do you realize that 200 years ago when society was extremely patriarchal, young women and girls had no choice on who to marry? brides were bought and sold in many cultures. Rich old men even had multiple wives. Its not like in our modern society where a female can pick who to marry. 200 years ago, girls were forced to marry men who had the money to buy her from her parents. Its something called dowry.
There is no "allure" of dating older men reality is women and men are valued for different things. A womens value is in her youth and beauty while a mans value is in his resources which typically takes time to acquire. in my opinion their are two main reasons it's frowned upon.
1. Women dont like being reminded of how short their window actually is so when they see 40, 50 year old man w/ a women 20 years his junior it reminds them that they can't do that and women only like double standards that benifit them.
2. Most guys dont get women of any kind so when they see an older guy pulling a young women it makes them feel like a loser because they're struggling to get women their own age. They would rather believe the man "manipulated" the girl vs work on improving themselves so they cam attract similar women.
The sex instinct exists for procreation. Men who sexually desired women who can’t procreate didn’t pass along their DNA. While sex with a 50-year-old isn’t morally repulsive like sex with a prepubescent girl, neither is desirable to most men and for the same reason.
Women are most fertile at around 18, and therefore are the most desirable.
Dating younger women is frowned upon by older women since they don’t like the competition. Asking a man with a younger girlfriend “Couldn’t you find a woman your own age?” is a lot like asking a man with a Bentley Continental if he could have bought a Chevy Spark.
Not the lifestyle for me. I want someone that I can relate to and that won't die 30 years before I do so I'm much happier with someone my age. My husband is a little younger then me but not much. If I was still in the dating game I'd want someone my age or younger. Never older.
If other women want to date older then that's cool and all but just kind of screams daddy issues (no offense)
Every woman had daddy issues. One could say that a woman who prefers younger men (which is not the norm for females) is purposely trying to distance her lover from her father. Either she doesn't want to be reminded of her father and purposely wants a non father like dynamic or she wants her father daughter relationship special and nothing to be like it since she only has true feelings for her daddy.
Fyi what i said was bullshit. But "daddy issues" generally are all bullshit because all behavior can be seen through the lense of the daddy. No dad in the picture... daddy issues. Daddy very involved and daughter a daddys girl... daddy issues. Daddy rapes and beats her... daddy issues. Literally what can a dad do to not have a daughter with daddy issues? Lmao. Girl just likes older men, daddy issues. Girl likes younger men, daddy issues. Girl is a slut... daddy issues. Girl is a virgin til 30. Daddy issues. Get my point?
@shaysh87 doesn't sound fun at all. Also think about the difference in sex drives. A woman's in her 40s is still gonna want to be pretty active while a 60 year old man is gonna have to be popping blue pills just to get going.
Just another example of how much more common it is for younger women to date older men. A lot of women dont like it because it reminds them of how short their timeframe of being valuable to society is.
There is so much in your story that touches on massive social problems, like the empowerment of abusive women in family courts, corruption in law enforcement, and the propensity of child services to take difficult situations and make them worse.
Suffice it to say, given all you have been through, I am happy you have found a healthy relationship.
I am one of those older guys who has dated younger woman. It’s really up to the woman to determine if the relationship to progress whether is giving out a number and all the way up to marriage.
So if a (legally) younger woman likes an older man it’s on her to proceed or not. Yes he does need to show he’s interested. But most older guys know they are in no position to “pursue” much younger women without risking the creep label (which only gets riskier the larger the age gap).
Personally what I've come to realize is that most if not all younger women who date or prefer older men either have or had serious dad/father issues. And are usually estranged from their fathers.
They want the love, attention and security of older men that they never got from their own fathers.
I don't care if they do it I just find it quite sad.
Not sure why the religious crowd frowns upon it, historically they didn't. Women are on average much more socially adept than men, they mature faster. When the boys are playing cops & robbers what's the girls doing? They're playing with their dolls, having fantasy relationships etc.. I'll be 42 this month, I attract plenty of younger women, personally not that into them, they seem confused about what they're after & I'm not the kind of man that jumps through hoops for ANY woman.
