Cute guy at my job keeps eyeing me, could he be interested or running game?

[Anonymous]

I (f 24) have been working at my job for about 3 weeks and there’s this handsome guy who’s been eyeing me for quite a while. We’ve said hi to each other a couple of times and I would almost always catch him watching me walk away. We don’t work in the same section so we don’t see each other all the time, but when I would catch him staring at me he would have a look of interest or curiosity. I always smiled back and looked him in the eye for a little over a second just to show that I’m showing interest in him too.

Our most recent interaction was when I walked passed him after using the restroom and when I got a little distance from him, I felt eyes on me and turned my head, and lo and behold he was staring dead at me lol. I turned around flustered cause he looked so good.😭 But I turned around again and he was still staring so I smiled and waved at him and he looked taken aback and slowly raised his hand to wave back. I giggled and kept walking away.

That same evening, I was leaving to clock out and I saw him talking to a co-worker, I walked pass him and didn't look at him or say anything ( I was being shy asf). But I felt his stare on me the whole time. I grabbed my bag and went to clock out and after I came from the clock out room, I saw him by his station and he turned to look at me and started to walk towards me while avoiding eye contact. I was nervous cause I didn't know what he was going to say. He approached me and stayed a respectful distance and said my name to clarify if he said it right and I confirmed he did.

S. N. People rarely get my name right the first time they say it, so the fact that he got it right made my heart flutter lolll. And he had to have gotten my name from one of my managers cause he's cool with both of them.

He had walked away without saying bye and I had stopped him for his name and he gave it to me. I just said oh okay nice and walked away.

I wonder if he's showing interest in me. He seems kind and caring from what I observed.

[Anonymous]

3 weeks is not quite a while, it’s literally a matter of days and you hardly know this guy from the back of your hand let alone able to determine if he’s a shy dude or to know how he feels about what. You are new to the place, you’re a woman and you are conveniently there to flirt with since he sees you day to day. That is the nature of a man, that’s the nature of two conventionally attractive people who are chronically in each others face since they work together. Does that mean there’s any intent for it to actually leave the work place? Who knows but majority don’t want it and avoid it like the plague. Majority would advise against even exploring that route.

[Asker]

Mmh okay, can you elaborate more on “ you are conveniently there to flirt with” and he doesn't see me day to day, we don't work in the same section. I work in the back and he works at the front. We probably see each other for 5-10 minutes out of the work day, sometimes we wouldn’t see each other at all. So, we would barely have time to flirt. lol. But the times he does see me, he's eyeing me. And you're right majority would advise against it, but it’s my decision at the end of the day. I got out of a relationship with a narcissistic sociopath a couple of months ago, so I’m definitely taking my time to see how it goes. I’m not trying to rush anything. And no I’m not worried about my ex, he actually helped me to realize my worth and that I don’t deserve less. :)

[Opinion Owner]

I’m not quite sure why you feel as though I’m addressing your sense of self value or your healing process. I re-read what I said to check for any confusion and I don't know, maybe I just need to be more straightforward or clearer.

Interoffice dating is almost always a matter of convenience. Despite how little you believe you see him, it’s more than enough to start something and with all of these exchanges you mention it sounds like that is the case. You don’t know what’s going through his mind during these exchanges and for all you know this could be a matter of hyper awareness, you catch him staring or looking and vice versa. He may even be wondering similar things as you, like “what’s making her always be looking whenever I glance over”, it is very fair to assume he’s had the same thought process. But the intent behind it all is what matters, and usually interoffice romance is a matter of convenience without much intent at all. It’s too soon to determine whether he’s just having fun or what, we can’t even say that he’s taken full notice of this all I mean who knows, there’s no input from the horses mouth.

I guess ultimately I’m saying I don’t trust the intention because there usually is none behind taking interest in a coworker and it’s rarely ever fruitful.

