Be Careful What You Text A Woman, She Will...

Be Careful What You Text A Woman, She Will...

This won’t be a very long take, just a GaG short lol. Just something I wanted to quickly share with a lot of guys out there from what I’ve learned out of my own experiences. As the title says, be careful what you text a female. And it doesn’t matter who it is. Whether it’s a female friend, someone you’re flirting with or interested in, even a family member. Be careful what you text them.

And why should you be careful?

Because they will show it to other people. Yes, you must beware of that. And it honestly doesn’t matter what nature you sent the message, they will still show it. I have been the guy on both sides of the spectrum, with both female friends and ones I’ve flirted with: I’ve been the guy who’s had his texts screenshot by a female and shared with others, and I’ve also been the guy who’s had female friends show me texts they got from other guys. And, yes, I have also been the one to show or read aloud to someone a text message I got from a female or someone else, but that is not common for me, and when I’ve done that it’s usually been because it was some kind of good news I got from the other person and wanted to share it with others. If it was a bad or weird text, I will just talk about it casually with someone but not really show them.

Be Careful What You Text A Woman, She Will...

Yes, I’m sure some guys do this as well, but women do this much, much more. I actually have rarely had any of my male buddies, co-workers, associations, or even my brother show me texts that they got from girls or anyone else. Occasionally a male buddy will show me screenshots of some debate he was having with someone else, but that’s really about it. Female friends of mine and exes, however, have shown me screenshots or shown me in person something that someone texted them many times. And as I said, it doesn’t matter in what nature you wrote it, if it is directly sexual, flirtatious, or even angry, emotional, etc. a female will still show that to her girlfriends, boyfriends, or beta simps that she keeps on hand just as a substitute girlfriend.

Be Careful What You Text A Woman, She Will...

So why do girls and women do this?

1. Simply because it’s their gossipy nature and they want to show people what you said especially if there are some juicy bits in your message.

2. Because they didn’t take you seriously on something you texted her, especially if you were emotional about it, so they thought it was funny and they want you to laugh at it too.

3. You said something very sexual, dirty, or flirtatious in your own way that she thought was “weird” or made her uncomfortable, so she shares it with others to privately humiliate you.

4. Something you said actually was very sweet and heartwarming to her and she felt like she wanted to show the world, but this is much rarer because women ever mostly want to show other people’s text messages to you if it puts the other person in a weird or negative light. Which is the biggest reason. Because it isn’t just other guys' messages they show to you or anyone else, but they will also show you messages they get from other females as well, especially if it’s some kind of drama or an argument.

Be Careful What You Text A Woman, She Will...

Sometimes a woman will show you someone’s texts claiming they don’t understand what they meant by such and such and want your advice/input - which sometimes they are being legit about - but in most cases they are not doing it for this reason, rather they’re trying to make you think ill, lesser, or weirded out by someone in their inbox so that the female can feel vindicated, validated, or like they have an ally (if it was a text argument), supported and comforted, and to humiliate the other person (if it was a “creepy” sexual text), or want you to eat popcorn with them (if it’s a gossipy message). They are basically looking for your agreement and support.

So, guys, that’s why I’m advising you to be careful about what you send a woman in DMs. They are still reading it even if they don’t respond. And they are often sharing it. So don’t let something you say become any kind of joke she can laugh at or a tool to use. Don’t say everything in DM, but wait to say some things to her in person. I do this a lot with certain details of a discussion I have with a woman. People need to remember that not everything is important to say in a text message, rather it is better to be said in person.

As I said, women are also showing you DMs they get from other women, but my focus here is on how you as a guy need to be hip and careful with what you text.

So from all of us here at the DHARMA Initiative, namaste, and good luck.

Be Careful What You Text A Woman, She Will...


Be Careful What You Text A Woman, She Will...
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24Girl Opinion
49Guy Opinion

Most Helpful Girl

  • readyplayer001
    I bet it happens more then some will admit. I have never shared any of my texts from anyone with anyone else ever. what is sent to me is for me only.
    Like 8 People
    Is this still revelant?
    • ManOnFire

      Very mature response.