Obviously it’s a security thing for you if I’m reading it right financially emotionally sexually Social status plays a factor Age wise, men tend to not be taken seriously till they have reached a higher level of credibility than women. That takes time to accomplish hence when women are looking for a partner older men are more appealing. I could go on but that’s just a snapshot of my opinion
You are way wrong about it being frowned upon by the religious crowd. Look at that church leader in Arizona who married multiple teenagers in his 60's. OK, that is an extreme example but I definitely have seen the tendency for such people to go MORE for that kind of relationship.
Older men are more mature , more stable , they have been some shit in life. The younger guys in their 20's are still green. Women are attracted to this.
A younger women is more fertile and healthier than an older women. Many older guys will be attracted to this.
*WOW* Firstly, thank you for your courage to speak up! I have followed you for a longtime, since before your kids, and I had no idea things were so rough for you growing up! I'm glad to see you have not let your past keep you down, and that you have grown from your experiences to become a mother better than your own. Congratulations! You should be proud of yourself and thank you for sharing. Others can learn from you.
Christians married girls as young as three back in those times. It was very common across the ancient world since marriage was rarely about love re your some religions comment. History is our friend and all. This secured a future for the girl, stopped was, secured kingdoms, etc.
Re nowadays who cares. There are plenty of people for everyone. People are much too concerned with other people's business.
An excellent summary, well done. Tends to explain why I don’t have problems dating young girls 18 and older. Have even had some 15-17 year old girls wanting to go out with me, but told them to wait until they were 18.
so did you have to Train him to be a good lover? and i am sure you manage all the Mature Adult stuff as he is so young.
That is one thing i love most about older men. They take charge and i have to rarely make decisions. I am happy.. Been with my husband over 4 years now.
Well we have only been together a few weeks. It’s relatively new! Honestly we jumped into the bed way to quick after the first date 😬 we got a hotel room that night the first session was just ok the second was really, really good. We’ve been really sexually compatible and have great communication in the bedroom. I tell him what position I want it for the most part if that’s what you mean by controlling. But we’ve been getting in. a lot of practice to make up for inexperience lol it’s actually really good!! This is only the second guy I’ve ever been with the first was my hubby who was my high school sweetheart. He passed away a few years ago and this was my first since then. We’re s pretty chill as far as the relationship decisions yea I guess I make a lot of the time not nearly all of them but we’re both pretty laid back about those type things
people can't stand the fact that at some point in the past, he would have been legally too old to have sex with her. that's it. there's no logical or emotional reason to demean relationships with different age groups.
Teen girls and young women have been conditioned by man-made sexist society to date and marry old men for centuries. It’s a tradition that’s never going away
Are you that uneducated you don’t know men made society the way it is today? Women literally had no rights. . Gender roles, the way things are, issues, the good, bad of society, etc
78% of household discretionary spending - controlled by women
Most suicides - men Most workplace deaths - men most military deaths - men higher unemployment - men lower college graduation rate - men legal discrimination against in jobs and education (affirmative action) - men most homelessness - men no rights to your aborted fetus - men most incarcerated persons - men most murder victims - men
I don't know that "mystery" is the right way to put the attraction older men have for younger women. There isn't an element of intrigue; it's about energy. Younger women are more energetic.
I would never date an older man but if my libido was high and I was drunk then I would let an old one bonk me,( as long as nobody found out about it ). I hit the gym 5X per week and have been doing do for years and it shows but I kinda get off on it when some gross old fat dude hides the sausage in me. I don't why but guys like that bring out the submissive part of me, yeah I know it's pretty pervy. Whereas young good looking fit guys around my age I want to dominate.
Because Women wait on the finish line for the winner. Younger women want older guys because they're financially stable, just female nature at it's finest. I really don't understand why you are acting so clueless and wrote down a bunch of womanese that no one gives a shit about anyway even tho you already know the answer smh.
Home > Girl's Behavior > myTakes > What is the Allure & Mystery of younger women dating older men? Why is it frowned upon by so many people, especially the Religious crowd?
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do you realize that 200 years ago when society was extremely patriarchal, young women and girls had no choice on who to marry? brides were bought and sold in many cultures. Rich old men even had multiple wives. Its not like in our modern society where a female can pick who to marry. 200 years ago, girls were forced to marry men who had the money to buy her from her parents. Its something called dowry.
There is no "allure" of dating older men reality is women and men are valued for different things. A womens value is in her youth and beauty while a mans value is in his resources which typically takes time to acquire. in my opinion their are two main reasons it's frowned upon.
