also causes a deeper emotional connection.

dryad · Answer

Looks do matter to us girls. Just ask the question: if you could create a man any way you want, what would he look like? (Scenrio being you're stuck on a desserted island forever, just the two of you)

Trust me, he's going to be good looking, physically fit and well-endowed when it's over.

jessyjay · Answer

Looks are a plus ... Its more about the personality and the way the way the guy treats the girl. At first the look do catch our attention because eye candy is hard to refuse but girls get tired of the hot guys because more often than not they turn out to be asses.

JELLYICOUS · Answer

I'm pretty sure all girls care about looks but I'm guessing you mean like amazing.

some girls just wake up shower and do their hair. like kept groom not make up to the extreme like natural looking

but true beauty is in the heart, some people just don't see that

DanielaFilipa · Answer

I care about looks...

be clean well dressed... simple things... but personality is the really thing for me... but he got to take care of them self or how could he take care of me?

get that? we need someone we can depend on... we what the full package =D

domino · Answer

No, they really do.  They care quite a bit about looks.  It has been driven into them since a young age that looking good is an unconscious behavior by the majority of women on this planet.  But if your talking about women being interested in the "look" of their partners, then the same story.  Women, even if they state otherwise, are quite driven by physical attraction too.  Its the same for both genders...just a tad bit more for men.

grimm_ninja · Answer

Hahaha well I think this is true for everyone, it just takes longer time for other people to realize it.people to me are attractive (this sometimes even comes into play with friends) who can have even the slightest confidence in their personality over looks because this will sometimes put a strain on the relationship -_-.

people who are concentrated on looks I have no problem with either. Its just the judgement is pointless.

woohoo_friday · Answer

I do care about looks.  However, I care more about personality.  A good personality can make me swoon, haha.  I might not find a guy super attractive at first meeting, but if he makes me laugh, for example, I will instantly find him more attractive. It's happened before, many times.  Like with my younger brother's karate instructor.  I won't get into it unless I really need to though...

keeptalking · Answer

Well, not entirely true, but if we get to know the person inside, no, then looks matters less and less. That is true. You can be attracted to a person, and to someones physical appearance, exclusively. Of course we enjoy eyeing attractive boys, but we don't always consider them partner material. If there was this most wonderful guy in the world that was extremely ugly, I would lie if I said it wouldn't affect the physical attraction, but it has nothing to do with love.

AustinMan · Answer

It all relative and it varies from woman to woman just like it does for guys.  Generally, men are much, MUCH more visual than women.  That why lingerie and p*rn are such huge are such huge industries.  Some men are much more interested in a girl's mind and heart than her looks but that's relatively rare.  It's all built into the fundamental biology: men compete and women choose.

mackal2 · Answer

well we do care about looks a bit but the personality is a lot more important because what is the point of going out with someone who looks good but hates everything that you love it just does'nt work. looks just help if you want to start a conversation with us but most girls look for personality over looks. hoped this helped ;D

true_lover · Answer

I care more about the fact if he takes care of himself. You don't need the body of a model to win my heart. I mean.. when you're a student  you DRINK A LOT ! so it is pretty understandable that you have a small belly :) I don't mind. As long as you have a positive vibe around you and make her feel safe when she is with you... you're good ;)

Jillian222 · Answer

I care about looks, of course I do, but I care bout personality more

If the guy is cute BUT isn't funny and gets jealous easily or something, I wouldn't go for him because of his personality.

But if the guy is Cute AND has a nice personality, then that's the guy I'd be going for.

JennyInLove · Answer

we do care, just as guys do care about girls' looks. but we don't go for looks that much. I, personally, go more for brains and well humor and a great personality. I go for looks too, but I can fall in love with someone not so attracted just as much as for someone extremely attractive.

erekmax · Answer

Yeah they do, and if they say otherwise, they're not being entirely honest. Women are just as visual as men are. Only difference is, guys are more vocal about it. There also isn't anything wrong with caring about looks, it's part of evolution and our basic human nature.

Anonymous · Answer

Looks help, but so do a bunch of other things.  Sometimes a girl will be attracted to someone she KNOWS isn't good looking, but she's still into him.  BTW, "personality" doesn't just mean being nice...it could mean different things: funny, intelligent, brave, etc.  Different girls are turned on by different traits.

