What I Learned From Pretending To Be A Ditz For A Week

[Anonymous]

I recently took it upon myself to become a ditz.

Not literally, but in an acting sense.

For one week I spoke to guys on Facebook, in public, and other social media platforms with the intention of coming across as a dim-witted, pretty, naive girl. And here are the things that struck me most about how different guys treat you when you go from being a modest, reserved girl to being a little bit of a jackass.

Preparations:

1. Must always use abbreviations and slang for texting (I.E. "ur", "ilysm", "jk, jk")

2. Must have full makeup on 100% of the time

3. Must let guys say inappropriate things and pretend to like it "Your ass is hot" "Aw thanks!!"

4. Must dress more provocatively than usual

5. Must pretend to be way more drunk than you actually are whenever alcohol is around

6. Must pretend to not know normal things (watch this)

7. Must pretend to be as absolutely air headed as I possibly can in general

(Taking numerous selfies and drinking from Venti Starbucks cups are encouraged)

AND NOW TO WHAT I LEARNED

1) Guys Instantly Paid More Attention To Me In General

Just by changing a bandeau to a pushup, leggings to short shorts, and minimal makeup to a full face, I immediately noticed myself get more attention. Staring was more common place and I got approached far more than I would on a typical daily basis.

2) Guys Were Less Interested To Ask About My Personal Life

Usually when a guy has started talking to me, he asks me about my life and what I'm into. But I found that I was more often asked things like how many boyfriends I'd had and what I like to drink.

What made guys go from asking me what music I like to asking what they can get me wasted on?

3) More Guys Approached Me On Social Media

As soon as a new picture was up I got messages from guys who I've been friends on Facebook with for years but never even spoke to.

Now that I was seemingly becoming more sexualized, I was also, somehow, becoming more approachable.

4) Guys Talked To Me For Longer

Normally if a guy would say something along the lines of "Send me pics babe 😜" or "You've got nice boobs 😍" I would respond with "Hah. Sure thing." or "I know. Bye!"

But when approached with these comments I would send back pictures of myself (nothing too out there) or with "Aw, you're sweet!".

In changing these texting habits, guys tended to stick around for longer. They would continue to ask for pictures and make less than romantic comments about my body because A) I was sending them and B) They knew they could get away with it.

5) Guys Didn't Expect Much From Me

Whenever I'd say something outrageously stupid, a guy wouldn't seem surprised. He wouldn't expect me to know certain things about politics or culture or have any opinions on religion or even have good taste in music. And he didn't care if I knew about those things or not.

6) It Was Easier To Approach And/Or Get Guys

It was somehow a lot easier to approach guys while I was pretending to be something I'm not. Maybe because I felt in my gut that they wouldn't reject me if I were just a silly, stereotypically pretty girl. They wouldn't be intimidated by me.

7) Nice Guys Stopped Approaching Me

The typical "good guy" that I'd become accustomed to being approached by just seemed to stop approaching me. Guys who would ask to take me on a date or tell me I'm cute rather than hot weren't there anymore.

8) Guys Weren't As Respectful Anymore

Guys didn't censor themselves to have the same courtesies as they did before. They wouldn't restrain themselves from commenting on my ass or my boobs or my hips. They didn't restrain themselves from saying those things knowing full well that I would hear them.

I guess because they didn't think I was the type of girl who would care.

So although it may be far easier to land a guy being a ditzy instagram-girl, I feel like I'll enjoy being the reserved, loner. Because somehow, being alone seems better than being surrounded by the wrong attention.

Accidentally clicked Anon - This was by MissMc3 😜

[amarahorrorstory]

Well, I consider myself ditzy but not stupid. I've never been school smart. I've got some pretty serious ADHD. Sometimes things just go right over my head. But I don't think anyone I know would consider me dumb, but like I said, ditzy yeah sure. I've got some depth to my personality. It totally just depends on what we are talking about because some topics I can be very informative but others you have to explain it to me 10 times before I just pretend to know what you're talking about. I do wear a lot of makeup, not all the time but if people are judging what type of person I'm going to based off of what I put o my face odds are I'm not trying to be friends with them. As far as clothing, I do wear a lot of crop tops and shorts but I REALLY like my body so if I wanna look good to myself, I don't care who that attracts. Doesn't mean I have to interact with them. I do have a big butt so people notice it regardless of what I do. Yes I get comments but it's mostly from other girls and if it is a guy he isn't necessarily being a dick, just a simple "wow, not trying to be rude, you've got a great butt" that's not gonna hurt me. I don't find that people disrespect me. I think it's also how I carry myself. I'm not someone to piss off. I'm very logical as well. So nothing about me says I'm just some bimbo. As far as guys, my appearance doesn't really play a factor, especially since I don't really post many pictures only of myself. I'm much better known for my artistic ability and spunky personality.

