I've noticed that there have been a lot of posts lately about the problems that attractive girls and/or handsome guys face, so I felt the need to make one about ugly girl problems.
We live in a lookist society so unfortunately no matter how some people don't want to admit it, looks matter more than someone's personality (especially for girls). I think people are kind of like books. We judge them by their cover. No one will bother to read a book if it doesn’t catch their eye first. It may be a good read, it may be the kind of “book” people always say they want and are looking for, but if its cover doesn’t look interesting, it doesn’t look like i’d be a good read. But when the cover looks interesting, the chances of someone taking the time to read it, fall in love with it, and buy it increases.
When you're an ugly guy, you can find many ways to compensate for your lack of looks, such as humour, personality, intelligence, style, status etc. However, women have been traditionally known and expected to be the "fair" sex (as sexist as this may sound, I don't agree with it) so when you're an ugly girl none of these things actually matter. You are marginalized and overlooked by people. I could actually write a PhD on the subject but since there is a word limit, here are the most common (ugly girl) problems I could think of:
1. The loneliness
Ok anyone can feel lonely, it depends on your mentality, personality (if you're introverted, sociable etc.) but ugly girls have it worse for.. obvious reasons. We are naturally trained to avoid disgusting things because they may harm us-- poisonous berries in the forest, stagnant pools of water, etc. For some reason you believe that other people's physical attractiveness is somehow dangerous to you. Your attitude may just be your genes' way of protecting themselves against procreating with unevolutionarily fit candidates--in this case, what you have deemed "ugly". Another explanation could be that you are defensive against something ugly in yourself, and hating on those you think are "ugly" is your self's way of trying to distance it from that gross thing (without working on the ugliness in yourself). We have also been brainwashed by likely thousands of repetitions, every day of our life, by the media with images that promote a certain ideal of beauty that doesn't leave much room in terms of generic types for differences from this completely artificial and made-up norm.
In any case as an ugly girl, it feels like the world forgets about you. I only have a very close group of friends and family members that I can relax and tease and have fun but other than that, I'm invisible. It's not a case of "get out of your comfort zone", cause no one wants to be associated with an ugly person. Women don't see me as someone who will attract men to the group so I'm not invited along with their outings. Men never have an interest in dating me, and since I don't have any girlfriends around who they would want to bed/date , why hang around me?
2. No one sees you as a person or cares about you
No one cares about what you have to say even if your arguments are thoughtful and well articulated.. Even if you have to say the most interesting facts and stories to share with people. No one cares about your feelings, if you're gonna get hurt. At the end of the day you're just that ugly girl.. Not a person. I hate it when guys complain about girls being picky and not wanting them yet they take the absolute piss out of girls who are ugly. Or they don't reply to the unattractive girls when they try to speak to them. It's a rule. An ugly girl will be treated like rubbish by every single guy, regardless of their attractiveness or "status." If an ugly girl even asks for a pen from a guy he will get all creeped out and think she was hitting on him when she wasn't. It's all just down to male entitlement.
Even some of my closest male friends act this way and they're the nice type of guys.
Although I haven't done a research in the subject, I guess I'm not the only unattractive person that has been bullied for her looks. Especially in elementary and sometimes middle&high school, kids are cruel. I don't know if it's worse in high school or elementary school. Sometimes even in your adult life, people will say hurtful things. Most of the time they are joking, just trying to have fun. You won’t find it funny when the whole room is laughing about how big your nose is. If you happen to get in a fight with anyone ever (which let’s face it, is bound to happen sometime) they will likely throw some nasty insults your way. Just shake it off. Again, you can’t help how you look.
4. The battle for your self-esteem
From the girl two rows back in class or the celebrities posting their pictures on Instagram, there is always someone we wish we could look like. You wonder if you would be happier, sadder, or more confident. But anything seems better than how you feel about yourself right now.Every time you see an extraordinarily beautiful woman it will hurt you. It’s a reminder of what you “should” look like, and of how different you are. It will make you feel out of place, sometimes worthless. Our society is so vain and appearance driven how could it not? I actively avoid reading magazines or looking at make-up ads for too long. Why torture yourself?
5. You put on makeup, brush your hair, put an outfit together every morning and yet no one will ever notice.
You could spend hours putting yourself together but it will always go unacknowledged. The girl next to in class has gotten three compliments in the first 20 minutes of the lecture wearing sweatpants and a hoodie.
6. Whenever a hot person approached you, it was for only one reason.
7. On the rare occasion that someone calls you “pretty” you feel like they’re just saying it to be nice or maybe even lying.
Whether it's your grandma or your own friend when you're about to go out, you become suspicious of their intent. When they reassure you that you're not ugly, the next thought becomes, "So then I must be borderline ugly!" But you'll never be the person a random stranger (with no motive) tells "you're stunningly beautiful."
8. You're accused of being jealous of others.
If you ever happened to get into an argument with a pretty person and you say something slightly negative about their attitude or actions (not about their looks), you're accused of being a "jealous b**ch" even your arguments are well-articulated and everyone will take the other person's side. I people associate: ugly face-ugly/evil soul
beautiful face-clear/beautiful soul
9. You aren't allowed to have standards in dating
And I'm not talking about physical standards because looks will fade eventually one day but I'm talking about standards that have to do with personality, intelligence, loyalty, kindness, education, style. You have to date anyone that comes your way even if they mistreat you, are cruel, careless, shallow or just incompatible with your lifestyle because people tell you, you should be thankful and greatful you even got that
10. The struggle is real.
The best way I’ve learned to deal with it is to do your best to just not care. Just don’t. Our society is broken, it’s falling apart, and it’s wrong. There is no reason to compare yourself to other people or to have a standard you feel like you have to live up to. Global warming, starvation, war. Those are the issues. Not who wore what, not who’s the prettiest, not what you look like. I know this. Some of you know this. The whole world needs to know it too.
Just live your life. Enjoy it. Take it slow. And don’t give a FUCK what people think