    • Arivor

      Here is the important part… did you keep that text? In other words, can you pull it up anytime you want? See, that is what really got me in trouble… I had sent a text to this girl like years earlier, and she damn and went and showed it to my wife! I'm all like "but I didn't even know you back then baby!"

    • @Arivor that's messed up

Most Helpful Guy

  • Soleil8000
    Not only show it but entirely misconstrue it and, more then likely, whatever you write, will use it as an excuse to go fuck someone else.
    LikeDisagree 4 People
    Is this still revelant?
    • ManOnFire


    • Soleil8000

      Most women use making a date as an excuse to fuck someone as well - the feeling of sexual tension, which they use with another guy prior to a date to appear calm and not sexually too interested.
      Blame it on their mammas.

    • ManOnFire

      Wooooaaahhhh, I know exactly what you're talking about. I've noticed that too.

    • Show All

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What Girls & Guys Said

  • DizzyDesii
    Lmao. Be Careful What You Text A Woman, She Will...But at the same time, dudes is just as messy. In high school, college and even at my job, dudes be showing others “Ayy, look who let me hit” and they even be showing the girls nudes to the classmates and coworkers as a bragging right. So yes everyone does it and everyone needs to be made aware. But you just gotta be smart in what you put out there. Same goes for social media and crap
    Like 3 People
    • ManOnFire

      This is very true. Guys definitely share pics of girls they fucked - I've been shown a lot. I have pics I took of exes giving me head, naked, etc. but never shared those, they are 100% private for me and I still respect those women even if they don't respect me.

      I think the difference with that and chicks showing text messages is that the guys are just trying to have bragging rights. The girls are usually being devious and malevolent about showing people what's in their inbox.

    • DizzyDesii

      i mean its dumb to send nudes in the first place but they likely did that because they trust the guy. The fact some low lifes wanna show those pics around to both guy and girls in class and at work is jacked up forreal. I think thats worse then girls gossiping about what dude said in a text. I am surprised you didn't bring up receipts. A lot of people screenshot receipts so that when the girl/guy lies about something, they can easily said, nahh you said this on November the 1st at 2:20am my boy 😂

    • Girl preach! Men are the messiest of the messiest. They will show their friends text and call logs. Lie and say they had sex or was dating a woman that would never give them the time of day. They tell the entire barbershop. Biggest liars and cheaters on earth bit yet we are the bad guys

    • Show All
  • Vegasrunner
    This is excellent advice and a great take. I can't tell you how many times I have been sitting w/ a woman while she's showing me text and DM's from random dudes. We have a great laugh about it and it provides great insite into what guys are actually saying to these girls. My rule of thumb I never text a woman anything I'm not comfortable w/ her sgaring publically.
    Like 2 People
    • ManOnFire

      "My rule of thumb I never text a woman anything I'm not comfortable w/ her sgaring publically."
      - Precisely.

  • Uptowngirl88
    Huh? Men are the messiest of the messiest. They will show their friends text and call logs. Lie and say they had sex or was dating a woman that would never give them the time of day. They tell the entire barbershop. Biggest liars and cheaters on earth. They lie about their relationship status, dick size the amount of money they make just to get some ass. Nice try though
    LikeHelpfulDisagree 11 People
    • ManOnFire

      Guys do like to show nudes and brag about somebody they fucked. No doubt. But women tend to stir up storms of drama by showing people other people's texts or DMs, because if the person they showed them to opens their mouth, then the person who's message was shared/shown now knows that women went and spread it all around.

      I am not saying that guys are perfect or innocent. By any means. But there is a reason why a lot of women - and men - don't want to deal with other women and their drama.

