Are you oblivious when it comes to people liking you?

[SodaCheeks]

Is this you as well?

I was going out for dinner with a new friend. We're in the same studentchoir. We started chatting about relationships, so I told her I've never actually been in a relationship with someone before. Then she tells me she's surprised to hear this, because lots of guys from the choir we're both in apparently told her they thought I was attractive and would be interested in dating me.

Now it was my turn to be surprised, because I had no clue and actually thought none of them were even remotely interested in me, because nobody ever reached out to me. I'm so oblivious to these things. I just think they're being friendly.

Is anyone else this oblivious just like me? and how do you, as an oblivious person, see that someone likes you?

I'd love to hear your stories!

[340sunny]

Oh gosh yeah, I'm super oblivious. I hang out with guys usually so I'm used to being "one of the guys". That being said, I've awkwardly friendzoned quite a few guys just because I always thought they were just being nice and normal and didn't know they liked me until they admitted it, meaning that I had no time to think it over. Uh let's see. I was on swim team one summer with J, and he and I would hang out at every meet, and almost every day after swim practice either chilling at my house or playing video games and using the pool and hot tub at his. Well at some point he asked me what my type was, then told me I was just his type. To which I awkwardly responded, uuuuh I don't have a type haha. Gosh there are so many times I was oblivious

[SodaCheeks]

Whaha, oh this would defenitly have happened to me too. I've also have a lot of guy friends and I really believe it makes this more difficult, because we're used to being treated friendly by guys or something and aren't surprised when a new guy treats us friendly.

[340sunny]

Yeah, I definitely agree. It's honestly such a problem. Do you have any other stories?

[SodaCheeks]

I once went to our local cat café on my own, I was part of a scavenger hunt and people had to find me there with clues. There was nobody there, but me, because it was just after opening time. There was this waiter there, he was pretty cute. He took my order and brought my drink. Then after a a while he sat with me at the table and starting chatting with me about everything and anything. About the cats, about the café, about himself. He started asking me all this stuff about myself, pretty personal questions. He sometimes had to get up to help some other guests, but everytime he went back to my table to chat with me. This should have been the first clue, but oblivious as I am, I didn't see. The second clue was that he was picking up a cat and starting performing trick with the cat just for me. He let the cat walk from one hand, over his shoulders to the other hand. It was pretty impressive. But did I take the hint that he was trying to impress me? of course not. After a while he even offered me a drink 'on the house'. And there I was, just thinking "oh, how nice of him". How did this end? The scavenger hunt was over, I payed my bill and left. Not long after I discovered he was the bass-player of a pretty famous band in my country, I saw him on the telly and he told the interviewer that he had been single at the time I was in that café, because he was telling about how his relationship started (and when). I am an idiot.

[340sunny]

Oh gosh that's awkward. At least he didn't tell about the girl he crushed on at the cafe

[SodaCheeks]

I've been facepalming myself for quite a while after, yes. Oh yeah, that would've been super awkward haha

[Cynicaldreamer]

Oh yeah, horribly so. I can point out to others if someone likes them with no issue.

But a guy basically has to be holding up a sign that says he likes me and it's not a joke, for me to know if he likes me, lol

[SodaCheeks]

Haha, yeah that sounds just like me. So what do you need for a guy to get through to you? Does he has to ask you out or just say it or?

[Ankitasingh466]

Mines is a bit different. When my bae used to say "i like u" , i used to say "i dont like u" and pause. Then i used to say "i love u". And he started smiling.

[SodaCheeks]

Awh, so cute haha

[Ankitasingh466]

Lol. U should look at him when i said "i dont like u'. He put his head down in disappointment and said "oh, alright".

[SodaCheeks]

I can imagine his face, poor guy, but then he got some better news after, so 🤷

[Ankitasingh466]

Yea yea. He pounced to hug me and bit my cheeks.

[Anonymous]

Yes. I'm not sure how many have shown interest in me (maybe I never picked up on it?), but I know there have been one or two that made it very obvious, and even making it obvious (without actually saying so), I still doubted it. That's why we always tell you women to be direct, not subtle. Because if you leave room for doubt, we'll doubt it for sure.

[SodaCheeks]

That's a good summary, not just for men but for me as well haha. I'm going to steal that last line from you.

[Logorithim]

It's happened to me in environments where I am focused on other things- one of my professors was interested in me but it never occurred to me because I was focused on my studies and she was older than me. Doesn't happen most of the time.

[Texaskid1]

It happens. People are not always good at picking up hints.

[Anonymous]

I’ve made it a point to tell people that I like them, it’s made a big difference.

[CuriousMufuxka]

Sometimes it's hard to tell, definitely with women..

[SodaCheeks]

Why is that?

[CuriousMufuxka]

Quid pro quo.. A like equals an answer.

[Paris13]

Smart as a Whipper Will Whip. xx

[ImpressiveUsername]

Yes, I'm terrible at picking up signals.

[Americanteengirl]

No it’s easy for me to tell

[rgb008]

Yes.

[MisterSir]

i am oblivious