[Fathoms77]

Great stuff. :)

It also proves that lots of young guys really DO only care about one thing, and provided that thing has a pretty face and a nice walk, nothing else matters. :P

I wish I could promise that all guys grow out of it. The best I can do, however, is promise that at least SOME will. ;)

[myTake Owner]

Thank you very much!! :) Don't worry, I know that a few bad ones don't speak for all male kind :P

[stillagoodgirl]

You sound like me. Nice!
Thank you for doing this experiment. I myself have half tried it but I couldn't go through with the text abbreviations and more risqué clothes. It was annoying to text like that ESP with auto correct! And my mom would never let me leave the house unless I had something more "decent" on

I did the make up thing and acting less shy and bubbly. The more 'popular' stereotypical guys who'd usually ignore me seemed more interested but doing full face makeup daily is just too tiring. I don't know how girls do it!! Then you gotta take it off ugh

One thing I will say is that wow I didn't know that it was a good thing to be called cute. No guy has ever called me hot and I feel like cute is the least on the spectrum of compliments. Pretty or beautiful would be better in my opinion.
I thought it was hilarious that your fb guy friends came out the woodworks to try to talk to you. I almost wanna try that myself because I have a few that add me back and never message me or talk to me even though we use to talk in school.

[IceCubedude]

Basically what guys have been preaching all along , if you take care of yourself and are smart and modest you will be approached by decent guys.

if you dress slutty, act slutty and attempt to attract guys or act stupid like you did more guys will approach you bu almost all of them are after sex and see in you an easy target with no strings attached.

girls dont want to admit this but they know it deep down and i take into consideration how a girl looks, amount of make up she wears, how dumb and naive she is and of course how she acts with different guys , if she's easy sex it is , if i see she's not quite an easy taget and has a mind that actually works i change my game and become interested in a relationship not sex.

you have experienced it first hand and iam sure you know now how its like, all i ask from girls is to not be surpirsed with the results and actually listen to men when they give you a genuine advice instead of arguing how that dress is not slutty, cause at the end of the day you're selling an image that many variables influence, and if its the wrong one... the results will not be as expected.

[mrsingle]

I fell for a girl who acted more stupid than she actually is. At first I thought acting smart will make her pay attention to me over guys who just drink beer and kill brain cells watching football. Guess we both played an "act". Anyway, she loved getting attention because she didn't have to act flirty, only act needy and wait for guys to help her. Not many did, most just wanted the flirty/drunk acting girl who acted dumb to take advantage of her. I don't mind a smart girl, but I don't like girls who are too needy, so only when she asked for help instead of expecting it did I pay attention to her, I guess I wasn't the guy she actually wanted but she did say to me I'm smart either to put me on a pedastal or act needy for her own benefit, either way she seems to have liked smart guys she just didn't find me attractive except for my smarts, not looks.

I do see so many girls act dumb and it works on guys but the truth is because guys think it's easy to take advantage of her which is actually wrong but many guys do this, but if the girl truly is smart and acting she will manipulate the guy without him knowing and use him to do her bidding.
I've figured this act out long ago.

[stillagoodgirl]

Interesting I didn't know guys wanted to take advantage, I thought they just liked being a leader or superiority over her.

I usually turn a little ditzy around guys Ilike. My mind goes blank and iI'mat a wword sometimes. Also I'm afraidto show that I'm smart because I can be pretty mean and correct people. I feel like it's a turn off for guys since somethings I talk about they don'tknow and all they do is call me a nerdy and change the subject.
But I play dumb with female friends too since they say that I use too many big words in my vocabulary sometimes.

Ugh people usually think I'm dumb the way I look anyways so I don'tind being underestimated

[mrsingle]

@stillagoodgirl What do you think when a girl acts dumb, but corrects a guy when he dresses wrong? I was in a wedding party and my tie was tied wrong, I rarely ever had to wear ties in life so I wasn't sure what to do, this girl came up told me it's wrong and started fixing it for me without even asking, I found it very pushy and she was my partner for the wedding so I think she was embarrassed being with a guy who didn't know how to tie a tie and did it so she looks good.

