Why do guys make jokes or change the subject when talking about their feelings?

[Anonymous]

For example, if you know a guy has feelings for you, and yet he still manages to either joke around about it or change the subject to avoid actually saying it.

I mean, correct me if I'm wrong, but I figure if he didn't care, he'd probably just say so?

[GoodMemory32]

Because if you trick us, we might say we love you too easily and you'll take that as a further commitment when we might still be thinking. Well, that's one way to explain it. The truth is that guys get smacked emotionally a lot when their young often and it toughens up the mind. This also creates fear to people even very close to them. Guys take care of it anyway they can. Good luck getting to the heart of the joke, B.

[Anonymous]

Men are who show their emotions are thought of as being weak. Either guys learn to hide their feelings at a young age, or they become social outcasts with other guys, and are forever doomed to being in the friend zone with girls. You have to work at building our trust if you want us to open up about our feelings.

[tohrment]

Sigh. I do the same thing.

It's kind of a defence mechanism. You can turn something serious into something light hearted, so that if you're rejected it's easier to shake off rather than if you have laid out your (proverbial) heart and soul for them. It's not easy being vulnerable.

[Apodyopsis]

Ever since they were young, guys were taught to hide their emotions. That's something that stays with them. If you want him to open up more, you gotta make him feel as comfortable as possible. Give it time.

[moloz]

It's not just being taught, but being forced to... all these girls wanting around manly men made a negative (or positive?) impact on what-to-do-to-get-girls-better type of problems.

[Maarmaar]

Boys are just...like that. He probably doesn't show his feelings because he wants to seem tough around you.

[Anonymous]

I can guarantee you he won't talk about it in front of others, so the best place is to get him on his own and get him to talk about it, if you start doing it he might feel put on the spot and start joking again. Best way I think is to start joking and make it serious if you get me? Hope that helps :)

[Asker]

Definitely, it's just I don't get WHY he does it, you know? A lot of the time our conversations are private.

[Rick513]

Well, for me it's really hard to talk about my feelings as I will often be misunderstood. So if a girl means a lot te me I would think twice before saying it as I don't want her to think I am weird or anything

[FierceMegan]

He has an issue with rejection maybe.