How do you feel about school dress codes that specifically seem to target girls?

[Anonymous]

There are a lot of dress code rules that seem to target girls with the implication that dressing a certain way, especially as it relates to the boys at their school, is a problem that they should be punished for with things like having to change, detention, or being sent home. "If you dress like X, it will be inappropriate because guys will be staring," type rules.

Some that frequently pop up are: your skirt/shorts must be to the knee, you cannot wear tops that reveal your clavicles or shoulders, no spaghetti straps, no midriff/strapless tops, no bra straps showing, etc.

[RavVid]

This one of those zero sum polemic arguments. Polemic because it will be based on some values that might be held strongly by some but not by others and zero sum because it is not going to get anywhere.

In a lot of countries school children have school uniforms they MUST wear. In the US I think there is no school uniform in general but correct me if I am wrong. School dress codes only arise in those countries without school uniforms.

In the US, beauty and fashion spending is about about a trillion at a about a 50-50 split. Guys buy clothing too so pick your pro rata of choice but it is reasonable to infer that females individually and collectively are willing to spend big on looking good. Perhaps that is an innate desire or a societal pressure.

You could argue that schoolgirls should be free to participate in this without restriction which is the framing the question is posed in.

Against that there are a lot of arguments that can be made. e. g. It is better your daughter is actively concentrating on calculus homework than what her outfit should be tomorrow. It is not good if school is a fashion parade/competition. It is not appropriate for schoolgirl to wear a "I'm A Pornstar" T shirt ( have seen barely pubescent girls wearing same).

In short, you can sum this up as saying school girls should not be sexualized by society or their peers or THEMSELVES at a fairly young age. And dress codes or uniforms resist sexualization. A fairly reputable argument.

In terms of the schoolboy side of this. You can teach boys not to yell out "Show us your tits" but you can't teach boys not to be highly interested in tits. Boys aren't pulled aside at school for lessons on objectifying girls. It is innate. You may not like that, but 19 billion would not be spent on porn by mostly men if it just wasn't so.

As to how much schoolboys are distracted by how schoolgirls are dressed I think is debatable. Yes schoolboys get distracted by sexual thoughts, but it is not quite like Porky's or the Revenge Of The Nerds which is exaggerated for comedic effect.

Once again, doubtless discussion on this topic will go nowhere.

[Wade12345]

The local school district requires school uniforms.

It made the rich people mad because they like being attention whores from wearing designer clothes that most parents can't afford to buy for their kids. Which was actually the number one reason the school district changed to uniforms, to remove the rich peoples unfair advantage in the education system. There are a lot less fights at school now and the kids in the majority white schools even get better grades now.

The kids in the majority black schools are still failing. Nothing anyone tries ever ends up helping the black people in Louisiana because they don't help themselves first. They want a free pass on life. I tell them education doesn't come easy. When I was in school I read math and science books from the library. By the time I was a senior in high school I was reading TWO math and science books from the library every day just because I liked science and math so much, in addition to reading epic novels for entertainment. I probably check out every book in the math and science section and read them that year. Educate yourself, black people, don't wait for someone else to do it for you.

[OddBeMe]

Every law seems to target women, because men are mostly in charge. Bathrooms, dress codes, prostitution, abortion…

Back on target, there is research that says uniforms done right have a good effect on grades, bullying etc. But thats at the expense of expression and all that stuff.

[BlueScorpio]

Every place has a dress code to follow and needs to abide by. If you're going to a important interview where everyone is dressed professionally , are you going to show up in a bikini or your Friday night club outfit? Probably not. If you're throwing a children's party for your kid would you want the guess showing up in stripper attire? No.

It depends on the place and environment, when i was in school these were the exact same rules we has to follow. Boys were not allowed to have their ass hanging out their pants either. I swear shows and movies like euphoria these days really have kids thinking 16 year olds are walking the halls in a mini skirts, see through crops, and stilletos. That ain't realistic. At that age you have no business showing your stomach off to anyone.

Half the time the class was too freaking cold to wear any that stuff anyway.

[Dinklex3]

It used to annoy me.

