Talking to a stranger is anything but a cakewalk, whether you're outgoing or not . How many times have you told yourself "I should go talk to him?", and didn't have the courage to do it. We'll tell you: TOO MANY TIMES! And it's time to stop. That's why I selected these 10 tips for you, that will help you to talk (or flirt) to a stranger without being creepy.
1. Learn how to read body language
Look at him. Don't you notice anything? Yes, he's a human being. Like you, basically. From this first thing in common, you can draw a conclusion: there is a good chance to be able to interpret his attitude. If you know the difference between a flirty eye contact and eyes immersed in a book whose title could be "DO NOT DISTURB", you're getting off on the right foot.
2. Don't overthink!
Calm down, and breath. The world is filled with attractive people. This unexpected target sitting next to you in Starbucks, will NOT affect your future. But, he could leave at any moment, and you'll never see him again. So, don't let fate choose for you. Go for it!
3. Be precise and concise
Okay, you're there now, you started talking to him. Don't beat around the bush, you'll look like a door to door magazine saleswoman, or even worse, you'll look clueless. Use your words in the most efficient way, and be straightforward.
4. Don't apologize, don't diminish yourself
You know what you want (to see him again), and you have no reason to apologize for that. Like in the workplace, you have to show that you're determined. Although he might look a bit surprised (it's okay, it doesn't happen to him every day), you should not give up.
5. Find a common interest
"You love the caramel frappuccino? OMG, me too! Marry me". Please, no! Don't be too enthusiastic, but know how to spot details, even the insignificant ones, the ones you can share at that moment. The goal is to humanize a little more the situation by appealing to emotions.
6. Write down in advance your number
Let's put back things in their context: you're at Starbucks (or any other place), and he's probably going to work, and you too. You don't have much time in your hand. So make sure you have your phone with you to save his number or if you prefer caution, write yours on a paper BEFORE you tak to him.
7. Know when to stop (If it's not working)
If he doesn't look happy despite all your efforts, the situation might not improve. One tip: stay cool and leave. Some people are just not comfortable with the idea of public approach. Many others will be more friendly and will not have this whim.
8. Think of a place and day for a date
If it works, BINGO! If the situation requires it (a crowded subway, for example), say goodbye and hope that he'll call you. If, however,you have plenty of time to chat, think of a day and a place for a date, just to show him that you're really interested and it's not a truth or dare challenge.
9. Don't feel embarrassed
Whatever the outcome might be, what you just did demanded a lot of courage and forced you to put your ego aside. Just for that, you should be proud, because many people would not have to put themselves in this kind of vulnerable position. Not to mention the fact that if he rejects you, he probably has a thousand reasons to do so: already has a partner, no desire to be in a relationship ... Don't take it personally, you'll probably never see him again.
10. Leave like a queen
For all the reasons mentioned above, you're just a killer. Therefore, whatever the outcome might be, you need to leave with class ... and a bit of arrogance. Just to make him want to see you again, or, to make him regret what he lost
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