How to attract a shy girl? -please help-

[spikeneverdied]

I've heard in Psychology that a person might not like someone that likes them (even as a friend) because of low self-esteem. How can I make a girl feel excited (she says she's always bored) and feel better about herself. I think she's really cute, she's Korean, speaks perfect English but says she has few friends. Once she stuck her tongue at me as well as smiles and rarely replies back when I ask her if she wants to hang out. I asked her if she wanted to go to the movies and she didn't know how to respond because she doesn't go to the movies. Usually I call bullshit, but her tone really sounds innocent. Last semester in college she sent me a link of this video of a korean drama. When I first met her she mirrored me (sitting cross legged), I ve read that mirroring is a really good thing.

link

Any advice?

I will clarify or answer questions, I really want help.

[Atomizer]

I don't know about mirroring, but shy people often need a different approach.

I suggest being persistent, but also very gentle with her. Don't come on too strong or too often, but keep coming on to her.

Shy people can "spook" if they're startled, and escaping from the upsetting situation is the most important thing to them. So if she seems to run hot and cold, it might not be deliberate. She might follow the introvert pattern of acting, then thinking, acting, then retreating to think.

This pattern can lead to people thinking a shy girl (or guy) isn't interested: "I flirted and asked her out, but she said she wasn't sure and I didn't want to pressure her." But it's not that the shy person isn't interested, it's that they may need more time to collect their thoughts.

To repeat, I suggest being persistent, but also very gentle with her. Don't come on too strong or too often, but keep coming on to her.

[paulthree]

Most Korean parents are really strict about letting their daughters date before 18 or so, and a lot of them won't be happy about someone non-Korean anyway.

So be careful and take it really slow. See if she will go out with you and a group of mutual friends instead of trying to pair up right away. This might be more acceptable to her family and her.

[cali_katie]

Being a shy girl myself, I like building up friendships first. Maybe the movies or going to a restaurant alone seems a bit too one-on-one to her, which may make her feel awkward and self-conscious. Try taking her to a really public place like a party or just somewhere out with a group of friends where you can bond with her. The closer your relationship becomes, she'll definitely feel more open to the idea of dating you. Trust me. Good luck! :)

[ThatShortChic]

I'm highly shy as well so I can help you a little. Just continue being you and you should be fine. Us shy one tend to blush a lot when complimented, embarrassed, or teased. If she is being playful it means she is starting to warm up to you. Just don't make anything to awkward. We sometimes like it when your straight forward with us as well. Not sure if this helped much but I tried