How to I fix things with friend I feel confused and hurt how do I fix?

[Themermaidqueen]

We have been friends for fifteen years. I received a letter from her saying hey let's have a girls night and hang out call me ! I called her three times because I am going away on a work trip she seems irritated when I answer. Her husband seems happy I called. She asks who I am and why I am calling her and that she's so so busy. Then she said Hope's I am ok and happy and she so enjoys our friendship. I rolled my eyes after that. I don't think she wrote that card after looking at it. I think her husband wrote it. I looks like his handwriting. I sent her a card and said sorry I bother her. If she doesn't want to hang it's cool just tell me you have moved on. I told I do the best I can. Maybe I am projecting I am really depressed about my life in general. Her husband said something to me at their winter wonderland bash she gave me a beautiful gift but was too busy to talk to me. Which bugged me. He said he is sorry I am a good friend and she doesn't deserve my friendship. She made out with me when she was completely wasted last year when they were separated. I was stunned and it was weird.

Give up

Hide away from the world

Keep trying

[SueShe]

Give her some time to get back on her feet and let her contact you first. If you try to contact her first, she will feel pressured to answer you and since she seems to be so busy, it is not likely to happen very quickly.

She is probably in a phase of her life where she has to set priorities and you seem not to be one of her top priorities. That is not really what a friendship is all about.

I see it that her husband contacted you for 2 reasons.

1) Their marriage was on the blink already at the time when he write you and by writing to you, he would hope that a good friend like you could perhaps help keep the ship from sinking.

2) He may have seen you as a possible substitute for his failing marriage and by writing to you, he reached out to you, again in the hope that he could get a little closer to you. Why would anyone write a card or letter on someone else's behalf without the other person knowing about it?

You best fix it by giving her time to get back on her feet. If she still has not contacted you first in 6 months, then you give it another try. If she still is so distant, then you just have lost a "friend".

[Themermaidqueen]

Thanks she is successful and has three of everything! But her life has not been a happy one. She seems empty.

[Biancam13]

I'm sorry this is happening to you. Friend breakups are the worst (not saying you're breaking up by the way.) I would honestly give her the space she clearly needs right now, and wait for her to come to you. In the mean time, meet some new friends. Branch out. You shouldn't just rely on one friend no matter how long you've been friends or how close you are. If she comes back, she comes back. If she doesn't, well, she doesn't deserve your friendship.

[Themermaidqueen]

Like she invited me over one day. The tension was so thick between them she was on the verge of tears and kept getting up to get stuff. Then she rushes me around and tells to watch tv with her husband. She didn't even offer me coffee. Her husband finally did. Then she sent me me a nice present and said thanks for our beautiful friendship. I sent her a card that said thank for the present but it would be nicer if you could relax and sit and talk to me at dunkin

[Iron_Man]

See her in person take her out to dinner and treat

[Themermaidqueen]

She's too busy to hang out with me

[Iron_Man]

You have to try and make amends

[Themermaidqueen]

Thanks

[Iron_Man]

Be positive you’re welcome

[Justneedtokno]

If you really care for this person and want them a part of your life, then you don’t start trying they’ll come around and when they do be there for them

[In_Trance]

Something doesn't seem right here

[Themermaidqueen]

That's what I say. I feel whiplashed.

[Anonymous]

Keep trying. Good friends are hard to find.