A Few Things I Must Confess

Snsl153
A Few Things I Must Confess

This 'MyTake' is going to be different from most, it's going to be a confessional. Over the years I've made some really bad mistakes, did some really stupid things and, what's worse, from most of those mistakes I haven't really learnt a damn thing.

People in private messages here often say they really like me, that I have a winning personality and am this, that and everything else positive you can think of, but no, not really. I mean, I may seem that way on the surface, but I can be (and have been, countless times) a grumpy, mean, shallow and all-round rotten person.

I've said some pretty nasty things here in response to questions asked and comments made, have been intolerant of others when I didn't agree with them, have sworn like a drunken sailor (up to and including usage of the 'F-word'), have trolled, deceived, and sometimes even lied about certain things (like my age and location). I was caught a couple of times, but that didn't deter me, and I'm kind of shallow, self-centred and narcissistic. My profile picture, a picture of my ass, attracts hordes of thirsty, sex-starved males, and when they inevitably send me private messages, I only make things worse by deliberately teasing and sometimes even humiliating them.

Look, what you see online isn't real. It just isn't. That's not to say I have a fake account; I do not, I'm real, this is me, but anyone can promise the world and deliver zilch, zero, nought. Like me. What have I done really? Anything useful or constructive lately? Nope. I'm unemployed, unemployable, single and sad.

Don't become like me. Aim higher, be better. Don't fall into the trap of thinking you're a victim, do not do that ever.

Actually, this is the point at which I can make a clean break from the past. After all, now is as good a time as any moment in time, so I may as well, and my first act will be to change my profile photo to something more "wholesome". :)

Take care, lots of love <3 :*

A Few Things I Must Confess
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  • Anonymous
    First of all... Great self diagnosis so my compliments on that! Thrully looking at your actions and deeds and especially the things you haven't done right is defining who you are a person. Not a whole lot of people can do this sadly and instead of looking at their own mistakes, they will only blame others for theirs.
    So it's thrully worth complimenting you on that aspect.

    Now it's time to change those mistakes to be able to become a better version of yourself and someone who makes the world a better place just by looking at your own actions and correcting them. Don't blame yourself to long because you did not understand back what you know now so it's forgiven!

    Just don't keep making the same mistakes again and again because then it isn't forgiveble anymore because then you are knowingly and willingly hurting others with is unacceptable.

    But I doubt you will do that and I have little doubts you gonna make those mistakes again.

    Be proud of what you accomplished because I trully admire you for it 🙏😇😇
    Like 2 People
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Most Helpful Girl

  • Blackcosmo
    That's really admirable of you to share your experience. But it's normal for everyone to steam off a little and some of the things you did weren't quite as bad as you think. I'm new so I haven't really seen much of your comments but I just want you to know a shallow, self-centered, and narcissistic person wouldn't be sharing this. You have the ability to realize your mistakes and admit them and not many people can do that. Don't be so hard on yourself and I hope you're feeling better.
    Like 2 People
    Is this still revelant?
    • Thanks for the MHO!

    • Shamalien

      She certainly was that way. Now that she has confessed and shown a desire to grow past that, though, she can become anyone she wants to be

    • @Shamalien Absolutely

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What Girls & Guys Said

317
  • The_Shadow_Dweller
    Having talked with you in Direct Messages, I knew that you were a really good person. You replied constantly and that too in familiar type and that was a big thing.

    But since you seemed so nice in the chats and overall, I figured that you must also be having the dark side. Everybody does. But those people who seem too nice, their dark side is also that harsh and concentrated. It is not mixed with the nicer side that much as compared to other people.

    Everybody wants to show their nicer side as it is more appeasing to people. But for me, the nicer the person is, the more wary I am of them. Does not get applied online as we are seldom talking at the same time. And people usually restrict themselves from writing something offensive. Extreme people are also there. Ignore them.

    In the real life, I need to be careful of such people. The worst are those who do not show their dark side at all. Stay away from them.

    It is natural what you wrote. You feel regret, anger towards yourself. This proves that you are inherently a good person, but slip of tongue happens more often than can be counted.

