If she brings it up again that she's not interested in dating, just tell her straight out - "that's a shame, cause I'd really want to take you out on a date." If she is pushing you away even tho she likes you, she'll have to deal with it then and there. Maybe she'll go alright, let's give it a shot. Maybe she says sorry, not gonna happen - in which case you lost nothing. If she doesn't want you, drop it. But you need answers.
Hun, it just seems like a friend. You offered her a nice and patient arm to listen to her peoblems and she feels close enough to you to vent her frustrations. She sees you as a friend and thinks of you as a friend. She can be nice to you without wanting to bang you and there's a chance you misread her friendliness with wanting to be sexually close with you.
She hasn't been venting her frustrations or using me as an arm to cry on. I said she feels comfortable telling me certain things. We were both talking about our frustrations and exes.
@Gotcha_Writer10 I know I asked for people's opinion on this situation, but I gotta be honest: I feel like a lot of the women who are answering are talking more than listening, and listening more to their own feelings than what is being laid out about the situation. I know that women more often like telling a guy about when a woman DOESN'T like him because for whatever reason they favor that more than talking about if she does like him.
I'm not asking to be told what I want to hear. I'm asking for serious ideas that review the situation soberly, not just because you want to shout at me that she's not into me, just because that's an answer women are more obsessed with.
Ok one, im not "shouting" or whateva you think im doing. And i answered your question. She wasn't bullshitting you. From what you said about the situation, she said she wasn't interested in dating amd was sleeping with this dude for a good time. It seems like your mostly just reflecting your own disappoinment in the situation then just talking what she said and moving on. And sure some women do drag guys along, so do guys. But she earnestly just seems to want to hang and do things her why. Why didn't she jist open up like you want? Well, why does she have too? She isn't responsible for a guys feelings because he wants her. Same with anyone. Instead, you should have asked her earlier on where she stands and be honest, so no one was being dragged.
@likelyOK I'm not looking for what I want to hear, as I actually have agreed with many of the people who answered. But I feel like a lot of the women are just wanting to chalk it up as cut-and-dried "she's not into you" answers simply because women like telling a guy a girl he likes doesn't like him back. They just like shooting a guy down just because, and don't like thinking that their gender could ever be doing something as a No meaning Yes. So keep thumbing up everyone who answers who insults me instead of everyone who answers with a sober reflection even if it's not what I want to hear; you are only proving what I just said.
I agree with many of the people here saying she is probably just trying to keep me as a side guy, extra option, or just a buddy on hold. I don't believe she just wants to be "friends."
Dude, the only reason you asked this was to validate your own opinion on the matter. You clearly have your own belief on the matter, no matter who wrong you are. So just stop chatting if you dont want to hear it 😂✋
I think she's just waiting for you to take the lead in the pursuing/courtship. When someone says they don’t want to date anyone, that just means that they currently have no feelings for someone, at least no serious feelings. But this can change. You can start to make it more obvious that you're into her, and would like to be with her or at least try.
This may make her change her mind! But of course it's your choice on what to do
Oh and to answer your question I would probably say the same thing she's saying. It's really because we want you to see us as worthy instead of a complete hoe. lol
"What do you mean by "sexually decent?" " - I mean how women can pretend to be celibate or not a ho sleeping around with other guys just to make a guy they like think that she's being reserved and not sexually active even though she is.
Either way, she said and is not interested in you right now. Whether she just wants you as a friend or is not ready for anybody, what difference does it make?
She never said she wasn't interested in ME, she said she wasn't interested in being in any relationship right now. But when we hang out she acts differently from what she says.
@EGarzona I'm not trying to change her mind. Where is this coming from? She is the one who keeps suggesting we get together at her place and do things. She comes when *I* call. She meets me when *I* ask her to meet me. So that's why I really don't know what's going on.
Ah OK, she didn't actually say this.. but still it sounds like it could be one of these classic excuse to not be with someone. I'm not sure how exactly she's acting around you but sometimes girls' can be misinterpreted. So looking at the facts 1. She's not sleeping with you 2. She's not in a romantic relationship with you 3. She told you she's not ready for anyone 4. She's sleeping with someone else 5. She told you she's not over her ex 6. She knows you like her and still not making a move instead said she's sorry... Bla bla (sorry can't remember what she said ) On the other hand 1. She keeps suggesting hanging out 2. She s keen to hang out with you Given these facts. Sounds like a buddy to me. That's exactly how I act with my male best friends, I always want to hang out and respond quickly.. Because I enjoy their company a lot but Nothing else. Always gave them hints about not being interested in them. Sleep with with other people...