    • t-8900

      You have pigs and you have gentleman. I've never showed anyone pics of exes or showed them my phone. I might summarize something to get advice for relationship and all. I'm not interested in sharing my sex life like that. It I did it'd be like years after I he fact and I wouldn't bring up names even nor all that we did. In fact I think it sets the tone and bar low for that individual male and I honestly don't think much of em after. It a person doesn't have basic human decency and some discipline I don't converse with them. If what you said happened to you I'm sorry and yes those guys would be low tier trash. Certainly not fit for a lady.

    • @agapehamna93 question is who hurt you? If it don't apply then let it fly. You must fit this description. Next time keep your fat mouth shut

    • Show All
  • Some_Goof
    Men do that to. And just like you generalized, I'm generaling too. I've had many male friends show me text a female sent them and so on. One of my guy friends screenshots everything just to have "evidence" lol.
    Like 3 People
    • ManOnFire

      But are they showing you just to be messy? Or because you're friends and they know they can trust you?

    • ManOnFire

      @Some_Goof So which one is it?

    • Some_Goof

      Most women show texts because they want help etc,
      Only immature 'people' mess around showing private convo to other people.

    • Show All
  • MzAsh
    You guys gotta learn the difference between a girl and a woman. I haven’t done this since I was 22.
    LikeDisagree 8 People
    • ManOnFire

      I word it that way on purpose. Because there are many 'women' out there who are still girls.

    • MzAsh


    • t-8900

      We seem to have an abinda of immaturity and arrogance going on these days. I've been r evaluating my dating life going into the future. I had been out of dating for 5-6 years. It's been a... sobering experience tbh. Lessons have been learned. At least that's a good starting point...

    • Show All
  • Bubbles45
    I do admit to the gossiping nature of text messages, especially from guys, or even better guys we have a particular interest in.

    Although I try my very best not to be snobby in that kind of way, you're absolutely right though, happens a lot in my highschool.
    Like 2 People
  • whirled_up_girl
    I wouldn’t do that! Besides why is someone else going to care about my texts when I don’t care about their texts?
    LikeHelpful 7 People
  • Diodoro
    This is mostly an age thing and an individual character thing. Girls definitely do it more at scale.

    I also personally know a lot of girls who share texts so that you know the circumstances, for when she asks you if she's overreacting, if she's wrong, or what you think she should do as a man looking at this.

    Because another females perspective often times won't help unless it's a girl currently living the relationship type she wants. Most female advice to their girlfriends is more or less "you're right. He's wrong. He shouldn't have done x. He should have done x. You should do X to make him change"

    Horrible advice 90% of the time. Will girls get what they want using that at times? Yes, at the cost of the happiness of their relationship and slowly eroding the integrity of it. Almost guaranteed failure long term.

    But yea, to your main point I agree you should consider what you text but not for that reason in my opinion. Mostly because being overly affected by the opinions of others is an innate human weakness we need to overcome.

    You should always attempt to do, say, act in way you can be proud of regardless of the outcome.
    • ManOnFire

      Even when females are sharing messages so that you know the circumstances, for when she asks you if she's overreacting, if she's wrong, or what you think she should do as a man looking at this, she's still hoping you tell her she's right. They're lying even to themselves by believing they want your advice. Even my female friends do the same thing. They're hoping you side with them.

    • Diodoro

      I've never had a girl come to me about something like this and not take it to heart when I said they're overreacting. That's not to take away from your point. I'm sure they do hope they're right.

      But this goes back around to my point this is mostly an age/character issue. Yes, some girls might get upset you don't agree and wish you sided with them.
      Many girls respect you for being honest and know they can come to you

      On the other side, girls may emotionally not feel great hearing they're overreacting and listen or at least be open to the idea and get a second opinion.

  • The_Maphio
    Main reason why I never send any texts if not to say where I am or how long it will take me to come back home, or where to meet up. If I have to say anything more important than that, I don't leave it written to be turned in testifiable gossip.
    The ability of lots of women to keep their traps shut is very, very flimsy.
    Like 1 Person
  • Nomoturtle
    I second this, multiple occurrences.

