Why do guys flirt one day and ignore you the next?

Like they flirt with you one day by sending "mwah" through a text or whatever else, and then the next practically ignore the girl the next as if she doesn't exist. Especially when the guy knows that the girl likes him and they are good friends.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Its all a game, on both parts,

    Take it from me, a player, I do what you described when I want to build desire in the other person and it totally worked on you. Don't believe me? Your thinking of him and why he's doing that, its gotten to you so much you had to come on to here to ask about it face it you're stuck thinking about him hardcore not that its a bad thing and not that he's a player I'm just telling you the psychology of it all.

    Another thing I'll do is send my first few texts, that is if I EVER text which I hate because its so impersonal and cowardly in my opinion, but I digress. I'll send the first few texts in a quick response type thing then I'll gradually slow down the speed at which I replay throughout the day. This makes you girls wait for that next text in the same way as above, it keeps me on your mind as well as subconsciously makes me more valuable and seem like a harder catch because you wonder what's taking my attention away from you.

    Any more questions about why guys do what we do when we game and I'd be glad to tell you just ask away, I help girls with this stuff all the time.

    • You are right. I have been thinking of him a lot lately, and it's started to bother me because he's been so distant lately.. But I've kind of gotten used to it. He works nights.

      I have a quick question again though. Me and him were doing that question game and I asked him if he's ever cheated on his past girlfriends, he told me he hasn't. But when I was in the car with him and his brother, he was telling his brother about how he had done it with his last gf's best friend. But lied to me...?

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    • Yeah it makes me sound like a d*** but its just that if I can get a girl easily I don't want her and trust I've done it so much its almost 2nd nature so its harder and harder to find the girl that keeps up a challenge. I probably need to chase a fellow player. Odd because the only reason I am one is because I was played, weird how things work out.

    • The only reason I've told other guys about me liking someone else is because they ask me if I do. Yeah I know, I don't HAVE to, but I was being, in a way, nice to them by letting them know since they asked and all, lol?

      And I know for a fact that the guy I like right now isn't a player. He tends to talk about his ex a few times here and there, but nothing big. (They broke up almost 6 years ago...). Which I'm not gonna lie, concerns me. He might still have feelings for her and that alone scares me

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 5

  • 1. Gets busy

    2. Gets stressed

    3. Other family issues

    3.5. Depresed for some reason

    And those are just the first few that have nothing to do with the girl..

    4. Didn't feel you flirted back

    5. You or a friend said somthing that question if you like him

    6. He's hoping his lack of flirting will make you flirt more

    7. He's worried he's flirting to much and you think he's clingy

    8. He's worried he's bugging you when he texts

    9. He started every texting conversation this week and wants you to start one

    10. He's worried he doesn't know how or has already flirted every way he can

    11. He's worried you don't like him flirting with you like he did..

    And the list goes on and on...

    Him not liking you is so far down the list its crazy.. If he's flirting then stops..

    Dont worry right away.. Give him one day of no texting then flirt with him

    Text him this.. "SMILE...or else... Jk :p"

    Or somthing simular have fun with it..

    • Oh sweet, thanks! This definitely helps(:

  • It's called "I have a life and I'm not desperate enough to give her so much bullsh*t attention."

    Are you an attention-wh0re? You're sounding like it.

    You want him to flirt more with you? Then go see him when you both have free time. Flirt in person.

    • We do flirt in person, I was just saying that the text thing was when we were apart/haven't seen each other in almost 2 months and it was while he was at work, so it's impossible to visit him and hang out.

      And no, I'm NOT an attenion who re. Sheesh, And to think I came on here for advice...

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    • Don't be afraid to text him then. If you want to talk to him, then take action. If you ever leave it up to the guy to make contact, he will once in a while. But having to put all the effort into keeping contact can grow old pretty fast and we'll most likely take the hint and walk away if nothing comes of it.

    • I have been, but like I said before, he works evening/night range. Kind of hard to talk to him on the phone or text when he's working. And he works an hour away from me, so don't tell me that 'then go visit him at work' crap, cause it's not going to work.

  • Short attention span

    • Ha, no, I know for a fact that's not it.

  • It could also be he had an interest in you that day and the next day he found a different girl who he had more interest in so he trying to flirt with you instead and forget you.

    • He's a really good friend of mine, I don't think he'd want to "forget about me". That would be pretty damn mean of him.

    • I have a friend who was my best friend and he did the same thing, and then did just legit "forget about me." We don't talk anymore. So although "pretty damn mean" remember it is definitely possible! Not trying to bring you down, just letting you know some people are stupid. As I'm sure you have already figured out!

  • this is called "i have a girlfriend"

    • He doesn't have a girlfriend though...

    • (that's what you think.)

      or maybe he's just into flirting and you are not the only one on his list.

What Girls Said 4

  • i always find that boys are like alastic bands or something like that lol he'll probally start flirting again soon but then again he'll just stop and pretend not notice you. ( I know it's weird) I hoped this helped ;D

    • Ha, the elastic band is a good way to describe them! XD Fits almost perfectly.

  • I know this is 3 months ago but if you haven't figured it out yet and he's still doing this, he isn't interested. He's just stringing you along. I had a guy do this to me for over a year and it was HELL trying to figure him out. Eventually I told him how I felt (even though I'm pretty sure he already knew) and now it's like a weight being lifted off of my shoulders.

    • it's alright, your comments are always welcome :)

      But I know exactly what you're talking about! The guy I was talking about led me on for almost a year too expecting me to think he liked me back, when in all reality, he never did. He was just flirting with me because he could. He says I'm cute/pretty but it never went passed that. He practically played me for an entire year. Yet I never moved on, not until I met someone else who showed me wth I even saw in the other guy.. He's so much better.

  • I am going through this where the guy is playing hard to get and it just makes me like him even more. He gives me my space and he gets his space even if it takes him a month to respond. I enjoy that I have to chase him. It makes me wonder what he is doing and if he is thinking about me and so in turn it makes me think about him. I also do some of the playing hard to get too. Some girls like it and some girls don't. I am one that thought I would have given up if a guy did that to me but when it started happening then it just made me want him more. I was surprised at how I felt. Do both though. Maybe don't contact her everyday cause that can get annoying. I have guys who contact me everyday and I say not him again and I don't answer sometimes.

  • It's attitudes like these that make me ashamed to be a woman.

    • I don't have an attitude... I'm just trying to figure out something.

    • You're doing it wrong.

      The easiest and most efficient way to deal with this is to stop waiting around for him to text you and flirt back. Or at least talk to him. Don't just let him ignore you.

      That's what I meant by attitude. You're acting like a princess. It's okay, you can talk to him too.

    • I am talking to him too. I'm saying that he tends to talk to me, flirt and stuff, then the next day whenever I try talking to him again, he practically ignores me. It gets annoying after a while.