Being the perfect gentleman does women's still prefer it and does men still do it? (about 5 min read)


Good day Gag Community.

I recently read a article that mentioned that some feminist don’t prefer men to be the traditional Gentleman for example opening car door taking her jacket or even lending yours to cover her shoulders when its cold out.

I then tough to myself there are so many traditions that got lost during time and I did some research and found the following

He stands when she walks in the room
He stands when she walks in the room

1. He stands when she walks in the room
In the old days, men used to stand up out of respect when a lady walked in the room. It was a sign of respect and humbleness. Today, men will stand out of courtesy when a guest visits a meeting or in a court room. A gentleman will stand from his table when he’s introduced to a guest. Standing shows you are attentive and you care and show respect as every lady deserves.

He walks by her on the outside
He walks by her on the outside

2. He walks by her on the outside, closest to the street
Why is the topcoat symbolic of the gentleman? Before our drainage systems, a man stood on the outside of the sidewalk in a long coat to protect her from the dust and sewage that could splash up as horse carriages passed by. Sewage was common in the streets. The act of the man laying his coat over a puddle for her to walk over meant he was protecting her feet from fecal material more than rainwater.

Today should be not much different, a gentleman might stand in the way of puddles splashing up from traffic, or in the event a car veers onto the sidewalk. Symbolically it might mean he’ll always be by her side to protect her, through thick and thin..

He opens the door for her
He opens the door for her

3. He opens the door for her
A gentleman would help her up into the car as a sign of his protection and strength. Women would hold their dresses up in the old days as they were often long and heavy. The gentleman opened the door for her so she wouldn’t have to drop her dress in the dirt.

The modern gentleman helps her in and out of the car to stand in the way of creepy gawkers. To open a door for a lady is not a sign that she is week or incompetent but rather a gesture of affection and care.

He never criticizes a home-made meal
He never criticizes a home-made meal

4. He never criticizes a home-made meal
An out-loud criticism of a meal as a guest was considered disrespectful to the host. If anyone takes the time and effort to make a dinner, they are your host. Honor them. Smile and chew. Its not to say that you might not give a gentle hint or tip to correct the meal, after all if you smile an knob the hole time you might have to eat that again sometime. Just don’t be rude or insulting perhaps work it in to a conversation somewhere.

He doesn’t LOL for the sake of attention
He doesn’t LOL for the sake of attention

5. He doesn’t LOL for the sake of attention
“Frequent and loud laughter is the characteristic of folly and ill-manners…” Letters to His Son on the Art of Becoming a Man of the World and a Gentleman (1746). He might write an “LOL” over text in the present, but a gentleman doesn’t have to be loud to command attention. He commands attention through his strong character and charming ways.

He pulls out her chair
He pulls out her chair

6. He pulls out her chair
It was common for the gentleman to pull out her chair and allow her to face the open room. Today, the gentleman pulls out her seat, and sits facing away from the crowd and the TV because he doesn’t want to be distracted from his priority when he forgets to take his Ritalin. This also shows that the lady at your table have you undivided attention

He sits after she sits
He sits after she sits

7. He sits after she sits
“…and at the table wait until she is seated, indeed wait until every lady is seated, before taking your own place” The Gentlemen’s Book of Etiquette, and Manual of Politeness (1860). Talk show hosts continue this tradition today by waiting to sit until after their guest has sat down. If Oprah does it, so can you. She is your guest. Allow her to sit first. In case where it is not your guest it still shows that you are mannered enough to show the lady to respect she deserves.

He helps her put on/take off her coat
He helps her put on/take off her coat

8. He helps her put on/take off her coat
Up through the Edwardian period, women wore multiple layers, and beneath them a restricting corset. A gentleman would help his lady put on and take off her coat because of her restricted movement. Corsets are not common today, but many women still enjoy the help of a gentleman.

He doesn’t walk ahead of her
He doesn’t walk ahead of her

9. He doesn’t walk ahead of her
Because ladies wore long dresses and could trip on them, the gentleman walked behind her when climbing a staircase. Tumbling down a flight of stairs isn’t a good way to end a date. Today, the gentleman follows this etiquette rule because she might be wearing high heels or a long dress. This is another sign of him protecting her. However, she may want him to walk upstairs first if she’s wearing a short skirt.

He gives up his seat to her
He gives up his seat to her

10. He gives up his seat to her if there is only standing room
A gentleman offers his seat to a lady if there are no other seats. I’m talking to you…the dude who wouldn’t give his seat up to the pregnant lady or any lady for that matter.

So what do you think lady’s would you prefer if the guys are still doing these thing an men, are you still being respectful in this manner or have times change it, your opinion would be highly appreciated. I personally still do most of these and feel that being a gentleman is a must as women deserve the respect and manners cost nothing.

Being the perfect gentleman does women's still prefer it and does men still do it? (about 5 min read)
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Most Helpful Girls

  • Smoke-n-Growls
    Aside from points 4 and 5 for me, I'd be very happy (though admittedly caught off guard and slightly suspicious until it's consistently displayed and not an obvious "nice guy" ploy) for a man (or woman) to do those things for me.

    I take issue with points 4 and 5 for the following reasons.

    4 - I take pride in my cooking ability and enjoy improving. If something is wrong or could be improved, I want to know about it. It isn't a judgement of my worth as a person, it's an actionable piece of feedback I can use to improve my skills. A proper gentleman should know how to (and when to) provide this constructive feedback. An ideal time is discussing the meal while he does dishes or we share dish duty.

    5 - I may be misinterpreting this point, so feel free to clarify. But I'd prefer a man who laughs freely and openly. A hearty laugh has a way of warming the soul. A genuine laugh has a way of transforming a room. Not only do I want gentlemen who are unafraid to show joy, but I want a man confident enough to laugh with heart. He doesn't do it for attention, he does it because it's genuine. Genuine people, I've found, tend to command rooms easily and have strong presence. Disingenuous people tend to shrink into the background and try to "pick" the face that works best.