@sensogal 1 & 2: how soon is someone supposed to sleep with you or be in a romantic relationship to show they're into you? 3. Not looking for a relationship, yet seemed disappointed when I told her I didn't want any kids when she said she wanted 2. 4. Sleeping with someone else, yet now claiming she hasn't been sleeping with him lately. If I'm just a friend she shouldn't care whether I know or think she's sleeping with anybody. 5. Not over her ex, yet seems like she's really looking for someone to help her forget about him. 6. Knows I like her and wants to seem like she's not being sexually loose with anybody. Again, if I was just a friend, she shouldn't give a damn what I think about her sex life.
I'm not saying you're wrong, but I'm not saying you're entirely right either.
Woman are attracted to men who are friendly, yet aloof. If you really like a girl and your not sure if she likes you. Don't gush over her and never tell her you like her. You have to be cook and kind yet aloof. Sound like a game? It is.
It sounds like you're in the friend zone it sounds like in the beginning there was some possible feelings of something more but possibly you waited to long and let it hit the friend zone and with some chicks it's next to impossible to come back from the friend zone. I would say just be good with being her friend if you can't do that then tell her how you feel and tell her you can't just be her friend and end it. Don't be sappy or emotional just be direct and calm.
1
0 Reply
Anonymous
(30-35)
+1 y
Women will fuck a random guy she barely knows less than 10 minutes when she is out whoring with her friends. But when they find a guy the know has value and morals, they will fake their morals to try and trick him into thinking she has more value than she actually does.
Sexually decent I guess that most average to below average women can have sex basically whenever they want but want a serious relationship more and those are harder for a woman to get so any potential partner they like they want them to think of them as sexually decent because they know men dont want a serious relationship with a promiscuous woman at least not good men.
This all enlightening to me. I would keep my door open for other women and dates and see what happens. If for some reason she tries to do more with you then she is into you but if she lets you go with other women and she doesn't care then maybe she isn't the one.
My personal opinion, but time to turn the feelings switch off and let her do the pursuit. No need to be cold, but she might be just enjoying the attention, and to be honest, if she's fucking another co-worker, you need to think about what she's telling him about you. If it were me, I'd back off. If she wanted to know why, I'd be honest and tell her I enjoy the friendship, and was interested in her romantically, but she had way too much going on fir me to be anything more than friends.
I think its more along the lines of the second possibility you mentioned, but if you feel like there are too many mind games going on, talk to her about it.
1. "I also think she's bullshitting about not being interested in dating anybody." I've said this before to reject guys indirectly. So this is my interpretation.
2. "doesn't want me to think of her as a ho." Then why would she casually and comfortably tell you that she has a friends with benefits in the first place?
when a girl says she's not interested in dating right now, she's just not interested in dating you, I'm sure if someone she wanted to date came along she would.
she sees you as a friend at least like a closer friend, which is still a good thing. She sounds like she mentioned she hasn't seen her fukbuddy cause maybe it's been rough between them lately and might of hinted at you being the next one.
I think you should move on if you don’t like head games. You’ve already got that going on with her. It’s not going to work out well for you no matter how much you try to figure her out.
I'm not going to accuse her. I'm just gonna tell her I don't wanna be that guy who isn't sexually or physically attractive to her who has to settle for just being a friend. She'll understand what that means.
I said IF your feelings are making you bitter toward her. I didn't say you are.
But if you go on having feeling for her and continue to be her friend it's not unlikely that you will get bitter watching her moving on having sex with other men.
@PinkMichae No, that is what you were trying to say. Not as hypothetical. Because despite my confusion I never once suggested feeling bitter or even that it could get to that point. However I probably am going to cut it all off next time I see her.
Cuz guys want to just bang on a slut, dump their load and move on, cuz that is all she is good for. A nice decent girl, is one worthy of respect, love, caring and tenderness. She is one who wouldn't do those slutty things and is one who would never embarrass you,. Your family and friends would approve of her and even like her.
0
0 Reply
Anonymous
(25-29)
+1 y
Ditch the girl. Maybe try play her and make a point that you’re not interested in her to make her want you then decide if you want her not. She’s sounds trash. For a girl to be hooking up when she could find a meaningful relationship
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If she brings it up again that she's not interested in dating, just tell her straight out - "that's a shame, cause I'd really want to take you out on a date."
If she is pushing you away even tho she likes you, she'll have to deal with it then and there. Maybe she'll go alright, let's give it a shot. Maybe she says sorry, not gonna happen - in which case you lost nothing.
If she doesn't want you, drop it. But you need answers.
Hun, it just seems like a friend. You offered her a nice and patient arm to listen to her peoblems and she feels close enough to you to vent her frustrations. She sees you as a friend and thinks of you as a friend. She can be nice to you without wanting to bang you and there's a chance you misread her friendliness with wanting to be sexually close with you.
