Mixed signals or not interested?

[KrisKhaled11]

So I know this girl we went out two times (I knew her before that and some friends said she looks interested in you), the second time I told her I like you she said I don't know what to say and smiled. After that by a month we talked again (I usually prefer to talk in person) at university I told her is it weird I told you I like you? she said no but I think you weren't honest I said why she said we don't know each other that much but she always acts friendly and nice. we have a presentation at the university she insisted to come to mine and when she did hers I told her I will come she said more people will make her nervous but I went anyway after that I asked her did that make you nervous she said no but I don't know why did you come. I also sent her a follow on Instagram but she declined it although we have a lot of common colleagues.
So now I don't really know what to do on chat I always start the convo and she responds with long texts usually and chats but sometimes she just doesn't continue the conversation
should I send her a follow again on Instagram? should I drop the whole thing? should I tell her anything?
note: I told her you are beautiful two times and she just didn't say anything.

Updates

+1 y

Okay, I was thinking that my next step would be to tell her that I didn't get an answer and If she is not interested I prefer we be friends (which I mean, I won't think of her that way again) does any of you think that is correct?

[08__Andrew__80]

From my experience with girls, when they like you, you know they like you kind of thing. Many women have the ability to pierce into your soul when you make eye contact like they're telling you "yeah, dummy, I like you" and can definitely feel it. I think her not responding when you said that you liked her is her having manners but not really interested or she has a boyfriend but it seems from your post that she doesn't (?). Women often can be quite cold to men they aren't interested in, so the fact that she isn't short and dismissive in her messages is the only hint of confusion.

I am quite confident with the information you gave, that you should focus your energy on someone else or appreciate being single, which the music industry has given a bad name. Always sad, lonely and desperate songs if your single but in reality you can really figure things out as you have internal conversations and time to think. Also you can practice nunchunks alone in secret and then one day, when shit goes down, you calmy whip out your nunchunks and F*****' nunchunk the shit out of whoever is deserving until it's just you and twenty dudes broken around you. Women throwin' their bras at you.

I know you know this but, if you are too available/needy/nice/goody two shoes, she'll think you aren't "it" enough to be in the top 20% of men, which is who she truly desires and she is often willing to share rather settle for less. Which is bad for many men but is good for our species because she has to make sure her kids have the the best chance at life and being 5'4", dumb, boring with peanut allergies is not what we need to make more of.
Good news is, it's not solely based on looks but awesomeness as well, like nunchunkin'.

Don't compare it to many guys that will like someone, potentially for a long period of time, years maybe, like my little hot tamale at the bank ggrrrr, but often NEVER do anything about it, except daydream about her and your life together (I'm Tarzan, She's Jane). A women would have figured her way in if she was that smitten is what I mean.

If for some reason she does actually like you and I'm telling you to not bother with it, she will make it known to you, believe me.

Lastly, if you can't fathom having the hots for one of the millions of other hotties in various shades and styles available here on Earth and you're dead set on this woman being your destiny, well you better contact me and we'll initiate operation "change her mind" like I did for Jeff Bezos.

And if that doesn't work, you will just have to move on, I know tons of hotties by the way.

Also, try to go for identical twins, because you got double the chance and if you screw up with one, you get another shot.

Good Luck ☘️

[oh_k789]

It can't be affirmed for sure that you have no chances with her.
However, you have to step up the quality of your "game".
You use wrong, inexperienced tactics/behaviours, such as telling her she looks beautiful to you.

[oh_k789]

It's not about it being correct or not. It's about good strategies or bad strategies. A bad strategies makes the outcome you don't want more likely; a good strategy makes outcomes you want more likely.

You seem prone to selecting bad strategies, and I think that's due to lack of experience.

[KrisKhaled11]

You are right I am inexperienced but I think honesty is the best solution I just think otherwise I would be wasting time and energy, but I want to know what is a good strategy is your opinion?

[oh_k789]

Honesty is for sure the best choice. However, honesty doesn't have to be "tell everything from day one" at all.

Even being honest, try to plan and behave in a way that maximizes the chances of the outcome you want. Humans have a psychology, and the "how" is an essential part of communication — and may influence a lot the reaction to what you communicate —.

[oh_k789]

"should I send her a follow again on Instagram?"

Don't do again something that didn't work before. (General rule.)

Don't tell her she is beautiful, or hot-looking (other general rule).

** ** ** **

An open admission of feelings won''t make a woman who is between liking you and not liking you move to liking you. It will leave her indifferent, or push her into the not-liking-you "square" (think you are playing on a board).

Showing you feel the *need* for her will give the same outcome as open admissions of feelings. These are things that you can do once she has fallen for you, never before/otherwise.

So, what to do? Don't rush, push, hurry anything. Be relaxed. "Happen" to meet her in person sometimes, and try to have quick, "light", conversations. From time to time (after a while) you'll say something like let's have a coffee together? Let's watch a presentation together? and the likes.
If she mostly accepts, go ahead — still sticking to the rules —. If she mostly or totally declines, start unhooking your mind from her existence (yes I know it can be painful).

[KrisKhaled11]

Okay, I will try that thank you for your advice.

[Claudia233]

@08__Andrew__80 @oh_k789 I am impressed! I didn't know there are men who understand women so much 😂
@KrisKhaled11 take these guys advice! Long story short - you are in the friend zone now. Either stay friends with her (she might even help you understand women's behaviour better for the next time you like a girl) or just move on

[gabby100]

Sometimes its just down to vibes, OR you dont click. You try but it just does not work..

[Helotome]

Move on darling. She isn't interested

[Helotome]

I like your update. Get a final answer then see from there. I root for you. Don't do that in texting but face to face is better!

[Anonymous]

She doesn't seem interested.

[In_Trance]

Not interested