For me, no. I think it depends on a lot of stuff including how you were treated as a kid and how you see yourself. I don't have the ability to properly read into a situation well. Hell, if my boyfriend hasn't told me he's been flirting with me since he met me I would've thought he was just a really good friend of mine.
i think it depends on woman personality. If she's a kind of self centered person, then she will attract with man who doesn't give her attention she want. But if she just simply love a small gesture from the man she's been attracted with, so what's the point to play hard-to-get stuff.
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Anonymous
(25-29)
+1 y
I am really insecure and have no confidence in myself when it comes to dating. That's a reason why I tend to fall for guys not interested in me, because in my head those who are interested have no choice other than liking me. I know this is wrong but whenever I find out my "crush" have interest in me too I stop liking him. I only fall for guys who's not interested in me at all.
Fear of intimacy and abandonment is common. Leads to people craving their crush but once they get their attention, anxiety rises, childhood fears awaken and you stop liking them out of a defensive mechanism. Once the crush starts liking someone else, the rejecter tends to start liking them again and repeats cycle.
I always thought this was a bit of an urban myth - I don't like games and usually like girls who don't like games so to get involved in a scenario like this seems counter productive to me.
This question feels like one of those mythical โgirl logicโ situations where itโs drummed into us that it exists because TV and movies have told us itโs true, like girls having pillow fights in their underwear.
no, that is not appealing to me at all. I am not going to chase after anyone nor wait around to see if they like me. Interested? Say so. Not interested? okay, that's cool too. we will still be cool.
Not for me personally. If a guy is interested in me and I find him attractive, I am interested back. But some women do like the challenge of a taken man who is in a happy relationship.
@whosupforfun2 I'm dating not engaged, and have dated before my boyfriend so I have experience lol. Me being taken doesn't negate my experiences and my ability to exercise my opinion.
Well, for me the guy would have to chase first, or else I would have no idea if he is interested or not. A little chasing by the girl is fine, but for me the man would have to act first, then act disinterested if he wants a chase. 🙂
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Anonymous
(36-45)
+1 y
Not true, people are comfortable around their own kind, so maybe she is a game player too. I lose interest in people who don't show interest, unless I think he's missing out and really worth it. Then I will try to tear his wall down.
Not disinterested, but not TOO interested. Desperation is a major turn-off and suggests there might be something wrong, but if he's not showing interest I assume he just is not interested and will not chase him.
What would be no interest? Like completely ignoring? I've used, and currently am, the ignore technique to varied results. Of course, it includes saying hi/bye, a comment here and there, helping them when needed, conversation from time to time- Though never interest in her life unless she brings it up
@pullup77 Yeah, ignoring would definitely be "no interest." Basically, showing interest to me is actively trying to make conversation and being a little flirtatious. Too much interest would be calling or texting all the time, calling me his girlfriend after only a few dates, too much pda, any stalker-ish behavior... basically taking things too fast and behaving in a way that indicates desperation or insecurity.
Well if he acts disinterested, I assume he's not interested so I don't put much energy on that.
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Anonymous
(30-35)
+1 y
It is the sad, sick, ugly truth bro. They just seem so interested in those people who treat them like shit and don't care about them much. But let me tell you, these are most of the time pretty girls. Because I think that pretty girls just get so much attention and are fed up of it, and then they start to feel good when they hardly get attention from some people and those are the people they are interested in.
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For me, no. I think it depends on a lot of stuff including how you were treated as a kid and how you see yourself. I don't have the ability to properly read into a situation well. Hell, if my boyfriend hasn't told me he's been flirting with me since he met me I would've thought he was just a really good friend of mine.
i think it depends on woman personality. If she's a kind of self centered person, then she will attract with man who doesn't give her attention she want. But if she just simply love a small gesture from the man she's been attracted with, so what's the point to play hard-to-get stuff.