No spaghetti straps, mid section showing, length of shorts, blah blah blah. Fine, cool. Whatever.

But it was more so the people enforcing them for us. I could wear the same outfit as someone else, but if it looked "flattering" on me, I'd be in the wrong and talked to. Shoulders, collar bones, legs, wearing tank tops when it's hot af would get people talked to. Especially if they were large chested.

My friend was a mother of a 13 year old boy and she stated she didn't like girls wearing certain tops because they distract her son during class. We all had a conversation afterwards, but it's sad that girls are taught to hide their bodies. If we don't we're shamed and told we're seeking attention.

[LaureenVO]

I think it's unfair and too strict. People express themself through clothes. Especially teenagers who are figuring out there identity. I feel like the dress codes are too sexualized and focused on woman. They should not be as strict as they are or should dissapear completely. My school didn't have a dresscode and there never was a problem.

[JohnK123]

Yeah but male teachers walking up stairs have to look down they can’t even look up or the women will call them predators for looking at them

[LaureenVO]

@JohnK123 male TEACHERS are not supposed to be attracted to GIRLS that are their STUDENT. They should take more distance on the stairs if they feel like they will see things they aren't supposed to see.

[JohnK123]

Lmao no if they can see stuff then other girls and other students can see that too

[LaureenVO]

@JohnK123 You're acting as if all girls walk around naked..

[JohnK123]

Only the ones who want to

[LaureenVO]

@JohnK123 My school doesn't have a dresscode and literally everyone just wear normal clothes. Sometimes a bit revealing, but never too much. Most girls don't even want to walk around half naked

[JohnK123]

Ok that’s one school out of millions

[LaureenVO]

@JohnK123 The more you restrict teenagers, the more they will go against it and the more revealing clothes they will wear. It's not just my school, it's because my school gives students an option. Because of that they don't feel like needing to protest and they wear normal clothes. It's basic psychology

[JohnK123]

Lmao ok but people don’t need to protest everything.
I don't know why none of the guys and some of the girls don’t have an issue

[_piotr]

These are good rules.

Men are visual and biologically attracted to women. You cannot teach boys that they should not be attracted to girls, because it is just by God's or nature's design.

It is like an epilepsy; when you turn on flashing light, the patient gets seizure. It is not their fault or will that they are experiencing a seizure. You can't just teach them to stop.

I do not think that most men "objectify" you, because I know that women incorrectly use this term to describe the fact that men just find them beautiful. By definition it is reduction of a person to a MERE sexual object. In reality, many men view women as complex persons. It is just that a body is undeniably an integral part of every human, and in case of girls this part generates sexual tension for boys.

Nobody is shaming you, actually women bodies are glorified and put on pedestal, while men nawadays are taught by society that they are ugly/unattractive, disposable. I actually envy women that they are desired. It is something men almost never experience.

A decent humen do not want others too suffer. That is why, I implore you, have some commpassion / pity /mercy for men and do not torrment boys. As women you have a power over men to torture them sexually, but it is morally better not to use it.

(Sorry for any errors. I am not native English speeker.)

[LaureenVO]

Out in the public you also see woman who would get dresscoded if they went to high school. Why is it so much different in a school? Beside that some rules are too much. Example: Covering your shoulders, how the fk do guys get horny from shoulders? Guys need to learn to not sexualize girls, even though they might be attracted to them.

[_piotr]

@LaureenVO "Guys need to learn to not sexualize girls, even though they might be attracted to them."
1) How is this possible? How do you know it is even doable? Do you know any method for this? It would be great if that was this easy. I wish some medicine could be invented for men so they would not experience sexual tension and be free.

2) This is like wanting to teach humans to fly! Impossible, as human don't have wings.

3) How guys sexualize girls? From this thread it seems rather girls sexualize themseleves by wearing sexually arousing clothing and are unhappy when asked to stop.

3) Church and some philosophes already tried to restrain sexuallity and despite passing centuries never succeded.

[Sn9th5bfn]

Envious of women being lusted over by men. This is the sign a male is an effeminate heading to trannydom and faggotry.