1. Women dont like being reminded of how short their window actually is so when they see 40, 50 year old man w/ a women 20 years his junior it reminds them that they can't do that and women only like double standards that benifit them.
2. Most guys dont get women of any kind so when they see an older guy pulling a young women it makes them feel like a loser because they're struggling to get women their own age. They would rather believe the man "manipulated" the girl vs work on improving themselves so they cam attract similar women.
The sex instinct exists for procreation. Men who sexually desired women who can’t procreate didn’t pass along their DNA. While sex with a 50-year-old isn’t morally repulsive like sex with a prepubescent girl, neither is desirable to most men and for the same reason.
Women are most fertile at around 18, and therefore are the most desirable.
Dating younger women is frowned upon by older women since they don’t like the competition. Asking a man with a younger girlfriend “Couldn’t you find a woman your own age?” is a lot like asking a man with a Bentley Continental if he could have bought a Chevy Spark.
Not the lifestyle for me. I want someone that I can relate to and that won't die 30 years before I do so I'm much happier with someone my age. My husband is a little younger then me but not much. If I was still in the dating game I'd want someone my age or younger. Never older.
If other women want to date older then that's cool and all but just kind of screams daddy issues (no offense)
Thats true. By the time she is in her 40s, she will find herself being married to a grandpa. how fun will that be?
Every woman had daddy issues. One could say that a woman who prefers younger men (which is not the norm for females) is purposely trying to distance her lover from her father. Either she doesn't want to be reminded of her father and purposely wants a non father like dynamic or she wants her father daughter relationship special and nothing to be like it since she only has true feelings for her daddy.
Fyi what i said was bullshit. But "daddy issues" generally are all bullshit because all behavior can be seen through the lense of the daddy. No dad in the picture... daddy issues. Daddy very involved and daughter a daddys girl... daddy issues. Daddy rapes and beats her... daddy issues. Literally what can a dad do to not have a daughter with daddy issues? Lmao. Girl just likes older men, daddy issues. Girl likes younger men, daddy issues. Girl is a slut... daddy issues. Girl is a virgin til 30. Daddy issues. Get my point?
@shaysh87 doesn't sound fun at all. Also think about the difference in sex drives. A woman's in her 40s is still gonna want to be pretty active while a 60 year old man is gonna have to be popping blue pills just to get going.
@bamesjond0069
I've always liked older boys but never mcdaddies or grandpas. Sorry I don't have daddy issues.
@bamesjond0069 I don't have daddy issues. My dad was there and supportive of me my whole life
I mean thats just as much daddy issues as any other i posted. Thus why i said its generally just all bullshit.
Just another example of how much more common it is for younger women to date older men. A lot of women dont like it because it reminds them of how short their timeframe of being valuable to society is.
There is so much in your story that touches on massive social problems, like the empowerment of abusive women in family courts, corruption in law enforcement, and the propensity of child services to take difficult situations and make them worse.
Suffice it to say, given all you have been through, I am happy you have found a healthy relationship.
I am one of those older guys who has dated younger woman. It’s really up to the woman to determine if the relationship to progress whether is giving out a number and all the way up to marriage.
So if a (legally) younger woman likes an older man it’s on her to proceed or not. Yes he does need to show he’s interested. But most older guys know they are in no position to “pursue” much younger women without risking the creep label (which only gets riskier the larger the age gap).
Personally what I've come to realize is that most if not all younger women who date or prefer older men either have or had serious dad/father issues. And are usually estranged from their fathers.
They want the love, attention and security of older men that they never got from their own fathers.
I don't care if they do it I just find it quite sad.
Not sure why the religious crowd frowns upon it, historically they didn't. Women are on average much more socially adept than men, they mature faster. When the boys are playing cops & robbers what's the girls doing? They're playing with their dolls, having fantasy relationships etc.. I'll be 42 this month, I attract plenty of younger women, personally not that into them, they seem confused about what they're after & I'm not the kind of man that jumps through hoops for ANY woman.
Obviously it’s a security thing for you if I’m reading it right financially emotionally sexually Social status plays a factor
Age wise, men tend to not be taken seriously till they have reached a higher level of credibility than women. That takes time to accomplish hence when women are looking for a partner older men are more appealing.
