When a woman reaches certain points of her life, how she will be as a friend or partner says a lot about what you’re in for. Usually a woman has stages that society likes to break down in to decades (your teens, 20s, 30s, etc.) but I think there’s a bit more to it than age – though it does play a huge factor.
While many men have a lot of ideas of what all women are like in general, I wonder if breaking stages of life can help men determine why the women they date might feel the way they do and how a man’s own stage in life might compare with where she is in life. Find the age bracket and see if your relationship or friendship with her might coincide.
Ages 13-16
The youngest age to “date”, given that you are within a year or two of these years is based on a lot of restrictions and respect from her family. This is the time when her own parents are still trying to figure out why yesterday she was just a kid, and today she’s heading in to womanhood. She’s got a lot going on with her family life as they adjust to her changes and needs. She has little experience, but willing to learn so much as she is eager to break in to adulthood. The eagerness to get out and learn often times gets her in to the shoot-first-ask-later mistakes in her life. She isn’t entirely convinced of consequences, yet feels secure enough to make decisions against her own good. She’s smart enough to know right from wrong, but her willingness to please ends up getting her hurt in the end. Respect this time in her life to not add to the stress.
Ages 16-20
She’s finished with the nonsense at home, and determined to make adult choices. She truly wants to be removed from drama, however drama equates experience and still welcomes some trouble in her life to continue learning. She’s heading in to post-highschool plans and is deciding at this point where her priorities are. This is the feeling of having wings on her feet, and she doesn’t have to worry about bills, mortgages, house insurance, or anything else that weighs on her parents’ minds. She’s all about travel plans and seeing how a guy suits her personality. With so much personal activity going on with her, she’s still got the security of friends and family to engage with, making her busy and a tad unfocused on what someone expects of her.
Ages 21-27
The party years. The college years. The most fun and most memories that will be accumulated in her life will happen during this time. She’s realized the mistakes that her teen years brought her and is willing to move on to being a true adult. But this is really the first time she’s being one, so again, mistakes will be made on a different level. For example, does she truly know the importance of her credit score and how to obtain it? She gets the idea she needs to pay bills and be independent, but she’s at the first level of this adult stage and others might wrongly accuse her of being naïve or careless.
Not always the case! She is basing experiences from her last stage and getting her feet wet with true adult situations. She’s learning about money, work, and the seriousness of how she’s perceived as a woman. She’s also legal around the world. This new freedom of being able to drink, have sex, and do anything she pleases because no one is allowed to tell her she can’t do it are over now. She’s liberated and fun. With that may cause trouble if she’s not careful – which will add to her life experiences.
Ages 28-34
She’s probably thinking partying sucks. She’s been eyeing up her 30th birthday and it’s been getting her down. Once past thirty, she eases in to her ‘grown up’ self and doesn’t really care how her old friends or exes take that. She’s traveled, gotten her education and is likely easing in to a career or has worked a job for some time to acquire seniority. She’s important to many people in many ways now. She’s looked to by younger women to answer questions, yet she’s still a bit insecure with what getting older looks like. Is she going to have children, and is the clock-ticking making her more aware of the dating scene in a way she’s never expected. She’s looking at the secure side of a mate now, rather than the I-want-tall-and-a-nice-butt sort of thinking. She’s nesting. Even the ones who aren’t wanting to marry or have children are thinking of settling down as over ten years of drama and mistakes are a thing of the past – hopefully.
Ages 35-42
Well, I can only go as far as I am old, right? This stage is about wellness and peace. This is the woman who doesn’t care if she has to go to a movie alone or have a glass of wine on Tuesday because she feels like it. She’s earned her place heading in to forty and is caring less and less what people are thinking. Sex is back on the menu for being a good time, and she has no time to waste with people who are adding no value.
Motherhood may or may not have happened, but the instinct to share and nurture is there for others because she’s lived through many experiences, good and bad. People come and go from her life, so it’s not as big of a heartbreak anymore when she sees the end of something that was good. Yes, things still hurt, but she’s in protection-mode now as she heads for the next stage. She has big worries now, not just boy-trouble. She’s thinking of mammograms and RSPs. She desires love very much as she gets through this time, which is why she needs a partner who is willing to be her best friend.
Ages 43-55
I’m not there yet, but from what I’ve seen and been told by my omen-friends of these ages is it’s the I-don’t-give-a-shit years. Getting older doesn’t mean there’s no interest anymore, but it’s now got to be incorporated with real issues that usually surround money and health. There’s menopause, their kids telling them off, the spouse making threats to leave, and with all that she’s got to still be the strong one for everyone as they dump on her. If single, she could care less if a guy calls her back or if someone deletes them from Facebook – they simply don’t care because they see life now for the importance of other things. She realizes that this life is about her and she’s the only one truly going to take care of herself.
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Of course there are going to be exceptions to all of this, and I welcome women to share how they've summed up these stages in their lives, and men to describe how they perceive the women who have gone through certain stages.
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