How I Deal With Being Ugly


I am not the most attractive person. I don't attract many guys and the ones I have I only dated them because I thought I would never find someone. I used to hate going out with my friends; people would hit on them and I'd stand by and watch. I take the couple pictures when my friends would invite me out and I'd be the 5th, 7th, etc wheel. A guy I liked all four years of high school eventually dated my friend because she was better looking.

After years and years of feeling worthless and unwanted, of staying in because I don't want people to judge me, I got tired of it. Here's how I deal with it:

I stopped looking in mirrors.

The only time I look in the mirror is so I can do my hair for the day and that's it. I avoid looking at my face as much as possible. Now that I don't see myself very often I don't think about how unattractive I am. When I did look I would try to convince myself I liked what I saw but that wasn't the truth. Now I don't sorry about it. Instead I have an image in my head about how I look and I'm able sustain some type of confidence.

I realized my friends and family accept me for me.

Even though I am unattractive they still found something in me to love. I never feel like I have to hide my face or that I'm inferior to anyone. They are able to see how smart and kind and all that other jazz I am. Because of this I always make sure I do what I can to let them know how special they are to me. I support them all, I'm a wing man, the nice and helpful aunt, sister, daughter and friend.

I stopped trying to get a guys attention.

I've wasted a lot of time being with guys who treated me like shit because I didn't think anyone else would want me. It worked in the beginning but then things would get worse and I would let myself be emotionally abused, being ran over and used. I got tired of that. Now I don't worry about dating at all. I know most people look me and go WTF and trying to convince them otherwise was not working. Letting myself go through that shit was more harmful than anything. I've accepted that I'm going to single for most, if not all, of my life. Why deny it? Guys come and go, but my family and friends will always accept me and that's all I need.

Get a pet.

All animals need is love, shelter and food and they will love you unconditionally. They won't judge you, avoid you or run from you. They accept you and love You with their entire being. I have a dog and a cat and it's the best feeling in the world when I come home and they greet me. They sleep with me, spend the days with me, etc. It's a special bond that can never be broken.

I stopped comparing myself to my friends.

There's nothing to compare. They are beautiful, smart, have goals and people adore them. I will never be like them or keep up with them so I stopped trying. I don't dress up when we go out, I wear what I want. I don't try to present myself when I know I'm going to be shut down anyway so why not do what I want? I enjoy their company and friendship and didn't want to give that up and stopping trying so hard. So yeah, I may get left alone at the bar or dance by myself in the middle of the club while people laugh and stare but at least they're my real friends. They care about me and they want the best for me and that includes accepting my looks. Besides, it's more fun looking completely out of place than trying to fit into a crowd I have no place in.

I do things I enjoy.

I'm a good writer, I'm a very good dancer and I love cooking. Working at these things gives me a confidence boost and goals to work toward. Anytime I feel sad about the way I look or I feel defeated I do one of my hobbies and easily kick those awful feelings to the curb.

I also work on being a unprofessional comedian. Looking at me, it's understandable why I'm funny, silly and sarcastic. Being funny looking gives me material make fun of and make others laugh. I also make some funny comments about others or other things and for some reason people think it's hilarious so I just keep it going.

Being ugly doesn't have to be an end all deal. Yeah I'm unattractive but I'm working it and making the best of it. Beauty fades but you can always be interesting.

How I Deal With Being Ugly

How I Deal With Being Ugly
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