She hasn't been venting her frustrations or using me as an arm to cry on. I said she feels comfortable telling me certain things. We were both talking about our frustrations and exes.
My statement still stands dude.
@Gotcha_Writer10 I know I asked for people's opinion on this situation, but I gotta be honest: I feel like a lot of the women who are answering are talking more than listening, and listening more to their own feelings than what is being laid out about the situation. I know that women more often like telling a guy about when a woman DOESN'T like him because for whatever reason they favor that more than talking about if she does like him.
I'm not asking to be told what I want to hear. I'm asking for serious ideas that review the situation soberly, not just because you want to shout at me that she's not into me, just because that's an answer women are more obsessed with.
Ok one, im not "shouting" or whateva you think im doing. And i answered your question. She wasn't bullshitting you. From what you said about the situation, she said she wasn't interested in dating amd was sleeping with this dude for a good time. It seems like your mostly just reflecting your own disappoinment in the situation then just talking what she said and moving on. And sure some women do drag guys along, so do guys. But she earnestly just seems to want to hang and do things her why. Why didn't she jist open up like you want? Well, why does she have too? She isn't responsible for a guys feelings because he wants her. Same with anyone. Instead, you should have asked her earlier on where she stands and be honest, so no one was being dragged.
I feel you only want to hear what you hope the situation is, but it's clearly a friends only situation.
@likelyOK I'm not looking for what I want to hear, as I actually have agreed with many of the people who answered. But I feel like a lot of the women are just wanting to chalk it up as cut-and-dried "she's not into you" answers simply because women like telling a guy a girl he likes doesn't like him back. They just like shooting a guy down just because, and don't like thinking that their gender could ever be doing something as a No meaning Yes. So keep thumbing up everyone who answers who insults me instead of everyone who answers with a sober reflection even if it's not what I want to hear; you are only proving what I just said.
I agree with many of the people here saying she is probably just trying to keep me as a side guy, extra option, or just a buddy on hold. I don't believe she just wants to be "friends."
Dude, the only reason you asked this was to validate your own opinion on the matter. You clearly have your own belief on the matter, no matter who wrong you are. So just stop chatting if you dont want to hear it 😂✋
@Gotcha_Writer10 I was already long done talking to you, you didn't need to respond.
Damn, that’s tough
👌😂
I think she's just waiting for you to take the lead in the pursuing/courtship.
When someone says they don’t want to date anyone, that just means that they currently have no feelings for someone, at least no serious feelings. But this can change. You can start to make it more obvious that you're into her, and would like to be with her or at least try.
This may make her change her mind! But of course it's your choice on what to do
Oh and to answer your question I would probably say the same thing she's saying. It's really because we want you to see us as worthy instead of a complete hoe. lol
Do you intend to keep working at the same job? Is one of you leaving? I would avoid dating someone you work with.
What do you mean by "sexually decent?" Not telling you every detail of her life is not quite the same as lying.
When a woman says "I'm not looking for a relationship right now," it usually means "I don't see you that way. Please don't pursue me."
"What do you mean by "sexually decent?" "
- I mean how women can pretend to be celibate or not a ho sleeping around with other guys just to make a guy they like think that she's being reserved and not sexually active even though she is.
I don't see much correlation between human decency and sexual activity
Either way, she said and is not interested in you right now. Whether she just wants you as a friend or is not ready for anybody, what difference does it make?
She never said she wasn't interested in ME, she said she wasn't interested in being in any relationship right now. But when we hang out she acts differently from what she says.
Only time will tell but I don't know if you should bet on her changing her mind even when she is ready.
@EGarzona I'm not trying to change her mind. Where is this coming from? She is the one who keeps suggesting we get together at her place and do things. She comes when *I* call. She meets me when *I* ask her to meet me. So that's why I really don't know what's going on.
Ah OK, she didn't actually say this.. but still it sounds like it could be one of these classic excuse to not be with someone. I'm not sure how exactly she's acting around you but sometimes girls' can be misinterpreted. So looking at the facts
1. She's not sleeping with you 2. She's not in a romantic relationship with you
3. She told you she's not ready for anyone
4. She's sleeping with someone else
5. She told you she's not over her ex
6. She knows you like her and still not making a move instead said she's sorry... Bla bla (sorry can't remember what she said )
On the other hand
1. She keeps suggesting hanging out
2. She s keen to hang out with you
Given these facts. Sounds like a buddy to me. That's exactly how I act with my male best friends, I always want to hang out and respond quickly.. Because I enjoy their company a lot but Nothing else. Always gave them hints about not being interested in them. Sleep with with other people...
@sensogal 1 & 2: how soon is someone supposed to sleep with you or be in a romantic relationship to show they're into you?