[stillagoodgirl]

I think that's cute. Im sure she didn't mean to insult you or make you feel emasculated... kinda like if someone has lint in their hair, just get it out for them. There's no judgement

[xobrowneyedbeauty]

one of my exes told me i came off as ditzy. it's ironic because i'm actually not stupid, i'm very smart, i just tend to speak before i think and can come off as extremely dumb. when i was in high school i thought it was cool so i was really glad i was like that. now i know it's pathetic and i wish my brain would not do that but it's not my fault! and i actually do have a brain. if you're naturally kind of ditzy it sort of sucks to be honest because then people make fun and assume you're doing it intentionally! not to mention, i agree guys make these kinds of assumptions and you attract all the wrong types! :(

[myTake Owner]

I know what you're saying, coming off as ditzy doesn't necessarily mean you are unintelligent or less than anyone else, but it's the stereotype that guys associate with it that is the problem. Don't worry, you'll find someone who isn't stupid enough to judge your intelligence based on your attitude :P

[10dsw]

Interesting but not surprising.

One thing you'll notice is that girls that were ditsy in their younger years become bitter and hateful towards men in their older years, especially as they become more desperate for relationships. This "experiment" shows you why.

A lot of men, by default, will instantly disqualify ditsy, basic girls as relationship material in favour of a quick roll in the hay. In turn these girls will give these exact men all sorts of labels, etc.

In my younger years, if I was talking to a girl and she was showing off excess skin, acting ditsy or "bitchy" or flirty too soon... yea I would get excited and turned on but I would not consider the girl relationship material. I think a lot of guys think this way.

[IceCubedude]

indeed the majority of guys think like that

[MrOracle]

The lesson here is this:

Dumb girls aren't seen as "relationship-quality" girls, but rather as sex objects to be used for fun for a while - and nothing more. Guys don't respect dumb girls - but they'll approach them for sex because they'll probably get it (she's usually desperate for attention and has built her ego by getting it) and because he'll be able to get away with not giving her a relationship.

It also says that "relationship guys" tend to look for women with a brain, and with some self-confidence. Sure, they want sex just as much as any guy, but they know that sex is 5% of the day, and they'd like to be able to be around the girl the other 95% of the time without her asking stupid "chicken or fish?" questions all day long.

Is it not a GOOD thing that men respect women who are intelligent? I think so...

[Fearless_banana]

Lol that's pretty funny how you did that. I think it's simple.. men are intimidated to approach women these days due to some type of inferiority complex and you coming off dim-witted.. naive.. easy.. makes their approach of sexually escalating a little less nerve racking.

[BuchitaBuchys]

I've stupidly done something similar to this with a crush before and an ex boyfriend. Some men prefer a stupid, ditzy woman. I felt so wrong pretending to be stupid and helpless just to attract attention. But it fucking worked.
There's like a hidden attraction of some sort for the ditzy, simple woman and the "damsel in distress" that when you mesh them into one, lots of men go for it (maybe it's subconscious and primal, a remaining hidden instinct.)

It's not the right attention, and I definitely don't recommend it, but it will increase male attention for sure.

[BuchitaBuchys]

I agree with most of this but genuine and kind men still hit on me. The ones who are trying to "save you" will still try.
But they are, however, much less likely.

[StickStickity13]

Honestly we don't look for stupid. We look for women to take care of. We don't look for stupid independent women either

[BuchitaBuchys]

@StickStickity13 but stupid definitely helps lol

I'm always intrigued by why men seem to prefer to be needed and not just wanted...

[StickStickity13]

Because it's in our DNA. There are reasons women tend to want to be taken care of rather than being providers

[ccp16]

I think pretty much every thing you learned here I could have accurately predicted lol If you act like you're dumb, and the only redeeming thing you have going for you is being hot, then that is what people will value for.

The only thing you mentioned that I had not thought of, but makes total sense when I think about it, is the type of guys who hit on you. While I hate the term 'nice guy', I am respectful and nice to women, and I have high expectations smarts/ personality wise, higher even than looks. I can say that I don't care how hot a girl is, or how horny I am, if I can't hold a decent conversation with her for the night, I won't be able to get away with even a ONS lol

[Stardust143]

The key is to strike the right balance.

I think the quality of a girl's dating life really improves if she has a friendly, sweet personality, takes care of her appearance (healthy diet, exercise, flattering clothes, maybe some cosmetics, etc.), she has good social/communication skills and is open to getting out of the house and meeting new people, and she can hold her own in thoughtful, intelligent conversation.

If you can do most of that, that's when you attract men who are a real catch. 😉

[Stardust143]

Oh, and definitely interesting take/experiment you have here.

[VictoriousSausage]

This is an incredibly interesting experiment, i applaud your methodology, it's really interesting seeing people's attitudes towards different people, typically i'm not very confident when it comes to asking girls out, i haven't done so in about 10 months, nor have i flirted with anyone for a good 7 to 8 months, and I've found i'm not approached very often either, i always hold doors open for people in public areas, and that actually got me a girls number once, but that's only ever happened once, so it's interesting to see the dynamic change, i did a similar thing in London, and i got a lot more attention from it, i guess people just don't expect it, but i'm curious about how an experiment like this would pan out for a guy. i might give it a go.