I am really insecure and have no confidence in myself when it comes to dating. That's a reason why I tend to fall for guys not interested in me, because in my head those who are interested have no choice other than liking me. I know this is wrong but whenever I find out my "crush" have interest in me too I stop liking him. I only fall for guys who's not interested in me at all.
wow no wonder we live in such a screwed up world filled with misogynist mgtows. insecure people bring real harm in society.
I've been there. It's a horrible feeling. You'll outgrow it though.
this is really different! i have never encountered anyone like you before! by the way i am not interested in you lol ๐๐
This makes absolutely no sense
Fear of intimacy and abandonment is common. Leads to people craving their crush but once they get their attention, anxiety rises, childhood fears awaken and you stop liking them out of a defensive mechanism. Once the crush starts liking someone else, the rejecter tends to start liking them again and repeats cycle.
I always thought this was a bit of an urban myth - I don't like games and usually like girls who don't like games so to get involved in a scenario like this seems counter productive to me.
This question feels like one of those mythical โgirl logicโ situations where itโs drummed into us that it exists because TV and movies have told us itโs true, like girls having pillow fights in their underwear.
no, that is not appealing to me at all. I am not going to chase after anyone nor wait around to see if they like me. Interested? Say so. Not interested? okay, that's cool too. we will still be cool.
ummmm not for me whatsoever.
i like guys who like me back, and if they show specific disinterest, i won't bother them and i'll lose the attraction towards them
I'm with the OP.
I wouldn't say all women are like that. But yes, I've noticed a few that seem more interested in me when I show little or no interest in them.
Not for me personally. If a guy is interested in me and I find him attractive, I am interested back. But some women do like the challenge of a taken man who is in a happy relationship.
I prefer when a guy puts the effort in it makes me excited 😘
No if they act disinterested in me I'll try and move on. Don't see a point in wasting time. If a guy acts interested in me then I'll work on it.
Nah, I've dealt with that too many times. I've talked to guys like that and then I had crushes and then rejected. I can't lol.
Nah. If a guy doesn't show interest I assume he doesn't like me.
Noo, if I get the idea that the guy is not interested in me why should I waste my time?
I'm the opposite. The second a guy shows disinterest, I lose interest.
you are engaged so this question was not for you
@whosupforfun2 I'm dating not engaged, and have dated before my boyfriend so I have experience lol. Me being taken doesn't negate my experiences and my ability to exercise my opinion.
what kind of work do u do here
Well, for me the guy would have to chase first, or else I would have no idea if he is interested or not. A little chasing by the girl is fine, but for me the man would have to act first, then act disinterested if he wants a chase. 🙂
Not true, people are comfortable around their own kind, so maybe she is a game player too. I lose interest in people who don't show interest, unless I think he's missing out and really worth it. Then I will try to tear his wall down.
Not disinterested, but not TOO interested. Desperation is a major turn-off and suggests there might be something wrong, but if he's not showing interest I assume he just is not interested and will not chase him.
See my new Take I told you about?
Which one? "Guys, Keep Doing Your Thing"?
What would be no interest? Like completely ignoring? I've used, and currently am, the ignore technique to varied results. Of course, it includes saying hi/bye, a comment here and there, helping them when needed, conversation from time to time- Though never interest in her life unless she brings it up
@pullup77 Yeah, ignoring would definitely be "no interest." Basically, showing interest to me is actively trying to make conversation and being a little flirtatious. Too much interest would be calling or texting all the time, calling me his girlfriend after only a few dates, too much pda, any stalker-ish behavior... basically taking things too fast and behaving in a way that indicates desperation or insecurity.
I agree pancakes. Interest too soon is like, you don't even know me yet. But no interest ever is as much of a turn off
Well if he acts disinterested, I assume he's not interested so I don't put much energy on that.
It is the sad, sick, ugly truth bro. They just seem so interested in those people who treat them like shit and don't care about them much.
But let me tell you, these are most of the time pretty girls. Because I think that pretty girls just get so much attention and are fed up of it, and then they start to feel good when they hardly get attention from some people and those are the people they are interested in.