Girls, Why aren't Womanisers and Players ignored more by Women than Shy Guys and Nice Guys?

Question

NicoletteXO · Accepted Answer

Because shy guys and nice guys typically don't have the very important qualities women need in a mate.

Evolutionarily, we are wired to want a man who can protect us and our offspring. While a womanizer may come with many negative qualities, typically they have confidence, physical fitness and often some other kind of prowess in terms of life achievement. If push came to shove in a physically dangerous situation, most womanizers would likely be able to protect a woman better than a weedy shy guy.

Of course, ideally a woman doesn't want a womanizer or a 'nice guy'. They want a strong and confident man with a good heart and integrity.

However, particularly when women are younger, it is difficult for them to discern the difference between a womanizer and a confident man of integrity. Womanisers front with confidence, and they often lie. They promise the world and women believe them. It's only with a bit of life experience that they can tell the difference. So for that reason, womanizers probably get a lot more attention than they are due.

Being a 'nice guy' or a 'shy guy' is not a virtue. Having manners and respect for others is a virtue. But lacking confidence and letting other people walk all over you is not. It doesn't instil trust. In fact, it shows that the woman should not trust you, because if you can't protect your own boundaries, you won't be able to protect hers.

So, don't aim to be a 'nice guy' or a womanizer. Become a confident man with a good heart and you'll be a great catch, who will ultimately do better in life than a womanizer.

Nomina · Accepted Answer

They wouldn't be womanizers and players if they didn't know how to butter women to some extent.

I do agree that they should be ignored a bit more, but they can be so damned charming and funny. It can be tough. I don't sleep with them, but the attention they give in the pursuit of sleeping with me feels good 😏

meetkitty123 · Answer

I don't go for womanizers or players I like shy guys and nice guys. Finding a good one can be tough because obviously they keep to themselves and chasing them is tough because they aren't always in tuned they miss when girls are flirting with them. Sometimes it goes right over their heads. They may doubt themselves and say to themselves no she's not flirting. I think they may miss out a lot because if this. They migjt not think the girl is interested and the girl moves on after trying to get their attention and getting no where.
I have seen this a lot with shy and nice guys I'll flirst and they just dont catch on... I was flirting with a shy guy today and I ended smirking cuz some dirty thoughts came through my mind about the man and I could tell right away he took it as I might have been laughing at him. Because he quickly looked himself over as if he had something out of place like his zipper. I realized he didn't have much confidence in himself and this is where the main issue lies... Women are attracted to confidence.
You can be shy and be confident... Now those men are the most fun to date. Anyways I just ended up leaving this man alone... It felt awkward... His unsure behavior made me loose interest... Being timid and being unsure and lacking confidence are not the same thing. There are shy quiet reserved men who do feel secure enough to seek the girl but they are harder to find.

whirled_up_girl · Answer

I would much rather be approached/payed attention to by a shy guy or a nice guy than a womanizer or a player. Unfortunately shy guys and nice guys are usually very respectful of women and often don't approach them in public or pay too much attention to them for fear of making them feel threatened or uncomfortable. Or so I've been told by shy guys and nice guys that I finally had to approach myself, lol.

I tnink that's what drives both shy girls and shy guys to dating sites, the fear of being rejected in person or worse the fear of coming across as too forward or threatening.

Ez-Bri-Z · Answer

Probably because they try more often so they may strike out 4 times but land the 5th. If you are shy and not making any attempt but one then you could go 0 for 1 and have a worse success rate. Besides, sometimes we are looking for attention so its nice to get it.

It doesn't make them better mates or anything, just explaining why they aren't ignored as much.

kqueen · Answer

Because shy guys don't talk to women and Nice (tm) guys are usually just assholes who think they're nice but actually just expect sex in return for common human decency. Women fuck players because they're attractive, they're charismatic, they actually approach them, and women also like to have strings free sex sometimes.

Anonymous · Answer

They approach us the most (i. e. have the confidence too). And some of us mistaken this as real confidence when it's just a facade. But nice guys need to get over themselves. They're only "nice" because they don't have charisma and objective attractive good looks.

