My wife and I had a huge argument... Was I wrong for saying this?

[Anonymous]

So I and my wife just got back from dinner at my friend's birthday dinner he had at a restaurant. He rented out a section for us, so we were the only ones there. He invited me and a few of our old college friends. They brought their wives and I brought my wife. He also invited two girls and two boys. They are his colleagues so I didn't know them too well. So I introduced my wife to the people who didn't meet her yet and after that, I settled her in a set, and then I did as well. One of the girls was odd, however. During the whole dinner, she kept staring at me and finding small ways to touch me. Like taking off my glasses and talking very flirtatious and trying to squeeze my forearm. I told her to stop and I even tried moving away and getting closer to my wife and most important telling her that I'm happily married. Whenever we were close to my wife, she would act normal. I really wanted to tell my wife at that time, but my wife would've gone nuts. So I kept my composer until she did this. We were ordering dessert. I let my wife order first then I did. Immediately after I said my order she said "I'll have whatever the cutie in the glasses is having" I looked at my wife in fear and my wife looked at me with an angry face. My wife was pissed. I know my wife. After that happened she didn't say a word and the girl kept flirting. I ignored every flirtatious move the girl did. I tried talking to my wife, but she would not say a word. When we got home I tried talking to her, but we argued. She blamed me for the cost of the girl flirting with me. She was saying that I'm 'too nice". My wife is not really a friendly person. She's stunning so she gets hit on 24/7. The thing is I don't. I told her this. I told her that I can't control when guys stare at her and check her body out and I told her she can't either for me. I think she took it the wrong way. I tried apologizing but she isn't talking to me. I hate arguing with her and when she's to bed upset. was this?

[Bestvibeguy]

I think it sounds like you maybe liked the attention from the other girl a little bit of flirting with no intention of it ever going anywhere can be ok
but you mAy have just rubbed it in your wife’s face without releasing that
see is watching your every move
your out with her and should have been paying her 100% of your attention if a woman was given you the come on signs it would probably be best to say to your wife that another woman is doing things that although you find it flirtatious and nice that your getting her attention you would rather leave as she isn’t getting your message that your married and not interested
I would have thought your wife would have felt reassured you were only interested in her and you would have taken her home and she might have shown you how much you really mean to her and that she was reassured that you can be trusted to make the right decision when someone try’s it on with you
remember that she’s not all ways going to be there every time this might happen but when she witnessed this it has instilled her mistrust in you and you will have To gain that back if your serious about her

[pass_the_celery98]

I don’t think it’s your fault and I think women are just wired that way. I’m single, I don’t have a girlfriend or wife. But it wouldn’t surprise me if I did have a girlfriend then all of a sudden I’m getting stares. I think we live in an era where there’s not a lot of genuine relationships where two people love each other and care dearly for each other. More often now, guys and girls/men and women seem to think it’s fine to party, drink and flirt (one night stand purposes). I’ve seen girls online take pride being home wreckers, it’s awful.

You said you didn’t flirt with her back and I believe you. You can’t control other peoples feelings for you. Just leave your wife alone. Do a nice gesture by buying her favourite food and some 🌹 out of the blue and hopefully that will be your gesture that you do care and love her. Hope it works out for ya.

[Isismoonie]

The wife was angry because of the problem which was the annoying girl and not you. Don’t take her anger too personal.


In this instance, you could’ve done as another user said which was to leave. In some form, unfortunately you had to set a super stern and firm boundary. Ask to move away from her etc so that your wife is comfortable.


Your wife saw what the girl did as disrespectful to her and her relationship.

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

You’re not in the wrong for saying that, but I don’t really understand why she is mad.


You told the girl to stop and that you were married, and you moved away from her… What else could you have done? Not much.

[TrippyStarry]

Sounds like you’re not man enough. Most men who are proper men and married happily, don’t let a bad thing happen twice. They recognise the intention of homewreckers and change course before the first move is made. For you to be on the receiving end of all this debauchery in front of your wife while you just sat there is wild! Honestly I wouldn’t be surprised if your wife dominates you at home. If that’s the problem, then you need to take a long hard look at yourself and see where life went wrong and make an immediate change. I wish you the best!

[Luggit]

Okay a live and learn situation. You know how your wife is. You know you don't like what you're going through at this time because of it. I'm sure your wife will calm down eventually and things will more than likely smooth out again. So my suggestion the next time this happens? .. Leave, taking your wife with you.

This whole time your wife is seeing this, which is causing her to burn up inside as she's trying to keep her cool, but her cool got a little overwhelmed. Keep in mind she's probably more angry about the situation than she is at you, but she doesn't realize it, she just knows she's pissed, so she's taking it out on you. She may realize it later, and she may not.

Next time just leave if you come across those circumstances again.

[AviatorTom]

You were doing fine until you started talking about how guys hit on her. That was a BIG MISTAKE. You should have simply told her you didn't encourage the "cutie in glasses" and said nothing more.

[TrillXHippy]

Don’t let it bother you

[Avicenna]

Yeah, you were wrong