Love Yourself!!!

So I've come across a lot of women who are much more beautiful than I am yet they don't see that beauty in themselves. I'm sure plenty of them have circumstances which led them to feeling this way or never had any support, but I would like to say a few things to women who seem to lack confidence or can't believe they're beautiful despite what people say.

Love Yourself!!!

The above is me. I freaking love myself. I wouldn't change places with anyone in the whole world, because every day I look in the mirror, I see someone that I find to be so pretty and that it makes me smile.

Every. Day.

Just a small background about moi: I believe I'm pretty as I said. If you asked me when I was 17, I would have been like many women on GaG--highly insecure and wishing I was prettier. I thought I was ugly because I couldn't get a boyfriend that I wanted. It didn't help that I was called "ugly" more than I was called "pretty" and the latter was usually done by women. It also didn't help that the only guy who seemed interested in me was my best guy friend, but I wasn't attracted to him (of course, I had delusions of grandeur about the type of men that I expected).

During my senior year of high school, my sister asked me why I cared about what people thought of me---not everyone's going to think that I'm pretty and you're not going to please everyone.

You might have heard this and it might not resonate with you, but it did with me. So I stopped caring and I felt much happier in my life not having to be bogged down with other people's thoughts of me and focusing on myself. I still do. I have now been called pretty/beautiful by more wo/men than I have "ugly". And being called "ugly" doesn't get me down as it used to....because I don't care and I know many people willl think that I'm a hideous wildabeast compared to other women.

It. Does. Not. Matter. Because I love myself...and no one will ever change that fact.

I want to share a few things that I've learned from journey that might help you all.

Love AND respect yourself. This is the most important step. If you look in the mirror and see someone that you loathe, that needs to change. Instead, whenever you catch your reflection and dote upon yourself, I would only say nice true characteristics about yourself. This helps build your self-esteem and the more honest and factual it is, the better you'll feel and the more confidence you'll gain.

Love Yourself!!!

Understand that there are going to be women more attractive than you are. I think this one of the hardest things for a lot of women to accept, but it's true. Whether you consider them more attractive or whoever you're interested in, there will be someone better looking than you. This is okay! If your guy wasn't interested in you (assuming you have one), then he wouldn't be with you. Understanding this fundamental truth will allow you, I believe, to be as I am--able to tell a more beautiful woman that she is pretty with not a single negative thought about myself and only wishing the best for her. :)

Love Yourself!!!

Immediately counter every negative thought that you have with a positive one.

A lot of people allow their horrid thoughts about themselves last more than a few seconds which causes them to dwell on them and degrades their self-esteem. As soon as you recognize such a thought, I propose that you automatically counter with a good thought about yourself and FORCE yourself to not ruminate on the bad thought of your image, weight, life--whatever.

Love Yourself!!!

Eradicate any delusions of grandeur and be realistic. In high school, the "man" that I was going to have would have been someone like Dave Batista naked in my bed or some hot model with a big penis with his ass and penis delicately draped by a lovely red sheet. (I've had this thought since 14 years old so I now realize that the 30 year old men that I was envisioning would have been pedobears...bahaha).

I've grown up and realized that I need to face facts--I'm not sexy enough to get that model (nor do I want one anymore). Staying in this realm will more than likely keep you from happiness, because there is no such thing as an idealized perfect man. Having such high expectations tends to be detrimental and that's what it did to me.

Love Yourself!!!

Don't let ANYONE get you down.
This includes parents, friends, loved ones, significant others, random strangers--and yourself. Allowing someone to have that type of power over you can stifle the growth of your confidence and make you doubt yourself.

Surround yourself with people who will support you in all of your endeavors and build you up when you're down instead of kicking you.

This doesn't mean be prideful and narrow-minded, unwilling to listen or tolerate other people's critiques. This means listen to what they say, internalize it, and disagree if they're completely wrong or tell them that they're right.

But NEVER let it affect you.

Love Yourself!!!

The above is what helped me gain the confidence that I now have. There are many different avenues to gain it, but I'm showing a route that you don't have to agree with but what helped me as a person.

I know though that whenever someone calls me "ugly", the first thing that goes through my mind is "So? Some people will think that. And why should I give a fuck about you? :D" A few years ago, I would have been about to cry.