    I admire you for what you wrote. Respect level for you +100.

    Acknowledging your problems is the first step towards solving them. You said that you are not employed and are not employable. Good that you know that you yourself are unemployable, rather than complaining about not getting a job. People do that.

    Now work on that problem.

    Find online classes, courses etc. Udemy is one good medium to get good authentic, practical knowledge. Now the companies are also acknowledging Udemy certificates.

    As an engineering student, I am currently unemployable. But I am working on it by increasing my skills in programming. You can try your hand at coding too. If you feel like it.

    Finally, I would have liked a sister like you, but I, unfortunately don't have any. Like no sister at all.
    Helpful 1 Person
    • Snsl153

      I don't know if I'd be right for coding; I'm not a technically-minded person. I've mainly done administration/data entry work, for which technical qualifications are zero.

  • exitseven
    Good MyTake. A site like this can act as a catharsis. You have things that you are trying to change about yourself and you are confronting these things on this site. I think you have found some self discovery and can actually fix some things about you that you do not like.
    I imagine it took a little bit of courage to write this.
    Like 2 People
    • Snsl153

      Surprisingly enough, it's been something that I've wanted to do for quite some time, because I absolutely hate keeping secrets. A 'MyTake' was the perfect way to do it, I'm glad GAG has them. And yes, it's very cathartic.

    • exitseven

      @snsl153 cool

  • Th3ft
    Well my dear I don’t think ANYONE will ever fault you for enjoying teasing the hordes of sex crazy goons on here nor would anyone blame you for losing your temper from time to time. From what I am hearing you are a real woman who has been through a change in her life and is realizing how much her life used to be a life of self loving and pride when she never really realized it as such. And that is also totally normal! If we are being honest we have all gone through something similar or will some day. The only thing that you need to be careful about from here is to not get down on yourself for things said or done in the past. You are who you are because of who you were and now you can be who you want to be. So let that life go and enjoy this new one! It sounds like you already have but I just want to encourage you in that! Lol! You seem like a totally sweet person who would be a LOT of fun to get to know in real life and maybe you are in a rut but you will move on and be better and stronger from here! And I have a feeling that you are gonna like what you do way more when you get in to that next chapter!
    Like 1 Person
    • Th3ft

      Also… I just looked at your updated profile pic… your ass was an amazing profile pic. 😜 but this is a much better one! 😊 good choice! I hope you do espy your next chapter!!

  • laurieluvsit
    There is also a balance Ms @snsl153 where you can still allow yourself to have fun.

    Always be yourself, but be the best version of yourself you can be at the time.

    We all make mistakes and wish we hadn't pushed the 'submit' button from time to time whether it be online or in person. Don't beat yourself up over it.

    All my interactions with you that I can remember have been great.

    "The unseemly interactions of those we love we write upon the sands of forgetfulness, but their virtues we save forever written on the walls of eternity" ~Laurie Hunter
    Like 1 Person
  • KostasKouvalis
    I honestly don't give a fuck. No one's perfect and it's not like I haven't exhibited some of those qualities, or done things I'm not proud of. And I don't really learn from my mistakes either.

    On the other hand, I've never had the apparent misfortune of being on the receiving end of your "devilish side". Then again, by the time I met you, you made your boundaries pretty clear on your profile, so I decided to not risk crossing them.

    The only thing I will be critical of is, you post a picture of your ass then write that any guy who tries to sext will be blocked. So the only behavior I don't agree with is the rude teasing and humiliation. I've had that happened to me, and it's not fun.

    The unemployed and single I'm more surprised. I did think you sounded a bit narcissistic, but that's okay. I did notice a lot of what you wrote was contradictory and counterintuitive, and I did sense a bit of dishonest and condescending vibe from you, which is probably why I never tried to get to know you more. That, and you basically said you'll only tell us what you want to tell us.