Anonymous · Answer

If you are better looking girls will look at you but still be intimadated to go up and just talk to you, I would much rather a guy have the confidence to just come up and say "hi my name is..."

than some guy thath just looks good and has no personality or can't talk to me first

RosaliaVanderbilt · Answer

Looks matter, but the common argument is that money matters more.  It's not true with all women, but rest assured that you will look taller if you stand on your wallet.

number10 · Answer

Looks catch our eyes, but personality catches our heats. If a guy is good looking, then I'll want to get to know him more, but if his personality is rotten then I will stop.

Arwens-Fire · Answer

Women care about looks just like men do...dont be fooled. Other things are equally important however...dont be fooled.

Olya363 · Answer

true true true I admit that I'm shallow at least :P

xSweetestSinx · Answer

Looks are the first thing we notice about someone. They determine what we think of them and whether or not we want to pursue getting to know them.

Anonymous · Answer

It sounds too good to be true because it isn't true.

Whoever told you that was lying.

We care about looks, but we care more about personality.

Women have certain types, while men want any kind of a girl that looks good...

DonMichelle · Answer

They care about how much oil you may have lying beneath the land you own... or you're incredibly good looking, 1 of the 2

darkknight1x · Answer

They care a lot about looks especially the good looking ones. Women are way more shallow than us.

finallyaftertwoyears · Answer

Beauty catches the eye, but personality captures the heart.

will12345 · Answer

Aye. That's because it is too good to be true. My Theory - You could be the greatest guy in the world. but with out looks, you arn't going to get anywhere.

Anonymous · Answer

Thats a lie a whole load of girls judge only on looks it the same as guys buh there are a few that wouldn't cuase there not so shallow but most people are.

Anonymous · Answer

For me the looks are the first part of attraction, just like you guys are initially attract to looks.  But after that personality and chemistry go so far.

browolf · Answer

except on the internet, where they don't have the context of your winning personality.

IN5AN1TY · Answer

Yes they do, although most don't admit it. As my theory goes: You could be the greatest guy in the world, but without good looks, you arnt going to get noticed.

Anonymous · Answer

I definitely care. I take care of myself, I expect the person I'm with to do the same. I don't date fat or ugly guys because, I'm neither. why would I settle when I have options?

alicialovely · Answer

I wouldn't say that.

Personally, and this might not be for everyone- but I want to at least be attracted to my significant other. I don't at all have a certain "type" of guy... like... there's not one certain way a guy has to look in my opinion.

socalgamehater2006 · Answer

bullsh*t, I'd say guys judge girls for their weight as much as girls judge guys for their height

erekmax · Answer

Anyone... Man or woman who says they don't care about looks is either blind or not being 100% totally honest.

The_shy_darkness · Answer

well here is the tricky thing about this question its kinda a yes and no answer because it a girl likes to then you are beautiful to her it just goes back to the old saying beauty is in the eyes for the beholder

Anonymous · Answer

i don't haha. its the sense of humor I'm attracted to! the only physical feature in a guy I actually pay attention to is the eyes :P.

Anonymous · Answer

Where the hell did you get that idea from? Sure, looks aren't as important to women as it is to men, but we still value them.

Anonymous · Answer

Some do, some don't. We aren't all the same,and it really depends on the girl.

Anonymous · Answer

i have to be attracted to you but personality is by far more important to me

Anonymous · Answer

Some girls do A LOT, some girls do some, some girls a tiny bit.

jess6axle · Answer

Not really, I mean as long as he's fun to be around and not butt ugly we don't care

LovelyyMe23 · Answer

Some Girls Do , Some Don't , Some Are Like "oh well as long as he treats me right" I'm like "both"

justplayin · Answer

oh but it is my dear ;P

Anonymous · Answer

That's a lie and same goes for guys.

Shadoww · Answer

More of personality to me.

enlightenment · Answer

yes...its not true.

Anonymous · Answer

They do, but usually don't think too much of it.

Stahl · Answer

...it is

Anonymous · Answer

Not so much

So girls don't care about looks?

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