Anonymous · Answer

Because they attract low quality crazy immature young women. I really dont understand why some men are interested in the crazy gfs of these players just because they are beautiful. I have never ever seen a financially independent woman in her late 20s with a player. Young women are also more immature. I also heard that so called players "love bomb" aka give so much attention and love as possible to his prey till he manipulates her to give sex to him. Love bombing is a manipulating tactic to make a person emotional dependent on yoursel. So be careful if you meet such people

mathnerd · Answer

Something funny is that I've always found shy guys and nice guys more attractive. Maybe more girls go for the romeos because they're usually confident and physically hot (after all, they do something to attract so many women). And they give the impression that they would be good in bed, after going through so many girls. But the ideal man for most women has manners and respects her.

Seinna · Answer

Women in general don't like shy and timid guys. Men are supposed to protect us when we're vulnerable and therefore we don't like weakness.

I'd say a lot of women avoid players but sometimes you don't know. And women are drawn to confidence at least initially because that signifies strength.

It all boils down to women wanting strong men.

lolabunny101 · Answer

honestly, because nice guys/shy guys either lack the confidence or energy in pursuing a woman they find beautiful especially someone they meet initially! Whereas womanisers and players act sooner rather than later

Blackcupcake · Answer

because they go after women more than the shy guys… if a guy gives a girl attention then she could get intrigued by that, and she would focus on the guy giving her the attention

CuriousCat8797 · Answer

Beats me, I hate men that hop from one woman to the next. I don't find promiscuity attractive for either gender.

Anonymous · Answer

We have to put less effort into the womanizers and players. They are usually very social and easy to talk to. They know how to make us feel good and special and they are good at showing that they like us.

Shy guys need more effort, they are difficult to talk to at first because they usually are insecure and usually scared of us in the beginning and they are scared to show that they are interested so we just don't notice them.

Anonymous · Answer

Because most of the time when people misunderstand and think that a person (womanizer/player who is flirting) likes them, they start developing feelings for them too. Womanizers and players are more likely to know what exactly to say to swoon because they most likely have more experience in the dating world.

ChocoBat · Answer

Just... I hate womanisers but just don't ok? don't go down this path...

St37xy11 · Answer

The players are usually the ones to go out and grab your attention and make you see them. While the nice guys are the ones that hangout in the back and the girl doesn't realize they are there. The nice guys aren't trying to make themselves known.

Somegirl408 · Answer

why r u asking this like its something out of the ordinary, arnt alpha males considered more masculine so that would mean girls should like them. i mean its not that hard to understand

Anonymous · Answer

I am shy and nice girl so i want a shy and nice guy. I don’t care the others.

Ayanna240 · Answer

because womanizers and players ooze confidence and social skills. And just because a guy is shy, it doesn't mean he is a nice guy.

myabe123 · Answer

I actually identify these womanizers and players in real life as an adult, I fell victim to them in my teen years. Steer clear of them as an adult.

cloudspy · Answer

Because they put themselves out there and have confidence.

Babygirl_S · Answer

They are confident and make the first move. Many also look good. We can ask a similar question from guys-"Why aren't sluts and gold diggers ignored more than shy girls and virgins?"

Hangry06 · Answer

Cause if they are , then they wouldn't be womanisers

tatianamay · Answer

Nice guys should come out of their shell if they want to date a girl they like

SailorJ · Answer

If a guy doesn’t take the initiative to show interest in a woman, we usually aren’t making the first move. And a good amount of the time, those nice guys… aren’t really nice guys. Just wolves in sheeps clothing

ElizaPam · Answer

Because shy guys and nice guys ain't getting shit wet if I wanted that I'd date a girl I gotta have that dick tho

AmyEdwards901 · Answer

Womanisers/players are more likely to approach a woman than a shy guy. It's kind of like first come, first serve. Or a closed mouth doesn't get fed. A woman doesn't know you're interested unless you make it known and tell her.

Alyssa11 · Answer

Because we see through it and we’re not interested in being played.

anmor04 · Answer

Because nice guys don't hit hard enough so they don't catch our attention

PralineCream · Answer

I mean I avoid them but they seek me out.

FreyaRed · Answer

Bad girls like good guys

Girls, Why aren't Womanisers and Players ignored more by Women than Shy Guys and Nice Guys?

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