[stillagoodgirl]

I didn't know guys actually expected to be approached. If you mean by approached just a girl randomly talking to you then OK but a girl asking for a guy's phone number (in person) from a guy she just met is rare

[VictoriousSausage]

@stillagoodgirl yeah, i don't mean to be approached, i don't expect it, which is why it comes as a surprise, but it is interesting in itself that guys don't get approached as often as girls do.

[QuestionMan]

The moral of the story isn't that being reserved is better than being provocative but that both suck and you need to find a middle ground.
If you dress modestly don't expect many guys to approach you and if you dress to revealingly don't expect the right guys to approach you.

You can dress nice and have a personality it's not one or the other.

There's no need to go to extremes.

[martyfellow]

Chuckle. When I made p a profile as a six-foot French blonde who liked wealthy older men, I immediately got dozens of offers to take me to New York for the weekend

My fried and I would show up for 'dates' set up by guys who wanted to entertain our profile. It was fun.

[Tephra]

OMG! I love this take! This made my day :D Could someone PLEASE do a male version of this little experiment?
I signed up to facebook a few months ago and at this stage I had no idea what I was in for. Never had social media before, always liked classic and traditional. However, I did notice a lot of girls on their facebook profiles showed more skin or cleavage just for likes. They would show of their bodies in a skimpy outfit and get double which made me curious, so I did a little investigating as in to why and a few takes, including yours especially has helped a lot.
I also notice in my local gym I started to wear more skin-tighting clothes as I was losing more weight. Noticed that a lot of guys really started paying attention... it was very uncomfortable and one guy had the nerve to just sit there and watch me do free weights without me completely knowing -_- Hate it. Never do weights in front of men anymore - at home lol.

[myTake Owner]

Thank you very much! :D Yeah, it's amazing what you notice by simply changing your general appearance

[TayTay21]

I act that way on purpose all the time. I get 10x more attention and get asked out sooo much more than when I'm serious. I've never understood why some girls have such a hard time getting dates. Just act ditzy and flirty and you'll drive guys crazy. They love it ;)

[JSmuve]

Not surprising really, but great confirmation.

You're sex appeal goes up which increases the attention from guys that just wanna bang you a few times while the attention from guys interested in your personality goes down because you're perceived as being out of their league.

[AleDeEurope]

Makes sense. Guys were seeing you just as a girl to have sex with, not one to build a relationship with, that's why you got the bad guys.

I understand many girls act like that because they like the attention, but if you're not a quality woman, you won't get a quality man.

[YourFutureEx]

Why did you go anon only to reveal yourself in the end? Anon checkbox isn't irrevocable.

Anyway, if you're wearing short clothes, you'll get more attention from me. But my behaviour won't change. You must be meeting a lot of horndogs.

Other things have no impact on me if not negative.

[myTake Owner]

It was accidental. I click anon automatically for everything I do, I don't really think twice about it.

[YourFutureEx]

You can tap/click the 'public' option again if you don't want to post as anon.
Like this:
●Public ○Anonymous

[myTake Owner]

I don[t seem to have that option. Is it possible that a Level 9 can't get that?

[YourFutureEx]

No. I think you mistakenly ignored that.
I checked it again. It's like:
Share this anonymously: ●No ○Yes

[myTake Owner]

I 100% do not have that option anywhere

[YourFutureEx]

You cannot un-anon your post AFTER submitting your take.

[myTake Owner]

That's exactly my point... I said I accidentally clicked anonymous

[YourFutureEx]

But you "wrote" it in your take, it means you didn't "submit" your take when you realised that you don't want to be anon. "Before" submitting the take, we can make it public.

[myTake Owner]

Are you okay? Do you not understand?
Before submitting it I clicked "yes" to go anonymous as a force if habut and therefore submitted it anonymously, to which I cannot reverse. I added the bottom text AFTER the post was made.

[myTake Owner]

To further clarify, as an editor, I can alter the writing in a take but not the anonymity of it.

[YourFutureEx]

-_-
s10.postimg.org/z3s4t7gfd/2016_08_11_08_17_41.png

[myTake Owner]

But I already posted it, what are you not grasping here?

[YourFutureEx]

Ok I understand.

[Anonymous]

Yup, YUp, YUP :D I did the same thing once and yes, you're totally right. brainless girls are more popular, sort of "popular" ... Guys know those girls are easy catch and of course, they are hitting on them b'cuz , they know they'll get what they want. who wants to waste their precious time on nice girls nowadays ?
The good guys OFC ! (0,01 % of the male population can be considered as Good :/ ) tooooo bad for us, good girls :/

[meatballs21]

The lesson here is that the image you choose to present to the world plays a large part in how people will treat you.