The question constantly gets raised in many different forms and fashions. “How do I know if he/she likes me?” “What are the signs” First and foremost, I get the true problem. It’s really an asking of what the hell is going on with things, so much craziness that I need to straighten out. Then you throw in the mix of another person adding to the already festering turmoil that it becomes a swirl or madness in both light and dark regards. Life is without question the best roller coaster if you allow it.
More on point, in Non Verbal Communication there lies a very true statement (that perhaps has no exceptions even) “you can not, NOT communicate.” What this basically means is the messages you’re attempting to not send, are the ones you will send the strongest. You see this everyday as we all do. However the duality is also true, the messages you’re attempting to send will also be the strongest. If your of mathematical mind and can’t grasp how two polar opposites can be present at the same time, it’s just something you’ll have to see.
Another interpretation of the statement is the fact that although we can be very smart beings, we have flaws and limits. Sure you can monitor where you stand, the position of your feet, the tone of your voice, where you look as you say things, how you position your hands, ect. if you are unengaged in conversation and focused completely on this. However, once you become an active participant in something else notice how easy it is to not pay attention to the fact that you are frowning for a tenth of a second.
Let’s say that you hold yourself completely stiff as a board so that no nonverbal cue could possibly ever reach them. Well here’s the problem, you have just told the person you’re uncomfortable by not doing anything for such a long period. Needless to say, the little things that you would never thought holds meaning, does and can speak volumes. Ever hear the I have a feeling, a vibe, my gut tells me, instinct, intuition, ect. where do you really think this information stems from?
Regardless at this point you either choose to believe I get something or don’t that really is not the point of this. I have spent a ridiculous amount of time studying all the possibilities my feeble brain could handle of what every one of these mean. You want to know the results of all this research?
I am an idiot. Non Verbal Communication may very well tell you all you could ever want to know about a person. You could very well say, well this guy put his fingers to his lips as he was talking, so all the information he gave was a lie. You could uncover that although the cute guy was talking to you and it was a great conversation, his entire body was facing someone else. So really he was just trying to get someone's attention. This is not why I am an idiot. It is because every person reading this, regardless of your level already knows everything I have bothered to find out. Worse than that is you even knew all of it as soon as you where born. Perhaps even I dare say when you where a zygote. That is a speculative statement though.
When your gut, instinct, etc. tells you something is wrong with the person, your simply choosing to ignore it. When someone is hitting on you, whether you know it or not you’re smiling a bit, once again you’re choosing to ignore it. I’m by no means saying you have all the information in the subject "pre-programmed" into you so why bother to learn. I’m saying you have the genetic receptors built in. The reason some people get this stuff, and get how things work without needing to read up, is they also came with the owner’s manual. Maybe you just need to learn to identify what’s going on. When you’re in panic mode because you don’t understand things, perhaps it’s not a sign of something being wrong between you and that person. Perhaps it’s a sign that you need to figure out what that sign is, so the next time it happens, you get it. Ever had someone lick their lips while talking to you? Rather than ask what it means, perhaps ask what was that feeling you just had as they did it? Oh yes there is definitely a feeling..
More on point, in Non Verbal Communication there lies a very true statement (that perhaps has no exceptions even) “you can not, NOT communicate.” What this basically means is the messages you’re attempting to not send, are the ones you will send the strongest. You see this everyday as we all do. However the duality is also true, the messages you’re attempting to send will also be the strongest. If your of mathematical mind and can’t grasp how two polar opposites can be present at the same time, it’s just something you’ll have to see.
Another interpretation of the statement is the fact that although we can be very smart beings, we have flaws and limits. Sure you can monitor where you stand, the position of your feet, the tone of your voice, where you look as you say things, how you position your hands, ect. if you are unengaged in conversation and focused completely on this. However, once you become an active participant in something else notice how easy it is to not pay attention to the fact that you are frowning for a tenth of a second.
Let’s say that you hold yourself completely stiff as a board so that no nonverbal cue could possibly ever reach them. Well here’s the problem, you have just told the person you’re uncomfortable by not doing anything for such a long period. Needless to say, the little things that you would never thought holds meaning, does and can speak volumes. Ever hear the I have a feeling, a vibe, my gut tells me, instinct, intuition, ect. where do you really think this information stems from?
Regardless at this point you either choose to believe I get something or don’t that really is not the point of this. I have spent a ridiculous amount of time studying all the possibilities my feeble brain could handle of what every one of these mean. You want to know the results of all this research?
I am an idiot. Non Verbal Communication may very well tell you all you could ever want to know about a person. You could very well say, well this guy put his fingers to his lips as he was talking, so all the information he gave was a lie. You could uncover that although the cute guy was talking to you and it was a great conversation, his entire body was facing someone else. So really he was just trying to get someone's attention. This is not why I am an idiot. It is because every person reading this, regardless of your level already knows everything I have bothered to find out. Worse than that is you even knew all of it as soon as you where born. Perhaps even I dare say when you where a zygote. That is a speculative statement though.
When your gut, instinct, etc. tells you something is wrong with the person, your simply choosing to ignore it. When someone is hitting on you, whether you know it or not you’re smiling a bit, once again you’re choosing to ignore it. I’m by no means saying you have all the information in the subject "pre-programmed" into you so why bother to learn. I’m saying you have the genetic receptors built in. The reason some people get this stuff, and get how things work without needing to read up, is they also came with the owner’s manual. Maybe you just need to learn to identify what’s going on. When you’re in panic mode because you don’t understand things, perhaps it’s not a sign of something being wrong between you and that person. Perhaps it’s a sign that you need to figure out what that sign is, so the next time it happens, you get it. Ever had someone lick their lips while talking to you? Rather than ask what it means, perhaps ask what was that feeling you just had as they did it? Oh yes there is definitely a feeling..
Most Helpful Opinions