    I also think it's interesting to see cultural differences. I have a close friend who grew up in Uganda and Rwanda. Ambushes when entering a building were common, so it is commonplace for men to go in first - to defend against the ambush and give the woman a chance to flee.
    Is this still revelant?
    • In regard to point 5 a Harty lough or genuine expression of happiness or amusement is perfectly acceptable, although and this is where culture might play a role, where I am from men often react outrageous or almost childish like manner with outrageous laughing or loud silly gestures.

      I love the fact that you mentioned your friend in Uganda, so I am from south Africa and with the insane crime rate we have we are in a similar situation, I will still open the door of a building for instance at a hotel or store where it’s a glass door and you can see the entrance or hold the door when I am using the entrance and the are ladies coming in or out in order to give them right of way, although when you get home or unlock the office in the morning we as men (men being armed of here is almost a norm and some ladies will also carry a side arm) tend to go in first and to some extend that in certain areas in the country a lady will wait in the locked car until it is safe to exit.

      Hope that answer the question you hand and thank you so much for the opinion I loved it. I hope you enjoyed the mytake.

    • My sincere apologies I did not even great you Good day Ms. @smoke-n-growlsSmoke-n-Growls

      to conclude on your insightful opinion and thanks for the comprehensive explanation.

      In regard to point 4 I strongly agree with you that if something is wrong or can be improved on a guy or any person for that matter should be able to know when and how to discreetly or rather sensitively give feedback, although ass I said it was only in the olden days where men used to stay quote and eat.

    • Ah, no worries on the greeting - your reply is greeting enough. :D

      I've heard crime is very bad in South Africa. I had neighbours who moved to Canada from there after their dog - who had just been a puppy at the time - was badly beaten during a break in. Though it's concerning, it's very nice to hear a perspective from a country where the lifestyle is fairly different. Where I live, it's rare to find anyone with a gun.

      Thanks for your clarification on the laughing point. Growing up with a lot of French-Canadians, I'm more comfortable around loud laughter and silly gestures, ha ha! We like our expressiveness here, ha ha!

      Have a great day, George. :D

    • Show All
  • FeralChihuahua
    Don’t listen to the other guy lol but definitely need to have some gentlemen aspects. Doesn’t have to be 100% but at least to where I know that he’s trying. I see that girls that want a relationship pay more attention to the gestures a guy does on a date , rather than a girl that just wants to hook up. So in the end it just really depends on the girl.
    Like 1 Person
    Is this still revelant?
    • Good day FeralChihuahua

      lol thanks for the warning on our Anonymous friend but I agree, it always helps to show a bit of affection and will put a smile on her face for free. after all the most attractive curve on a women is a smile

      have aa nice day

Most Helpful Guys

  • Anonymous
    In the past, men behaving like "perfect gentlemen" essentially amounted to men treating women as if they were special, and that's because women were special back then. But women today are no longer special, in fact they have worked very hard over the last few decades to NOT be special. But interestingly, many of them still believe they deserve to be treated as special. When women start behaving like ladies again and respecting traditional female roles, then they can expect men to act start acting like gentlemen again and respecting those traditional male roles. Until then, nope.
    Disagree 3 People
    Is this still revelant?
    • good day anonymous.

      thank you for your input. don't you feel that you are stereotyping all women here i mean they are still special. Women are special for many reasons. i reposted something a read a year or so back in a my take if you want take a read trough it and see if you still feel the same.

      Something For The Ladies ↗

      you have the right to your opinion and we are allowed to differ so thank you for sharing

  • Hydra6544
    As long asI am still alive these traits will never die because this is how I was raised as a southern gentleman and that is what I will be until the day I die
    Like 1 Person
    Is this still revelant?
    • I love thant man. Thanks for your opinion

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What Girls & Guys Said

  • Toast792
    Yes. A lot of us still like gentlemen. So long as they aren't the kind of people that don't let us be independent ever. Just look at Tumblr for example, a great majority of the popular characters that the people on that site obsess over are classy, old-fashioned gentlemen. (I don't have a crush on the characters or anything it's just what i've seen)
    Like 1 Person
  • warrenstone
    If you want to get laid, get that “gentleman” bullshit out of your head
    LikeDisagree 2 People
    • lol thank you very much but I am happily married going on 8 years now. don't have a problem getting laid. I am currently studying human ethics and came across this subject, it is just something I agree with.

      i presume you do not do any of that

  • ABCD2341
    Women also do things for men
    Why are we not called chivalrous?
    Like 2 People
    • I must say that most women do more for men than they deserve. but nevertheless I agree we should start calling women chivalrous.

    • Because the word has mainly been used in the context of men being courteous to women.

      If I had to pair it to something it would how racism has mainly been used in the context for the minority.

      It doesn't mean that it it doesn't happen the other way around, it's just that most people recognize it the other way.

  • DWornock
    Women don't want a gentleman. They want a hot guy that acts like a gentleman.
  • Is that first picture a still from a porn film?
    Like 1 Person
    • It has to be some type of castng couch type of video.

  • Anonymous
    The man in the first picture is a real gentleman. She probably liked it so much that she let him fuck her on that couch there.
    Disagree 1 Person
    • It's funny how you hide behind anonymity while saying stuff you know is inappropriate.

    • Anonymous

      It's funny how you don't understand the joke, or that the picture/meme itself is a joke.

      That picture is from a porn casting scene.

    • Anonymous

      I don't know whether a perfect gentleman like yourself ever watches porn, but if you do, search for "casting couch".