[_piotr]

@Sn9th5bfn What is so strange about wanting to be desired? It is normal human need. I did not said that by men --> men want tobe desired by women.

[_piotr]

@LaureenVO Perhaps some rules are too much indeed.

[_piotr]

@LaureenVO
"Why is it so much different in a school?" Because at school people are forced to seat for hours and look at certain direction. You can not just look away or walk away. It is also compulsory, you have to be there. If the girl is seating in a sexy clothing in front of boy, he needs to deal with this for many hours. There is also not much you can do to force your brain to escape. At swimming pool for example you can concentrate on swimming or other fun activities. At school the lessons are hard/boring/require concentration are thus allow sexual tension to grow enormously. Also remember that bikini or even naked body can be a lot less sexual than some certain type of clothing.
Please, just try reasonably not to subvert boys' fight against sexual thoughts by wearing sexy outfits.

[Sn9th5bfn]

Wanting to be like women is effeminate. I dont want to be a man or have any male traits. I love bejn dainty weak etc. Feminazis are headed to lesbianism if not already there. They want to be like men.

[_piotr]

@Sn9th5bfn Then I can be effeminate for you. No problem for me. It's better to have a good life than bad, just because of your labeling.

[LaureenVO]

1) I know many men who are attracted to girls, but can get a hold of themself. It's okay to feel things while looking at a girl, as long as you don't assault them or make them uncomfortable.

3) You're putting the sexualization on us girls. We wear what we want, not because we want to sexualize ourselfs. You are drawing away the attention from men and put it onto woman, basically victim blaming them. Girls do not fking sexualize themself. You are acting as if we walk around completely naked.

[_piotr]

@LaureenVO
1a) But boys should not feel things, they should study at school. Why subvert their efforts to concentrate on a subjects like maths, science, English. I admit that some laws are perhaps too strict, but some form of moderation and consensus is needed.
1b) Boys also do not want to feel uncomfortable. Certain clothes on women may make them feel uncomfortable.

3a) I can't agree with this. Both genders can sexualise themselves, but girls have a wider range of possibilities to sexualise. Men, unfortunately not as much. In case of date, you can put on something more sexy, but at school it is not needed.
3b) your "victim blaming" part is lame. It is so easy to point absurds in it. It's like someone would spray strong perfumes at himself and went inside bus. People would be like: "Sir, can't you use less of this perfumes, some of us can't stand it!" His response would be like "You are, all evil! I just like this smell and you are victim blaming me, you are awful, learn to like this smell, etc..." This is just ludicrous. Can't you see the absurdity of this?
3c) Walking around completely naked can sometimes be less sexually arousing than wearing certain clothes. Some people would be more affected by a girl wearing high heels and very short skirt than by wearing a bikini. A consensus is needed, but mostly it would be too hard to do organise, so schools put rules which in their opinion promotes quite safe clothes.

Also: School want its pupils to look smart and classy. Some of the forbidden clothes are just trashy. Schools also care about their image. That affects both genders.

[WindAtMyBack]

I went through school when there were still strict dress codes (strict compared to today).

The codes targeted both girls and boys. Nobody thought anything of it. This was in the 60s and early 70s when the large majority of young people were very liberal. But I never once heard a girl or boy either one complain about there being different rules.

Why is it suddenly such a big issue?

People used to protest about blacks being lynched. Now they protest because someone doesn't use the right pronoun or because they aren't allowed to show their belly button.

[Sn9th5bfn]

I hate the wold

[TonyV]

That pic is a lie, none of that was exceptabke at my school, no boys were wearing tank tops like that, guys showing their underwear were told to pull there pants and frankly the girls got away with almost anything, I temper one girl had a shirt that was open down to her damn belly button with no visible bra, I could see most of her boobs.

And I got told I couldn't have a pun t shirt, it had a squirrel with a bat over a pile of peanuts and said "protect your nuts" I had to turn it inside out for the day.

So somehow my joke t shirt was more provocative that tits being out and all the girls with low cut jeans that anytime they sat down you could see down their ass cause so much crack was hanging out.
Sorry girls can't wear spaghetti straps and Holter tops but they can wear normal sleevless shirts just like guys could.

