How to flirt with a guy without looking easy to get or too into him?

[Anonymous]

[dynamicyandere]

Authenticity is always best.


But only when your authentic-self is the right person.


The right person will have 2 key traits:


1. High standards (within reason). You will not seem easy if you have high standards for guys. Particularly, non-superficial high standards. For example: You desire men with good character and are emotionally mature.


2. No desperation. It’s okay to be madly in love with someone. Acting desperate is different though. Desperation is about being desperate about fulfilling YOUR needs and putting to rest YOUR fears, e. g. fear of dying alone. Being madly in love on the other hand, it’s not about you, it’s about them. You love them for them. They aren’t just something to quench your fears and insecurities. You love them for them. That is highly attractive. But, you see, if someone dials things to 100 while they barely know the person, it comes off a desperation. Loving someone super hard is completely fine, but it needs to be from the right place, and your love interest needs to know and feel like you truly love them for them and they aren’t just some role to fill in your head. So it’s fine to be madly in love, but make it make sense.


Also, guys that have goals and purpose in life and have their sh*t together are going to be less likely to play mind games.


If you like to play mind games, you’ll repel guys that dislike them and the ones that enjoy playing mind games are the ones who will stick around.

[dynamicyandere]

As a general rule, if you feel like you need to artificially manufacture the chemistry in order for things to work, it means your natural chemistry isn’t good.

I’ve dated more than one girl who tried to put their best foot forward and pretend to be what I wanted.

But things fall apart eventually.

Because they can’t maintain that forever.

And when the facade breaks, you find out that they weren’t the type of person they tried to come off as.

And the chemistry is off, because it was artificially manufactured from the beginning.

If you want your chemistry to be effortless and lasting, then don’t pretend to be something or someone you’re not.

Otherwise, the stability of the relationship will depend on you maintaining that facade you created, indefinitely.

Either you will return to your old self eventually when the facade breaks — or you fake-it-til-you-make-it and manage to legitimately become the person that you’ve been trying to portray yourself as. (Possible, but significantly harder to do.)

[Monalisa77]

You seem the guys I've liked i thought we did have a spark to begin with, but whenever I try to make things happen it goes wrong

[Monalisa77]

I don't know whT kind of person I am, I'm going through those stages.

[dynamicyandere]

@Monalisa77 Hmm. Flirting can be tricky, since there’s so much nuance.

But, one thing to keep in mind is testing the waters and seeing how they respond. It’s like building a fire. You start with a little, and see how they respond. If they respond favorably, you can add a little more to the fire and see how they respond. If you add too much at once, you can smother the fire and the fire can go out. Depending on the person, the fire could be build quickly or built slowly. But the key is to observe their feedback, which will let you know what you can or should do.

If they are reciprocating, great, that’s a green light to add more fuel to the flame. You can dial things up a bit.

If they are neutral, as in nothing has changed with how they interact with you, you can take it as a yellow light. Don’t dial things up unless you suspect they are completely unaware that you like them. But just tread lightly, because you don’t know if feelings are mutual.

If they are showing signs of disinterest, then it’s time to dial things back. They are either disinterested in general, or things are just moving too fast and they need more trust built first.

[Monalisa77]

yeah i did that, i like even said i was cold and he didn't respond, but later on he carried on flirting/staring. i dont get it, why flirt/stare but whenever we had a chance to talk or something he didn't respond

[Monalisa77]

i mean i dont think my actions helped much but i wasn't even sure if i liked him and it was all very sudden lol

[Monalisa77]

i was ready to start flirting more next time i thought id see him. but he wasn't at the place we meet so i sent a message and he didn't respond. but I've always wondered if he even uses whatsapp and or was too busy working to see it? I don't know, there's just some weird doubt there might be a simple explanation for it. not sure if ill see him this Friday or not as its just a charity event but I don't know how to respond to him if he acts the same

[dynamicyandere]

@Monalisa77 Could you describe the way that he was flirting/staring? 🤔

[Monalisa77]

I've put it up on a lot of my qs, too much detail to go in to today lol im sure u'll find it somewhere on my page:)

[D_Bone_Steak]

I think a man will pick up on any interest at all. If it's non-sexual, he will entertain your thoughts and still give you the time if he has the brains to do it. I do it with kids and dudebros all the time. Believe it or not... there are ways to get to know a guy without getting all sexual. Not saying you have to stay non-sexual and use the gifts the Gods gave you in due time, but if that's all you use... the result is going to be about the same as any hawt chick trying to pull sway by putting the guy's dick in her mouth... or making him think about that happening a bit too much until he's not himself.