3. Not looking for a relationship, yet seemed disappointed when I told her I didn't want any kids when she said she wanted 2.
4. Sleeping with someone else, yet now claiming she hasn't been sleeping with him lately. If I'm just a friend she shouldn't care whether I know or think she's sleeping with anybody.
5. Not over her ex, yet seems like she's really looking for someone to help her forget about him.
6. Knows I like her and wants to seem like she's not being sexually loose with anybody. Again, if I was just a friend, she shouldn't give a damn what I think about her sex life.
I'm not saying you're wrong, but I'm not saying you're entirely right either.
Woman are attracted to men who are friendly, yet aloof. If you really like a girl and your not sure if she likes you. Don't gush over her and never tell her you like her. You have to be cook and kind yet aloof. Sound like a game? It is.
Funny that you say that, because that is exactly the way I've been trying to act with her too.
It sounds like you're in the friend zone it sounds like in the beginning there was some possible feelings of something more but possibly you waited to long and let it hit the friend zone and with some chicks it's next to impossible to come back from the friend zone. I would say just be good with being her friend if you can't do that then tell her how you feel and tell her you can't just be her friend and end it. Don't be sappy or emotional just be direct and calm.
Women will fuck a random guy she barely knows less than 10 minutes when she is out whoring with her friends. But when they find a guy the know has value and morals, they will fake their morals to try and trick him into thinking she has more value than she actually does.
This is actually super true!
Sexually decent I guess that most average to below average women can have sex basically whenever they want but want a serious relationship more and those are harder for a woman to get so any potential partner they like they want them to think of them as sexually decent because they know men dont want a serious relationship with a promiscuous woman at least not good men.
Do these good men are pure innocent virgin themself?
This all enlightening to me. I would keep my door open for other women and dates and see what happens. If for some reason she tries to do more with you then she is into you but if she lets you go with other women and she doesn't care then maybe she isn't the one.
My personal opinion, but time to turn the feelings switch off and let her do the pursuit. No need to be cold, but she might be just enjoying the attention, and to be honest, if she's fucking another co-worker, you need to think about what she's telling him about you. If it were me, I'd back off. If she wanted to know why, I'd be honest and tell her I enjoy the friendship, and was interested in her romantically, but she had way too much going on fir me to be anything more than friends.
Same reason you pretend to have good credit when you go ask for a loan
Omg🤣🤣🤣🤣
I think its more along the lines of the second possibility you mentioned, but if you feel like there are too many mind games going on, talk to her about it.
1. "I also think she's bullshitting about not being interested in dating anybody."
I've said this before to reject guys indirectly. So this is my interpretation.
2. "doesn't want me to think of her as a ho."
Then why would she casually and comfortably tell you that she has a friends with benefits in the first place?
It doesn't matter now because I'm no longer interested in her and I've been fucking someone else now.
when a girl says she's not interested in dating right now, she's just not interested in dating you, I'm sure if someone she wanted to date came along she would.
she sees you as a friend at least like a closer friend, which is still a good thing. She sounds like she mentioned she hasn't seen her fukbuddy cause maybe it's been rough between them lately and might of hinted at you being the next one.
She's probably a hoe. She just likes the attention you give her. Sorry man.
Yeah, could be.
I think you should move on if you don’t like head games. You’ve already got that going on with her. It’s not going to work out well for you no matter how much you try to figure her out.
I'm not going to figure her out. I'm going to tell her I know what she's doing and end it. Whether she likes it or not.
Be careful about accusing her. You really don’t have any proof. It will make you look paranoid.
I'm not going to accuse her. I'm just gonna tell her I don't wanna be that guy who isn't sexually or physically attractive to her who has to settle for just being a friend. She'll understand what that means.
Yeah I would just tell her that you’re not interested in just friendship and that you need to move on.
You should stop being her friend if your feelings are making you bitter toward her.
Who said I felt bitter towards her?
I said IF your feelings are making you bitter toward her. I didn't say you are.
But if you go on having feeling for her and continue to be her friend it's not unlikely that you will get bitter watching her moving on having sex with other men.
@PinkMichae No, that is what you were trying to say. Not as hypothetical. Because despite my confusion I never once suggested feeling bitter or even that it could get to that point. However I probably am going to cut it all off next time I see her.
Cuz guys want to just bang on a slut, dump their load and move on, cuz that is all she is good for. A nice decent girl, is one worthy of respect, love, caring and tenderness. She is one who wouldn't do those slutty things and is one who would never embarrass you,. Your family and friends would approve of her and even like her.
Ditch the girl. Maybe try play her and make a point that you’re not interested in her to make her want you then decide if you want her not. She’s sounds trash. For a girl to be hooking up when she could find a meaningful relationship
I did think of that, yeah.