[HighValue]

From that picture, none of them should be acceptable.

I've worked in schools for 12 years, and the ones that wouldn't let a girl dress like in the posted picture also wouldn't let guys wear shirts like the other two examples. I have NEVER seen a district IRL that allows one of those examples and not the others.

I think it is wrong that just because someone does something bad, instead of trying to correct them, they just want to let even more people do more wrong things. That is how we ended up with our current immoral trash society that we have now. People just kept making things worse instead of better.

[Drumlin2001]

Pretty sure if a boy turned up in hotpants, a crop top with bra straps showing he'd be asked to change.
Why do people always blame the system. A dress code is there to set standard for how you should be dressed in a professional environment. It's really not difficult to follow. If pupils cared less about how they looked and more about their grades the world would be a better place. A school uniform is the way to go, even then, some pupils still can't follow simple instructions on how to ear it

[BCA6010]

Back when I was in school, the dress code for girls was almost never actually enforced unless it was something really over the top. It was also pretty much the same for everyone except that guys weren't ever permitted to wear sleeveless shirts of any kind, and girls' had to have at least a 2" wide strap over the shoulders. Shorts (or skirts) had to be past your second knuckle while standing for minimum length, and obscene logos or slogans on anything was forbidden.

Remarkably basic to be honest, and in hindsight, I would actually support public schools enforcing a uniform standard, among dozens of other, generally more important changes.

[HippieVeganJewslim]

Them dress codes seem to attack me, on wearing headbands (funny how many other people in the same school wear them) and wearing kufi because I am Muslim. The kufi was Rastafarian coloured, so many thought it was too attractive or drug-dealing or whatever. When I unbutton a few buttons, they also tell me to button them, although I show no more skin as women with cleavage. Many people wear short so short knees are visible without being punished.

If a girl’s bra straps are visible, she can always remove them in the loo. Problem solved! I haven’t seen any girls breaking dress codes.

[ElementoP]

Women go around complaining about how horny and perverted men are, then complain that they can't show their bellies and half their tits and ass at school

You can't have your cake and eat it too. Highschool girls shouldn't be dressing like $5 whores anyway

[Anonymous]

I get that a lot of dress codes feel arbitrary but I never understood why this is such a huge issue for girls. What is stopping them from just wearing pants and a t-shirt everyday?

Also the overall message of the note on the bottom is total bullshit. The only way anyone can see you as an object is if they completely shut off their brain's ability to detect the emotions of others. This behavior should indicate that something is wrong with them but this note assumes that it's their default behavior. What makes you think lesbains aren't like that of that truly is how brains work?

[Sn9th5bfn]

They wanna get power by veing slutty and see boys lusy

[msc545]

I think that school dress codes are overly controlling and exist for no rational reason. This applies to dress codes for both boys and girls. As long as nobody comes to school exposing their private parts I don't think it much matters what they wear. I am far more concerned with what they think and what they learn or don't learn. After all school is for learning. School administrators tend to be minor bullies who aren't comfortable unless they're controlling everybody around them and in particular students.

[Apple1996]

Its really fucked up especially to girls under 18 cuz the school is basically telling them to stop sexualizing themselves when literally nobody should be thinking that about them. Better off teaching the male teachers and boys to stop sexualizing young girls instead of telling the girls how to dress.

[Asad1ONE1]

And yet, your gender sexualizes themselves and pretend to hate it. ##IDIOT

[Apple1996]

@Asad1ONE1 nobody can sexualize themselves with clothes unless they are completely naked

[Asad1ONE1]

That is very sad to hear indeed. End times definitely.

[Apple1996]

@Asad1ONE1 and tbh even naked isn't sexualized like it's just a body

[Asad1ONE1]

LOL!!!

[JohnK123]

male teachers walking up stairs have to look down they can’t even look up or the women will call them predators for looking at them

Lol gotta feel bad for them tho

[Apple1996]

@JohnK123 I don't feel bad for the creepy teachers

[JohnK123]

But they aren’t they just trynna walk up stairs

[Asad1ONE1]

@JohnK123 and if you don't look at them you're a sissy shy guy!