I could go on but that’s just a snapshot of my opinion
You are way wrong about it being frowned upon by the religious crowd. Look at that church leader in Arizona who married multiple teenagers in his 60's. OK, that is an extreme example but I definitely have seen the tendency for such people to go MORE for that kind of relationship.
I would agree, it's not uncommon in LDS.
Older men are more mature , more stable , they have been some shit in life. The younger guys in their 20's are still green. Women are attracted to this.
A younger women is more fertile and healthier than an older women. Many older guys will be attracted to this.
*WOW* Firstly, thank you for your courage to speak up! I have followed you for a longtime, since before your kids, and I had no idea things were so rough for you growing up! I'm glad to see you have not let your past keep you down, and that you have grown from your experiences to become a mother better than your own. Congratulations! You should be proud of yourself and thank you for sharing. Others can learn from you.
Christians married girls as young as three back in those times. It was very common across the ancient world since marriage was rarely about love re your some religions comment. History is our friend and all. This secured a future for the girl, stopped was, secured kingdoms, etc.
Re nowadays who cares. There are plenty of people for everyone. People are much too concerned with other people's business.
An excellent summary, well done. Tends to explain why I don’t have problems dating young girls 18 and older. Have even had some 15-17 year old girls wanting to go out with me, but told them to wait until they were 18.
good writing, good substance!
I’m 40 and dating a 21 year old so I’m the wrong person to ask
so did you have to Train him to be a good lover? and i am sure you manage all the Mature Adult stuff as he is so young.
That is one thing i love most about older men. They take charge and i have to rarely make decisions. I am happy.. Been with my husband over 4 years now.
Well we have only been together a few weeks. It’s relatively new! Honestly we jumped into the bed way to quick after the first date 😬 we got a hotel room that night the first session was just ok the second was really, really good. We’ve been really sexually compatible and have great communication in the bedroom. I tell him what position I want it for the most part if that’s what you mean by controlling. But we’ve been getting in. a lot of practice to make up for inexperience lol it’s actually really good!! This is only the second guy I’ve ever been with the first was my hubby who was my high school sweetheart. He passed away a few years ago and this was my first since then. We’re s pretty chill as far as the relationship decisions yea I guess I make a lot of the time not nearly all of them but we’re both pretty laid back about those type things
people can't stand the fact that at some point in the past, he would have been legally too old to have sex with her. that's it. there's no logical or emotional reason to demean relationships with different age groups.
Teen girls and young women have been conditioned by man-made sexist society to date and marry old men for centuries. It’s a tradition that’s never going away
"man-made sexist society " - yeah whatever, put the kool aid down
Are you that uneducated you don’t know men made society the way it is today? Women literally had no rights. . Gender roles, the way things are, issues, the good, bad of society, etc
78% of household discretionary spending - controlled by women
Most suicides - men
Most workplace deaths - men
most military deaths - men
higher unemployment - men
lower college graduation rate - men
legal discrimination against in jobs and education (affirmative action) - men
most homelessness - men
no rights to your aborted fetus - men
most incarcerated persons - men
most murder victims - men
@notwoke And your statistics are what? Supposed to be 100% factual? Statistics are never 100% factual
Yeah I wonder why since they have male privilege
They choose that work
Men forced men to go to war. Women actually fought to join which took a while
Women are hardworking
They don’t graduate
Lies. Men sexual assault women and get away with it even in job
What?
Ok?
What rights should he have? I’m sure if it was possible, After it’s born at 3 weeks, he could have it
Men commit the most crimes. Police take them to jail
Yeah by other MEN not women
I don't know that "mystery" is the right way to put the attraction older men have for younger women. There isn't an element of intrigue; it's about energy. Younger women are more energetic.
I would never date an older man but if my libido was high and I was drunk then I would let an old one bonk me,( as long as nobody found out about it ). I hit the gym 5X per week and have been doing do for years and it shows but I kinda get off on it when some gross old fat dude hides the sausage in me. I don't why but guys like that bring out the submissive part of me, yeah I know it's pretty pervy. Whereas young good looking fit guys around my age I want to dominate.
Because Women wait on the finish line for the winner. Younger women want older guys because they're financially stable, just female nature at it's finest. I really don't understand why you are acting so clueless and wrote down a bunch of womanese that no one gives a shit about anyway even tho you already know the answer smh.