My girlfriend feels like she doesn’t deserve me, but it upsets me because I love her so much (pic in details) I just need opinions on the matter?

[Anonymous]

She’s really bold when she’s upset and my last message I sent was from the bottom of my heart and I just don’t feel like that’s fair for me when she gives me nothing back, should I just distance myself for a little bit for her to think about this? She has suffered from anxiety and depression in her life before I came so this could also be a factor, I don’t really know 🤷🏼‍♂️ Opinions would be great at this time because I don’t know what to do

[Crapulux]

It's a shit test, more specifically a comfort test. File it under the same category as "I'm not pretty" or "you don't really want me" and stuff like that.

Your answer is 100% wrong, because you are groveling, you sound a bit like a cheezy romantic comedy. Don't put yourself down. Instead pull her up.

Now, it's true she doesn't deserve you. Since she has low self-esteem, if you sincerely think she deserves you, she will come to the conclusion that you also have low self-esteem. You are pussy-whipped, and therefore weak. She will dump you for a more alpha male who will treat her like crap, like all her ex-boyfriends did, which explains her current state.

So, be more positive and pull her up, flip the tables and lead the way. Try something like "what could you do to deserve me then?", make it sound funny, add smileys, and let her come up with ideas. Basically lead her to actually DO something that will actually raise her self-esteem instead of just feeding her attention. Maybe she actually has ideas that you will like! Thay would be a lot better than her using you as an emotional tampon.

And if she says she's a bad person, reply "I love bad girls."

[Drew94]

She is telling the truth, she isn't 100% a good person like most of us and you're probably trusting her too much right now. She's letting you know this. She could also just feel like her affection for you is fading, or simply doesn't know what she wants. If you act like you want her unconditionally it will make the situation worse and probably cause a break-up. Rather retain your dignity and realise that nothing lasts forever. Besides, if you pull back for a bit you at least give her room to find her feelings and create a stronger chance to keep everything intact. But if you smother her now it will always end badly.

[Asker]

That’s great advice, thank you

[americas_sweetheartx]

As a girl, I used to do this in high school, but I do have depression no lie about that. But if she feels guilty about something she did to u or behind ur back is why she could be acting this way. Hopefully its nothing serious.

[Karnak09]

I'm living the same situation. Giving her my life and everything to make her happy, without receiveing anything. I know it'ds a difficult situation but you have to keep faith in your story. She is not confident at tall with herself and feel like she does not deserve to be happy so don't push her too much, I don't know your story but maybe give her some time

[Asker]

It just started out of nowhere, she said she was upset and that it wasn’t my fault, so then I was comforting her then she said she doesn’t deserve me, it’s a crap situation to be in because I feel I deserve a little more than “I guess so”

[Karnak09]

I feel like it's a stupid feminine logic to act like this. If you do something she goes like "I donlt deserve you", but if you don't do anything she will get mad because you don't understand her. Sometimes the fault doesn't belong to the man (yes yes) and our girlfriends have to get their shit together and grow up

[Asker]

Exactly dude!!

[Karnak09]

The problem is that I don't know if there is any end to such situations. She is my world and I don't lose hope but it's hard to dedicate her your life and nothing comes in return...

[Asker]

100% bro, they don’t realise how deeply it affects us when they don’t show appreciation for our efforts, I don’t even know anymore

[JanPeNrw]

I lived in nearly in the same situation. And everytime she did something cute or something i loved about her i instantly told her. There may come a lot of this situations, but you just have to keep going. Somewhere on the line she hopefully understands how much you mean to her and she can see her own worth.