Lol just f*****g with my girl here

[JohnK123]

@Asad1ONE1 haha and I’m just saying it

[Aerissa_Jade]

Very much hate them, or those losers who say... it is a girls job to make sure that you don't give the boys the wrong idea.

I'm not giving them any idea's, they are in their own head.

They should apply equally to genders.

Besides I could just identify as a boy and get away with it all then right?

[Anonymous]

hmm. i always got told to pull up my pants when I was "sagging" and showing off my underwear. Just like a girl showing hers. Seems fair to me. Never see guys wearing "athletic" shirts like that middle picture either, unless they're coming to or from a sport practice. Funnily enough, it's the same for girls. Walking around in crop tops or sports bras for cheerleading or track practice, and I NEVER see them getting in trouble for it. I'm honestly so tired of this lie that guys get away with wearing all kinds of crap, while girls are punished for wearing stuff because "it distracts the guys".

[Bubbles16]

I think its stupid how dress codes are mostly targeted towards girls just because some things we wear might be considered "distracting" to boys doesn't mean it actually is like for example: a boy wears a tank top to school no one says anything but when a girl wears a tank top a teacher will tell her to put on a jacket or change because her shoulders are distracting the boys when they aren't

[Blueeyes81]

Thats funny because I ended up in the principles office multiple times for dress code violations. Mostly for not wearing a belt and letting my pants sag. The point of dress codes is to teach kids about being an adult. Most places of employment have dress codes because you are a representative and extension of the company. So while a lot of dress codes seem arbitrary and possibly biased its not fully without merit.

[NoUsernameSelected]

Teaching men not to sexualize women is like trying to pray the gay away. You can not stop arousal by teaching someone to not be aroused - and doing that to teenagers is basically grooming. Sick.

I really wish we could switch bodies for a bit so people realize what the other gender is going through.

[ElementoP]

It's not teaching them not to be aroused moron, it's teaching kids decency and making sure guys aren't distracted so they can pay attention to their school work, not the girl in the daisy dukes and belly shirt with half her bra showing

[NoUsernameSelected]

@ElementoP Edit your post to make it readable without insults or be ignored.

[hahahmm]

School should be for education not for being an attention whore or trying to look like you're 25+ years-old. I'd put 100% of kids in uniforms like I hear they do in Japan.

[SlightlyEccentric]

Then let's make it easy. Impose a nation-wide law that requires school uniforms to be so that it covers all skin except the neck, head and hands. Modesty wins and no one can complain about double standards.

[Asker]

I actually agree. A uniform isn't the problem, it's dress code rules that target one by their gender for arbitrary reasons. If skirts are a problem, make everyone wear pants/shorts for example. Don't want shirts unbutton, create a shirt that doesn't have the buttons going low or no buttons at all. Fair.

[Be3Bee]

I would expect the guy to be send home as well if he came into school dressed in a Spandex.

Thought never seen a case of any schoolmate being sent home to change dress. Guess we all used to dress within social expectations.

[RealMarek]

So where’s the limit? By this logic, girls should be able to walk around in school naked. If it distracts the guys it’s their problem.

[MAC1983]

No, what you wrote is a textbook logic leap.

But if the dress code said the students could walk around naked they'd have every right to do so, regardless of gender, and just have to deal with it! 😄

[Asker]

Rolls eyes. Nudity is already in law that says you aren't allowed to do it in public, let alone a school with minors, so that is CLEARLY not what is being discussed. Dress codes targeted at girls like if "you can see your clavicle, it must be covered," are ridiculous---schools make it seem like the boys are so horny a clavicle will distract them to the point of delirium. BOYS WILL LOOK AT GIRLS REGARDLESS OF WHAT THEY WEAR AND VICE VERSA!!! But long before uniforms were a thing in a lot of American schools at least, for decades kids went to school and managed to graduate wearing some pretty insane stuff, so why now is it being said that boys and girls can't function in a school if a shoulder is shown?