But if you're legit being a person and he is offended by your presence just because you didn't put out... he probably doesn't have close friends either in that case. Just acquaintances at most. You should consider that situation as dodging a bullet.

I fucking know I've done that with some really hawt chicks more than a few times.

[Ms_Facesitter]

By doing what you want to do and not get pressured into doing something you're not sure of. And keep asking yourself how well you know him. If it's not good enough to do something, you probably shouldn't do it.

[kinkynicci]

Micro mini skirt, no panties and a tank top. Bend at the waist to pick up your keys you dropped lol

[Dat-Alpha-Lion]

Would love if a girl did that in front of me

[Avicenna]

You have to practice to figure out what works for you. Just have a friendly convo.

[Summeroflove]

Lmao. Too easy how? To sleep with? Don’t have sex. If you’re interested in a guy. Show interest. If he doesn’t like you. Then. Leave him be.

[spartan55]

Don't get into worrying about looking easy, guys won't see you that way. Just let know you're interested.

[magiusX26]

in other words, "how do i tell a guy i like him without showing any vulnerability?" plainly put, you dont. the act of liking someone to that degree makes you vulnerable. to date requires vulnerability.

[Nice222]

I would suggest not being flirty just have a normal conversation ask questions and get to know the guy. Tell him a little about yourself. I think just being real and yourself is the best way.

[Billlewis]

Flirt with him while giving him the impression that you have another guy who is interested in you.

[JacobJordan]

You have to be obvious most guys don't recognize flirting

[Pohjolan]

Tell us where you draw the line at being too easy or too much into him and we'll tell you how much room to maneuver there is between that and the behaviour of women who are not interested.

[Asker]

i just want him to be confused whether i like him or not i don't want to make it obvious

[magiusX26]

@ asker. your reply here indicates you are into mind games, so unfit for a rationship. romantic relationships should not have such an air of confusion to them. going for confusion is adversarial and not potential life partner behavour.

[Asker]

@magiusX26 it's not like that I don't play games but it's just that i don't know that person well enough to risk it and make it obvious that i like him

[Pohjolan]

You can't really say that your objective is to confuse guys and then that you don't want to play mind games with them.

Anyway be really sweet at first and ask him out for a date.
Then during the date run out spontaneously, ghost him and refuse to communicate if you'll ever meet him.
That'll confuse the hell out of him.

[serious]

The question is why must you necessarily flirt.

[robhazelnut]

A house of cards is no shelter once the wind blows, which it will.

[Anonymous]

Why should it matter? If he thinks of women as "easy" sluts and whores, do you really want to date a man who thinks like that?

[Guido]

Don't play games. Just tell him that you like him and that if he asks you on a date you would say yes. Then leave it up to him.

[Jamie05rhs]

You don't have to worry about that. It's not important. Just go for what you want.

[pickles77]

It’s easy just do little things to show that your interested but don’t smother him

[Amara_09]

Don’t smile at him. Eye contact is the key!

[cosmosis181]

Uggh, I'm a fkboy and u got us figured out wtf😫Keeping a totally straight face is frustrating for us, I hate it! I always try to distract to break through it, but if ur a fkboy there's just NO way, we can't!! We end up with our jaw dropped down😖!!

[Tharithi]

If u are not into him why do u wanna flirt

[Jeronim]

without contact

[Anonymous]

By not being too easy or too into him.

[kevypatyy7]

Why would do that?

[Asker]

because i like someone