I'm not going to lie--if it was an attractive dude, my self-esteem would take a hit...but I'd be right back up to my high self-confidence within 5 minutes and that dude is in the past.

I want EVERY woman (and man of course, but this is targeting women because I see more women than men with this) to feel as I do: confident, yet not cocky. Pretty, but not narcissistic. Smiling at their reflection as they pass....maybe doing a little dance (I do it. I know some of you do too). Good about who you are, but not doubting at all.

This is what I want for everyone who was in the situation that I was in, because I empathize and have been in that situation...and it's hard. But you can do it. I promise you.

Don't give up. ^_^

Love Yourself!!!
Add Opinion

Have An Opinion?

Most Helpful Girl

  • Ozanne

    "So I've come across a lot of women who are much more beautiful than I am yet they don't see that beauty in themselves."
    (What what makes you think they are more beautiful that YOU, Lovely Lioness?)

    "In high school, the "man" that I was going to have would have been someone like Dave Batista naked in my bed..."
    (I'm a Roman Reigns girl myself.)

    I love your words of inspiration! If more people thought this way, I bet there would be a lot less insults flinging around because people would know that they would be said with wasted effort!

    Is this still revelant?

Most Helpful Guy

  • GlamFelix

    I think... this was originally intended for women. But I also think that this is such a fucking awesome statement, and while hell yeah, every woman and girl should have the chance to read this, men should too! Anyway, very well written and hells yes you are beautiful! It makes me happy to see that you know and believe that with or without my opinion, and... well <3
    this is just awesome.

    Is this still revelant?

What Girls & Guys Said

  • aamy811

    I always read these self confidence posts and I've just accepted that this will never be me. I'll never be the girl whose really happy or pleased with the way she looks. And I don't think it's a bad thing, it's just who I am.

    • See? Self-detrimental thoughts that can be damaging later on in life.

      It is bad in my opinion because it doesn't make you feel good about yourself. You tend to settle into an existence where you think everything's fine until you see something you want... and then what you've "accepted" hits you with full force, making you feel horrible. This is what it did to me.

      It's a tough road. But it can be done.

  • Rapunzel2490

    It's ironic because when I was thin I was extremely insecure about my appearance. But now years later having curves and wisdom, I'm much more comfortable with my body and appearance. If you can't love yourself, how in the hell are you going to love anybody else?

  • KBob93

    Thanks for this. When I was 20, I was seeking validation, but got validation in my imperfections, not what I had good. I was struggling to be the sexiest girl on the planet (literally, gradiose thoughts) and so I hated the fact that I couldn't. But now I'm ok with myself, and that's why I really love Kate Upton. I have a body like hers, & she's helped me love my body.

  • Bonnie12I27I12

    what a great take :) it is important to think that you are beautiful. everyone should feel beautiful. it just bothers me when someone says "oh my gosh im sooooo hot right? like im so hot!" while it is important to think that you are beautiful it is still rude to FORCE people to compliment you. i think im very beautiful but i would never force someone to think that im beautiful. everyone has their own opinion (it doesn't always need to be shared tho). again, great take!!

  • KindHeartedBeauty

    Amazing take... we need. more uplifting women in this world like you! I tell girls all tge time don't compare yourself to others, you will never be them because you are you! You're spirit is beautiful also

  • AleDeEurope

    Not gonna lie, I never expected a take like this from you, and we've had out differences on this site several times, but this is a great take ;) More girls, well, people in general, should think of themselves like you do of yourself.

  • verticallyinsecure

    I have noticed u before and your answers before on this site. I am sure you have a lot of male haters by now ha ha but personally, i actually feel, you are a very sensible woman

  • GreatnessPersonified

    "I've grown up and realized that I need to face facts--I'm not sexy enough to get that model (nor do I want one anymore). "

    Sexiness is more than just looks; it's personality, charm, intelligence, as well as being good in the sack. I'm sure you are good at least one of those things. lol.


    ”Surround yourself with people who will support you in all of your endeavors and build you up when you're down instead of kicking you.”

    so important☆

  • weirdoldmann

    but I wasn't attracted to him (of course, I had delusions of grandeur about the type of men that I expected).

    at least you're honest!

