Why do girls put guys in the friend zone?

[Anonymous]

It's kind of a complex question. Why do girls put guys in the friend zone? If those are the types of guys us girls are supposed to be dating aka the good guys (which are usually the ones that get friend zoned) then why do we do it? I also want to know then if you are dating a good guy that you are serious with then (I know most girls don't see it this way) why do we still hold on to our friend zone guys? Its sad because friend zone guys will stick around and some girls never give them a chance ever and some girls just use them. So guys why do you stick around? Is it because we like hanging out with them and spending time with them but in a friend way and don't want to lose that friendship? In my opinion I friend zone some guys because I feel we are better as friends and if we try to date I don't want to end up losing any sort of relationship weather dating or friend that we ever had. Then again I notice some guys once they start dating a girl they get jealous of their friend zone guys (or vise versa) even though in a woman's mind we look at it much differently than a guy does. They look at it as friend zone = like them/wants to be more than friends. So then let me ask this... is it ok to have guy friends? They say most guys only want one thing yet some can control their urges better than others so then why are those guys getting crap for wanting to be friends with a female. I'm in a relationship but I have guy friends or I should say acquaintances because I never really get to hangout because I have a boyfriend (and don't have time between college and my daughter) plus I think in some ways I see it half wrong and half ok (as long as it's not alone but group hangout is ok or is it not ok?). Does every guy that becomes friends with a girl just want a benefits relationship or do some of them truly just want to be friends? How come also girls that are friends with gay guys is more ok than a girl with straight guy friends? I'm just confused on this whole subject. Someone please shed some light. Thanks

[Anonymous]

The guys are put in the friend zone because the girl isn't physically attracted to them, which may be based on his looks, or a combination of looks plus personality factors. Personality factors more into female attraction than male. This isn't to say that women are attracted to 'nice' guys. They aren't. They aren't repelled by them either. Being 'nice' is not one of the personality factors that matters regarding attraction. Basically if she's not attracted it's probably some mix of his looks, confidence, assertiveness, ability to flirt sexually, status, whether he seems needy vs. emotionally strong, etc.

Why do guys stay in the friend zone? Well, let's put aside one thing that's not really 'friend zone', which is that people in relationships may have friends of the opposite sex. THat's not necessarily friend zone. Friend zone is someone who you wouldn't date even if both single.

Why do guys stay in it, when they want more? It's almost always young, inexperienced guys. TBH, I've almost never heard of a non-virgin guy sitting in the friendzone (I probably have, but it's exceptionally unusual). These guys have never experienced a girl actually being into them as more than friends, so the emotional intimacy they share with the female friend (which is not like a male-male relationship) FEELS to them like they're so close to dating, and they imagine if she'd just try...

Guys are jealous of the girls friend zone guys, because they understand those guys would date her in a heartbeat, are likely to be critical and undermine the relationship out of jealousy, and also likely suck up to the girl and make her more entitled/unreasonable in her expectations.

Some guys just want to be friends, but most male-female close friendships (not all) were carried early and frequently indefinitely by the guy acting as a pseudo-boyfriend, trying to win her favor and basically being unrealistically nice to her hoping she'll notice him.

A guy who is -actually- your purely platonic friend likely taunts you, is happiest hanging around in groups with you, makes no effort to be sweeter than you than other guys, and basically treats you like another guy.

I think I answered a bunch of your q, feel free to ask more or clarification.

[Rufus335]

i have lady friends but dont really think this hard about it. I dont see them frequently but thats how it goes. Focus on the guy you want to be with and spend your free time with someone who share similar interests. For example i dont have any lady friends sho like to snowboard so only my guy friends meet me at the mount. When i throw a party guys and girls want to show up so i get the full mix of friends. The difference is the event as well, dont take a girl inviting you to a party as "having feelings" its maybe but not necessarily. if she invites you on a more private thing its probably a definitely unlesws she states noone else would go with her. if she's friend zoneing you and you want to get to the next level ignore her 3/4 interactions and then be very nice that 1/4. She will be attracted to the independence and yearn for the nice guy she only sees 25% of the time.

Girls friend zone guys that they dont want to bang. Plain and simple. Also there are girls who yearn to bang a good guys as long as he's nopt a total pussy

[Anonymous]

Guys only end up in the friend zone when I have no sexual attraction to them.

I met a really nice guy last year at school, and he hung around me a lot and came over to my dorm all the time. The thing is, he was small and skinny and not my type at all. On top of that, he never actually asked me out but has acted butthurt when I've mentioned the guy I'm dating.

I feel for him because he's just acting out of frustration. The thing is, though, I'm not attracted to guys with his body type at all. So what do I do, tell him to go away and that we can't be friends? I know young guys want to get pussy, but hanging around a girl who doesn't want you is a terrible way to go about it.

[TimeSplitters123]

You should not judge looks, basically your just a shallow, obnoxious person.

[tzdc21]

That's exactly what you do. For his sake let him go and move on. Because you're doing him no favors by keeping him in your friend zone

[Summeroflove]

Mostly because they seem then as a friend…. They like them. They aren’t into him. We should find our soulmate. Not look for the approval of everyone or the opposite gender. That’s not possible anyways

[sp33d]

Because she is too cool for him or he doesn't live up to the image she sees in hollywood movies or maybe she's just crazy.

Why hold on to them? Well, you never know, do you? It's not like these guys have any significant sense of self-worth, so they'll be there whenever she, so much as, winks at him. It's disgusting, I know.

Well, that's the typical reason.

There is also the reasonable one, which is, she doesn't want a relationship and lets him know straight away - but there's not as much as drama like that.

[Friendzoned1970]

Women put guys in the friend zone because it inflates a. woman's ego. to. put a guy in the friend zone. Women are evil beatches.

[Anonymous]

The friend zone definitely exists, to an extent. You may be placed in the friend zone, but that don't mean you can't get out, you may be that nice guy that seems to always be put in the friend zone. Mainly because girls of younger age tend to be more immature and into "bad boys" but as they get older and more ready to settle down in life, it's the nice guy they tend to turn to.

[AmongTheApples]

Yeah, I'm not reading that wall of text. Welcome to my friendzone.

[BertMacklinFBI]

because they're not attracted to them?

[apple24]

I didn't know girls couldn't be friends with boys.

[Muhammad1999]

Being in her enemy zone is better than friend zone

[Anonymous]

because they are shallow