    I really did want to get to know you before, since we agree on a lot of things, but like I said, I didn't want to be on the recieving end of the behaviors you posted about. If I was, I probably would give a shit. And the only people I've seen you be condescending towards, were the same ones I was. Actually, that's how I met you😂

    Anyways, just be yourself. I'm one of those people who's capable of seeing through the bullshit, to the good in someone, unless they're really screwed up, which you don't seem to be.
    • I'll never understand religious people who are this way though, but a lot them are

    • she's my girl leave her alone loser

    • @thethug1234 She's no ones girl. I'll talk to whoever I want. She followed me, and I've never disrespected her in any way, so piss off

    • Show All
  • ohsheeT
    But you took the time to be honest with yourself you put it in words that we all felt you have just done with so many people can't do and that is to be honest with yourself this is a growing moment in your life and you shared it all with us so I thank you for who you are I thank you for being bold I thank you for being honest and I thank you for being real
  • JessicaEarl
    Really great introspection. The internet needs less toxicity, and it’s amazing to see a big contributed realize it. I applaud you
    Like 1 Person
  • BCRanger10
    I appreciate your honesty. Thank you for sharing this. I hope things get better for you here 🙌
    Like 2 People
  • SkyCastle90
    You're not alone. Feeling empty, alone, flawed, etc only last as long as you allow it. You're rising above it now, but don't beat yourself to a pulp mentally/emotionally (or physically, I don't know what you got going on) when you stumble during your journey. You're going to make more mistakes, you'll even temporarily fall back into bad habits, but what can separate you from your old self is standing back up and trying again to do better.

    There are plenty of things you can do to aid you during your change, but as a starter a good book to read would be: I Want to Change, But Don't Know How
    Helpful 1 Person
  • NathanDavis
    didn't even notice any of those things... hope you're feeling better though
    Like 1 Person
  • D4nielv
    I admire everything about this post, good job! Proud of you 🙌
    Like 1 Person
  • Guy13
    WE are fallen and by definition imperfect. Hopefully, you will find yourself imperfectly perfect In Christ Jesus.
  • globetrotter22
    I am glad you are owning up to what you have done. Most people don’t have the stones to do this.
    Like 2 People
    • Just a FYI if you were truly a sociopathic (and some women and men are) you wouldn’t be intro perspective.

      However just remember there are real life consequences when you harm people. Men might act stoic but that doesn’t mean you aren’t hurting them. Think twice before you do some of things you talked to above again.

  • RealMarek
    Being honest with yourself this way will greatly help you find your path. I wish you the best.
    Like 1 Person
  • 888theGreat
    Ok , you are really where? Age? You borrowed someone elses Ass? You are really Conservative? In US or out of US? Why are you unemployable? Criminal record? I am letting you make things right by answering these questions.
    • Snsl153

      I don't think I've ever categorised myself as being "a conservative". Many of the values I have could be classed as such, but even so, I'm not the type of person to take sides just because it's what's expected of me; I'm not in any way tribal.
      I (strongly) oppose the ideological indoctrination of children, abortions on demand, political correctness in all its forms, censorship of any kind, "mandates", and any and all other infringements of our basic rights (like personal space and privacy).
      However, I also support gun control, a free and universal health care system, and oppose the death penalty.
      Now before anyone says, "But the right to bear arms - that's a right, it says so in our constitution", I'm Australian, not American, and I've never recognised the accumulation of a private arsenal to be anyone's "right".
      And no, I don't have a criminal record. It's complicated.

    • So you know , Universal Healthcare will be abused and you will have to wait 6 months to treat cancer. Not to mention National Debt will be way over 100 Trillion because doctors will give every test know to man running up the tabs.

    • Snsl153

      Um... did you see the part where I said I'm Australian?
      Do you know how long I have to wait to see a doctor in our free, and perfectly fine, system? One week, at most. Quite often it's the very next day.

    • Show All
  • Kiss_Me
    Congratulations. You have successfully taken a few more steps down the maturity path.
    Woo Hoo!!
  • nawtee_me
    You are forgiven...
    Like 1 Person
  • Jamie05rhs
    Good MyTake. Thanks for sharing.
  • Jamesshinobi
    you sound like so. eone i used to know.
  • Jouth
    I don't care about your confessions
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