[Opinion Owner]

And by matter of convenience I feel like that is super straightforward. You’re there, he’s there. If you’re single and conveniently attractive then yes, a man could engage. Who knows if he’s got someone back at home, but if he did then she wouldn’t know about you or any other woman because he is exactly where he’s supposed to be and there’s no suspicion.

[Asker]

I understand your point of view. I’m not overthinking it too much. I'm going with the flow, if something happens it happens if it doesn't then it doesn't. And I trust my intuition enough to know if there's someone else involved. The inconsistencies would show. And I've been in past situationships and everytime my gut told me they were lying about something or wasn't telling the whole story I always found out the truth. But I wouldn't mind just being his friend and genuinely getting to know him. Maybe something might just bloom.

[Opinion Owner]

Intuition isn’t fact, you don’t know what he’s got going on behind the scenes and honestly that’s not the point of my comment. If you don’t care about any of that and ultimately plan on going with the flow — great. You asked for our opinions on the matter and that’s what I believe. You don’t have to agree with my feedback and my purpose isn’t to change your mind.

[Opinion Owner]

I’m also not sure what your point in asking this was if you planned on defending and negating everything said. You should be more open minded to bias, because we are looking at things from a position you just aren’t in.

[Asker]

I'm not being defensive? I'm just telling you what I think. I took in your point of view and I honestly see it as negative thinking. Sorry I don't automatically see the worst in people. I asked if it seems like he's showing interest, I didn't ask if he's in love with me. I'm not trying to come across as rude or anything, but I'm not putting as much energy as you are lol.

[Asker]

And I try to be open-minded and I don't take things personally. Whats meant to happen will happen.

[Opinion Owner]

You can see it however you want, saying that interoffice flirting/dating is a matter of convenience isn’t a negative way of thinking, it’s a literal fact. Almost anyone you ask would say the same and it’s not negative it’s just been proven true time and time again for ages. Tell me how many of your friends or people you that have had success dating someone at work vs having it turn into a shitshow? Mhmm.

Stating that he could have someone isn’t seeing the worst in someone it’s simply a consideration and fair one given the fact that you’ve only known him 3 weeks and haven’t hand much conversation outside of him and bye. You don’t know what’s he’s got going on and nothing is wrong with me stating that. Yes, you are entirely defensive, and your response just put that on display. Not to mention that sarcasm and insults because why is responding to a conversation with more feedback than a couple of words considered “much energy”? Isn’t that what this site is for? You’ve been gaslit by men so much it’s all you know how to do to others clearly lol. Anyway this conversation is not productive. Good luck with the situation, or not.

[Opinion Owner]

Lastly no, you didn’t ask if he was in love with you. Jerk. I never implied such a thing anyway.

[Sam1133]

Why would any guy have interest in you. ?
Are you Emma Watson? Angelina jolli?

[Asker]

I see your comment as a joke.🤣🤣🤣 But I’m a black woman who is very beautiful. I get stared at everywhere I go, I have multiple guys (and girls) at my job who eye me everyday but I don’t pay them any mind. So, why would a guy have interest in me? I’m kind, caring, respectful. I say smile and hi to anyone who looks at me when I walk by me. I always offer help to others at my workplace. And I never take anything personal. And beauty shouldn’t determine if a guy will have interest. What happened to real emotional connection? And actually getting to know someone for their personality?

[Asker]

When I walk by**

[Asker]

And I meant I smile and say hi** excuse my errors😅

[Sam1133]

Well there is always long que outside public toilets,
So I'm not surprised if guys n girls standing in que for you...💀

[Asker]

Lol, you got a lot of hurt in your heart. I hope you heal❤️

[Sam1133]

You're right
Only you understand me 😭❤️

[slatyb]

He's definitely interested. If you want a date, ask him to lunch or whatever.

[Makeushiver]

I'm not sure of the difference between "being interested & "running game"

[In_Trance]

Get back to work before you get written up. It's a job not a dating club

[Asker]

Ummm, I'm sorry but my job isn't uptight like you lol!

[Noirette]

🤣🤣

[nojdug76]

Yes I think so