    Even for things that are really important, many women are incapable of keeping their mouths shut.
    Like 1 Person
    • ManOnFire

      My experience as well. And also in reverse, if there's something I actually DO want to go around I will casually tell it to a female because I know she'll open her mouth. This works a lot lol.

  • ObscuredBeyond
    And then there are Instagram trolls, who text you first and attack without warning. And make scurrilous accusations with zero concrete evidence. And defend their lack of justification with bizarre prejudices.

    If you don't fight back, they declare you're guilty. If you do, they're impervious to reason. You have to block them again and again, because they don't care about site rules against harassment. They love to get between you and your friends, and try to instigate maximum damage. Often, with no provocation that makes any sense to a rational human being. So then you're damned if you don't, and damned if you do.
    Like 1 Person
  • demonics
    You have no expectation of privacy with a woman. Not even your own mother. Hell back before text messaging girls would have their friends listen in on your conversation with her by calling you on 3-way. So whenever you see her friends giggling for seemingly no reason when you're around? Yea thats them mocking your flirts, emotional breakdowns, private medical issues, personal issues, you name it.
    Like 1 Person
  • TheSpaceGnome
    I can't stand gossipy women, they are always so boring and talk about nothing but what other people are doing.
    Like 1 Person
  • Texaskid1
    Which is why when dealing with a woman you never put stuff in writing.
    LikeHelpful 2 People
    • Texaskid1


      you don't know if what you text her could be used against you in a court of law.

      Be very , very careful indeed.

    • ManOnFire

      Indeed. Excellent point.

  • Assi2k
    I show texts to get advice about what to say back. Never for anything else. Or wait actually, also if something clever or funny was said by me or someone else😜
    LikeHelpful 3 People
  • jshm2
    Well... this is why all companies have Information policies.

    It's also why you should only ever share what you are willing to be shared onward. Never just assume privacy.
    Like 1 Person
  • CandaceSims201
    seen some women posting there reply by throuht the message to warn a women that i was a jerk. it deponds on me. i used to do but not has more. only done for reporting people online. yes, is was good mytake.
    Like 1 Person
  • Notfabricated11
    Thats facts but most of the time I could care less. One thing you realize is that those women that she showed those texts to will either tell you by body language or by telling other people. In which the info just gets right back to you. Just experienced that today and I just laughed. People are hilarious 🤣
    Like 1 Person
  • FilmGuy93
    My life experience has taught me that even though women show each other the messages, it's not really a problem. The bigger problem has more been that women will take what you give them and run wild with it. So you have to be careful what you text them because of how they over analyze your words and read meaning into things you didn't intend.

    There's really something weirdly charming about a fully grown woman doing it, but it's a little bit nerve-wracking. Her girlfriends are (usually) single for a reason.
    Like 1 Person
    • ManOnFire

      "So you have to be careful what you text them because of how they over analyze your words and read meaning into things you didn't intend."
      - Exceedingly true.

  • Idkanything55528
    1. Most women I know dont just randomly show texts to others. Most I know will ask other women/men for advice on what to reply back, sure.

    2. Wrong. We LOVE emotional men. We won't laugh at your for being emotional. If a person does that, its simply because they either aren't close to you or they aren't your friend.

    3. Why is it okay to send inapropriate texts/photos to women that either have never shown interest or have already said they werent interested, but not okay for them to laugh at you for doing so?

    4. Like I said with #1, we ask our friends for advice. Sometimes we dont know what to say. We dont want to say the wrong thing. Maybe we dont understand what was said.

    Firstly, it sounds like you guys are dating teenagers (mentally.) So maybe try older women. Because most of us aren't like that, and we dont do things for no reason. This isn't some scary movie full of teenagers.
    Like 5 People
    • yourheart3

      Just some questions about your 4th point.
      If you don't know what to say how does asking someone else do any good? The person asking you something wanted YOUR response. I'd rather take a weird response by you, the person I asked in the first place than an answer by someone else who isn't even part of the conversation.

      And if you don't understand something, why don't you ask the only person who can 100% tell you how it was meant? You know, the person that asked you in the first place.

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