  • MissPoirot

    Awesome take! Yeah, a few years ago I was insecure too but I guess every woman has that phase in her life. It is especially hard in high school. I am still in high school but I have grown past it and I love myself now. I also wouldn't change places with anyone in the world and of course I see other beautiful women but I never think that they are prettier than me. Everyone is different and beautiful in their own way and luckily I am very happy with the way I look! You are gorgeous by the way :) I really hope that other women will realise this because it is so painful to feel that way about yourself..

  • muspelhem_5

    Great and inspirational Take.

    If you're unlucky, someone will try to break you. Please don't let them do it. You'll regret it forever after.

  • Geekkie

    Greaat , it makes all of us (women) feel better :) Thanks for sharing !

  • desidoll

    Thanks for sharing. What a great take. We need to love ourselves.

  • thotramus

    if you are confident who you are, it is attractive...

  • Kaylove96

    Thank you for sharing. I've been at least somewhat better at loving and respecting myself. And there's this guy that keeps bothering me and I have this attitude and self talk where self love and self respect comes first. Part of it is not settling for less and not letting anyone have you or talk to you when they don't deserve you. I have to remind myself of those kinds of things and ignore them. If anyone says anything, I say "talking to him or even looking at him is not loving and respecting myself. I can't talk to or have anyone that doesn't deserve me and is no good. Otherwise it's bad for me and I'm not loving and respecting myself. It just can't happen!"

  • Northeast106

    Nice mytake, we all have to face reality and accept what we are.

  • hypno-trip

    Thanks RationalLioness I respect your presence on this website

  • apexalpha

    Nice take Having confidence boosts your physical beauty

  • ThatBritishLad

    I do love myself. Every evening for around 10 minutes.

  • MissResilient

    You go girl!

  • Not_Helping

    I wish I was pretty.

    • Kaylove96

      You wish you were a girl?

    • He's completely joking... lol. I don't think he wishes he were a female. He's just living up to his username.

  • nosweat2012

    You are beautiful

  • Ashely_Princess

    This is a very inspiring take :) <3

  • NaySay

    I don't love myself. I hate myself

  • phanindra554plus

    Nice take and good job😊

  • HoneyButterCup525

    Awesome take @RationaLioness ❤

  • seemeformore

    good one girl.. you are who you choose to be :)

  • Nathand

    I remember you once feeding me. Then you stopped

  • Anonymous

    "So I've come across a lot of women who are much more beautiful than I am" Lol, that shouldn't be hard to do

  • Anonymous

    Perfect timing for me, helped so much :)
    amazing take!

  • Anonymous

    This is an amazing Take!
    I've been struggling with my self-esteem issues for a long time. Some of the things you said described what I feel.
    I had some people telling that I'm beautiful and that they don't understand why I consider myself ugly. The thing is that no matter what I do I can't find beauty in myself.
    When I'm on my worst days, I can't even look at myself on the mirror. I feel gross!

    I would say that my low self-esteem is my biggest problems. It's hard to overcome those feelings. but I'm always trying. I know I can't give up.

    Your words are inspirational. Thank you for sharing this :)

  • Anonymous

    you look pretty to me :) thanks for sharing it helped

  • Anonymous

    What's wrong with your hair?

    • God, what an ignorant pussy... lol. Nothing. Short educational lesson: They're called microbraids. A small strand of hair is twisted into the braid. I parted it to the side for that pick because I like it better on the side than being split down the middle.

      Please refrain from asking ignorant questions because it's very hard for me to show any respect to individuals who do.. especially when it has nothing to do with the Take... lol

    • hypno-trip

      wow what a dick...

    • Anonymous

      What's the point of it?

    • Show All
  • Anonymous

    "some hot model with a big penis".
    So, all girls are beautiful, but only guys who are models and with big dicks are attractive.

    • Nice way to miss the whole point of the Take and not understand that attraction is subjective. Pretty stupid. :)

  • Anonymous

    In my experience, the more vocal someone is about having some sort of trait, the less likely they are to actually have that trait.

    • And your experience means nothing in the realm of overall reality. In my experience, most guys who have kids have been deadbeat dads. Does that mean every guy with a kid is likely to be one? Common sense says no. :)

      Also, this isn't being vocal about it. I'm not constantly saying it wherever I go. A lot of you guys on here need to grow a brain. :)