Why does my ex only flirt with me when drunk and are there still some feelings there or something?

[Anonymous]

I met a guy my first year of college. I didn't think I liked him at first but once he moved off my floor i knew that I did. At first it was just a friends with benefits thing but then turned into more and we both admitted we liked each other just never put a title on it. After 6 months he decided we would be better off as friends. After the summer he was dating a transfer but his excuse to me was he didn't want a relationship. They dated for 4 months and in that time period he "wasn't allowed to talk to me" and would tell his friends when he was drunk that he still had feelings for me. Two months after he and the girl broke up he asked me to stay the night at his house after a party (we were both pretty drunk), He'd been with other girls since the breakup. During the night he told my friend if any guy touched me he'd kick their ass (some guy reached over me to grab his beer bottle). I figured he just wanted to get some but we ended up playing candy crush in bed and talking for two hours and then all we did was kiss. He told my friend it would never happen again. About a month ago, we had my friend's 21st bday party at my house and he was obviously feeling the drinks he had. I got home from work late but everyone was still there. He jokingly came up to me and tried to wrestle/ put me in a head lock in the hallway, which quickly turned into me being thrown on my bed and him tickling me. His friend called him and we went back out to the kitchen and played beer pong, 1 on 1. He kept trying to get me to make a bet and had somewhat of a flirty tone. His friend caught on and said they were leaving before things went too far.
So I guess what I'm getting at is, is he still into me and can't admit it because he said I am someone he would want to end up with but I feel like he is scared or maybe he just likes to mess with my mind while he is drunk but it seems like the guy I fell in love with fun, loving care free comes out when he is drinking. Drunk words/sober thoughts?

Updates

+1 y

Why do guys flirt with their ex and threaten any guy who comes near their ex?

[crazed_mojo]

I'm willing to bet it is more of a wanting "someone" to be around but not necessarily wanting "you."

I'll just be a little blunt. You're the easy fallback after his last relationship failed. Since he believes you still have feelings for him you're easy to fall back into a non exclusive relationship just to have somebody around. Guys won't normally admit that, but they like to have a female counterpart around. It doesn't mean they love them or have those feelings for them, it's just nice to have the opposite sex around and the nurturing/etc. that goes along with it.

Believe me, my ex and I do this all the time. We end up hooking up when we are drunk and then hanging out the next day for a bit. It's just nice to have that with someone. Don't expect it to go anywhere. If he didn't want an exclusive relationship then he doesn't want one now and never actually will (though he may say he does just to keep you around). He's just buying his time until the next girl that he's into comes along

[Asker]

So even if that is the case, why does he threaten other guys? He talks to plenty of girls, he really doesn't need me around. But if my top is too low or if a guy tries to make a move he makes sure to tell me or threatens the guy. I can see being an easy fallback but why would a guy need one if he has no trouble getting other girls?

[crazed_mojo]

Because he still wants to have you while he continues to look for other girls. Also, he may still care about you and is trying to "protect" you in a way. But caring about somebody and wanting to be in a relationship with someone are two completely different things

In a way he's protecting his "investment"